Speak Plainly
by ElleThom
Summary: Part Two of my earlier story, The High Road. Two people must learn to crawl together before they can run together. AU from Last of the Time Lords.
1. Chapter 1

**I wan't sure if i wanted to do this, but i decided i would go ahead and do this one. I wil post much more often for this one. Hope you all enjoy it, thanks for coming back for seconds.**

Nothing had changes. If she was upset by this, she did not let it show openly on her pretty face. Aside from the car seat on the jump seat.

At least it was no longer duct taped.

He stood by the console, preening as if he expected her to say it was bigger on the inside. They had gone through that routine before, this was a new chapter, a new page in their existence together. In the end, she moved to the chair and set Adric in it.

"So," she sighed as she sat into the empty side of the seat.

The Doctor, having exhausted any hope for any sort of reaction set about sending his ship into the vortex. "So..." he offered over his shoulder. The awkward was a nearly palpable thing between them. Like two ex lovers forced to share a cross country road trip in a car with no radio. "He sleeping?"

She nodded, allowing the silence to envelop the console room again. "Where are we off to, then?"

The Doctor swung around, relieved to have something to talk about between the two of them. "I thought we would go somewhere quiet. Somewhere we could get to know each other a bit...better?" he allowed the last part to rest as a question.

"That sounds vaguely smarmy." Martha offered in return and smiled at his discomfort.

He shrugged. "It wasn't how I meant it. In fact, I thought we could go somewhere resort...ish."

"We're traveling with an infant, Doctor. I don;t know how much resort...ish you are going to get. And, if I recall, the last time you went to a resort it wasn't exactly the best time. In fact, Donna told me how bad it really was." she said. "Where is Donna, anyway?"

"Ah, there you see." he smiled and shot into a manic display of piloting. "That is how I can shoot two birds with one high powered ray." he grinned back over at her, but turned back quickly into his ministrations. "We are going to go visit Donna. Well, Donna and Lee, well. Donna, Lee and the 50th century." He cast a timid smile in the direction of the diminutive woman across the room. Anyone would wonder at the aspect fear just hiding behind his brown eyes.

"Donna?" Martha foisted forward a bit, resting her hands on her knees.. "That sounds fantastic."

The Doctor smiled fully then, no fear or trepidation. "Great, fantastic. Molto bene!" he shouted and threw the handbrake. The infant beside Martha let out a sudden surprised wail in answer. "Oh, sorry, forgot. He hates that." he smiled shyly again.

As Martha reached over to take him out of his seat, The Doctor bounded across the room and stopped her. "Here, let me. " he offered, gently lifting the baby. "It's my fault he is up,"

"Can I get that in writing?" she asked, arms folded. "I fear this is going to be a reoccurring theme this year."

The Doctor ignored her, he shifted the baby to one arm and held out his hand for her. Martha shook her head, refused his hand and stood. The Doctor sighed softly but his countenance remained as light as it had been. "I figured you needed to get some of your thigns..." he said as they walked toward the doors of the TARDIS.

"Brought me home again, then?" she said, with enough of a lilt to convey to the man next to her that she had not forgotten, nor had all been quite forgiven.

He nodded. "No place like it." The two stepped into her apartment, the Doctor seated himself on the bed as Martha moved around her room. She brought down two large suitcases and begin to fill them. "After a year, you bring me back to today, right?"

"Tentatively," he smiled back, jiggling the baby on his knee. "But, that is a long time from now, isn't it?" he spoke to the baby instead.

"We'll see," she shrugged. By the time everything was ready, Martha was tired. She'd called jack and her mother and left messages for any possible issues. But, she cautioned them not to call and mess up her time lines. Jack's phone went to voice mail, but her mother picked up, and, for the first time since Andric's birth, Francine seemed pleased with her daughter.

"Everything allright?" the Doctor asked from the door of the TARDIS. He'd placed the now sleeping Adric in his room. The Doctor now eyed Martha's bags with a mixture of fear and hope.

Martha nodded, "Everything good." she placed her iphone in his hand and he mindlessly waved it with his sonic. "Universal coverage." he smiled. "Though, this iPhone, you really should get the iPhone 12. So cool."

She replied with a look of stern disbelief, to which he shrugged and grabbed for her bags. "Well, we should go." he offered.

Martha nodded and followed him to her room. He stopped in front of her door. "It's next to Adric's." he said, pointing to the door next to hers. "And, mine is there." He pointed to a door further down the hall,

"Cozy." Martha said, moving toward Adric's room The door opened into a room filled with all of the mystery of the universe. The ceiling held bright stars that danced and moved overhead The floor was soft, almost mailable under her feet. Martha moved around touching things, inspecting. "You did all of this?" she asked pointing at the walls. They were covered in various circular shapes in varying sizes and colors. They circles seemed to move on their own, but on closer inspection, Martha could see it was only her perception of them.

"I had help." he nodded.

"What are these, these circles. I have seen them before."

"It's Gallifreyian." he said. "You have probably seen it on the systems in the TARDS."

"Is that your language? I mean your home language?" She said, tracing her hand over the intricate lettering.

"Yes, well. Actually High Gallifreyian is the 'official' language. "He added, even using the quirky quotation finger wave. "But, this is the one we all used."

"It's beautiful.' she breathed before she even realized.

"Oh yes, it is based on geometry. Not the one you know, mind. Its complex and fragile and beautiful. I am hoping that Adric will learn it as he grows." he stopped, watching her reverie. "You could learn it too. I mean, I could teach it to you, if you like. It would be a good idea."

Martha shook her head. "It looks like it would take a lifetime to learn."

"All languages take a lifetime to learn, Martha. Language is a breathing living, evolving thing. Well, active languages are anyone. This one, is as dead as a Pryllarian Root Mouse." he came to stand beside her and ran his hands along the wall.

Martha noted his sad affectation before he wiped it away. "It's not dead, you still speak it." she offered.

The Doctor shook his head. "No, no it's not the same." The Doctor gave ann uncharacteristically nostalgic glance at Martha before speaking again. "But, maybe, if I speak it...and Adric learns it...and you..."

"All right, I'm game." she smiled. She brought her hand to his lips before he shouted one of his loud catchphrases. "As long as you stop doing that when Adric is sleeping."

"More conditions, Dr. Jones?" he mock whispered.

"I just would like to take a nap before he wakes up again."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

She found him under the grating. His legs stuck out at seemingly impossible angles as he alternately whistled a near familiar tune and cursed. "Doctor?" she asked, Adric held on her hip.

"Oh, Martha!" a loud clang followed his exclamation, punctuated by a stream of obscenities.

"Language!" she admonished, holding her hand to the baby's ear.

"Oi!" The Doctor rose from his position, rubbing a spreading red mark on his forehead. "h, that hurt, how was you nap? Did he wake you? I would have thought he would have slept longer with all the excitement. Ready to go to Lagos?"

"Is that where Donna is?"

The Doctor nodded as he pirouetted around the console. "Yup."

The ship landed with a gentle thump," Bags?" the Doctor asked.

"How long are we staying?"

"Oh, you know." he waved. "As long as is needed. You know, there are pink pools here. You could swim in pink water that leaves your skin feeling like a baby's cheek."

They stepped out of the doors, the view that greeted Martha made her gasp. "I've never seen anything like this. " The world was a cascade of colors; lush and vibrant. Trees in technicolor, grass the shade of burnished topaz. The sky was blue and held three suns, all dazzlingly bright. They had landed on what looked like a cliff, the mountains and fields off in the distance reminded her of something out of a animated palette, only more subtle and richer in texture. There was nothing cartoonish about the view. Felt as if she had stepped into a renaissance painting, rather than a Disney film. The Doctor smiled at her before walking off the cliff.

"Doctor!" she shouted, reaching her free hand out to try to stop him. But, the Doctor only smiled and seemed to float in mid air. "Invisible topography, Martha. Isn't it amazing."

"It's frightening, Doctor. You nearly gave me a heart attack!" She shouted at him, refusing to go any closer, Martha clutched the now fretting baby closer to herself.

"Oh, come on! Its not that bad." he did few jumps to prove it was safe. "See, completely safe."

Martha shook her head and backed up against the TARDIS. "This is what I mean, Doctor. This si what you don;t understand."

He offered her a funny look from his perch, still standing seemingly in mid air. "I don't see, Martha. I don;t get why this upsets you. You have seen marvelous things before, this is just one of them."

"But you didn't tell me? What if you were holding Adric, and I stood here watching you take that first step? Its not fun to scare people, it really isn't. You have to tell me things, you should have said something."

The Doctor nodded, he came to stand beside her again. "I just wanted to show you something, interesting..."

"Oh, you did, but I still would have found it interesting had you told me what it was!" she nearly whispered. It was te shock, the something so different than what she could comprehend. "I thought you didn;t see the cliff, or something."

He didin;t laugh, and for that, Martha was truly grateful. He reached his hand to her cheek and fixed his eyes on her. "I am sorry, Martha. I truly did not think it would cause you to react this way."

She allowed him to touch her, mostly to affirm the idea that he was there, still alive. "It's a bit of a shock, Doctor." she said.

He nodded slowly. "Of course." He took her hand in his and led her to the precipice. "See, Lagos is using a technology that allows them to make some of their topography invisible. Basic cloaking science, really. Cheap parlor trick, really. The reason? The resort we are going to," the Doctor pointed out a building that looked more like an ancient Scottish castle. It seemed out of place and somehow wrong in the technicolor setting. "advertises that getting here is a walk in the clouds." He took her hand and helped her make the leap of faith onto the unseen path.

Martha took tentative step after tentative step, never looking down. She held onto Adric as if the gentle breeze wafting would blow him away at any time. Her face was a mask of concentration and absolute focus. "I used to be afraid of heights." she finally admitted.

"Used to be?" he smirked gently.

"Mt. Fiji." she answered. The Doctor said nothing, he knew what it was, knew it had something to do with The Year. "I hung off the side of a peak for two days, the roads were blocked, and at that height, there was no other way down than the main road."

He nodded, keeping her talking as they continued to walk, noticing her steps became more determined as she spoke. "I was in a harness, I had been climbing down, trying to get around taking the road. I got stuck. Nothing to look at but the view. Mostly cured me. Mostly."

The Doctor squeezed the hand Martha did not realize he had been holding. "I am sorry for the gaffe. From here on out, full disclosure."

She shook her head. "I over reacted.'

"No, you said, for this year, to speak plainly. I can do tht, Martha. You ask me anything I can give you an answer. I was only trying to dazzle you. I didn't know about your fear-"

"_Old _fear.' she corrected with her head held high.

"_Old_ fear. Sorry." he grinned at her then as they reached the front entrance of the castle. "here we are, then.' he smiled.

"I thought we were going to meet Donna here?" Martha asked, surprised at her own voice.

The Doctor smiled. "Oh, didn't I tell you?" he grinned and pointed to the front of the hotel. A portrait of Donna and Lee greeted visitors.

"She owns it?" Martha asked as she looked at the painting.

"Well, she and Lee own it. That was part of the reason she left. She wanted to be here to help run the place. Apparently, Lee is from a wealthy family."

"That's Donna." Martha smiled, the redheaded woman came tearing through the large entrance hall as if Satan himself was at her heels.

"Give 'em here!" she shouted, arms stretched in front of her. Martha was not sure if she should hand over the baby, or run.

Donna took Adric in her arms, "Oh look at you! You are bigger since I saw you, " she gushed.

"Oh, it hasn't been that long." the Doctor insisted as Lee came to stand beside Donna.

"Oh, really?" Donna turned to Martha. "When is he going to learn to fly that thing right?"

"Probably never," Martha shrugged. "how long has it been for you, Donna?" she asked.

"10 months." Donna nodded, "10 months ago, he said he was gonna go and try it on his own for a while." She looked at the Doctor and shook her head. "I see how that turned out."

The small group made their way into a large parlor. The ceilings were high with windows that streched the length of the walls. Here was a spectacular view of the mountains. "He do that thing to you?" Donna asked when she caught Martha looking at the invisible topography.

"It wasn't funny." Martha insisted.

"No, it wasn't when he did it to me, either." Donna threw a knowing glance to her best friend. "Some people think they are funny though."

"Quite right." Martha nodded. "This place is fabulous, Donna." she smiled.

"Oh, yeah, its like I hit the National Lottery, innit?" she smiled and cuffed Lee on the shoulder. "I am glad I found him tho. We got married here on Lagos about 9 months ago." Donna turned another deadly glare to the Doctor. "I was supposed to get married at home. With my family nearby."

The Doctor shrugged and wisely kept quiet.

"Oi where are my manners? Its like I was raised in a barn!" she turned to her husband. "Lee, take the Doctor up to their suite. There's a good boy!" she offered Donna a knowing grin. "We have plenty of people to do it, but its the best suite in the place. Can;t have my best mates, and my god son here, staying in less."

Martha noted how quiet Lee was, he had a stammer that made conversation often tedious. He was absolutely perfect for Donna, and she could see that he adored her. The Doctor slapped Lee on the back and the two grabbed the suitcases and made their way to the lift.

Adric was visibly relaxed n Donna's arms. "he likes you." Martha noted.

"He should, I took care of him that first week. That only week."

"I know why you left." Martha blurted suddenly. "I understand why you did it. I am sorry I put you in that position.:"

But, Donna shook her head. "it's not as if you were in your right mind. My mate Katie had post partum pretty awful. She called me up one night to come out, said she was this close to drowning her two week old daughter. She begged me to come over and watch her."

"The baby?" Martha asked.

"No, Katie. She did not trust herself with her. I stayed at her house for about a month. Its a good thing I was between jobs, then. Katie just need that confidence. I left in the middle of the night so she couldn;t talk me out of it. I knew it was time, the worst part had passed." Donna looked at Martha. "Has the worst part passed?"

Martha nodded and accepted Adric into her arms for a feed. "it was...difficult."

"I see you two are together then."

"Not like that Donna." Martha insisted.

"I _know_ not like that. I ain't blind." Donna said. "But, at least you are trying."

"I felt duped." Martha admitted.

"You should, you were. It happened. Was it for the best?" Donna shrugged. "Who knows, only time can tell if it was."

Martha looked down at the baby in her arms. Was it worth it? She wondered mentally. Adric wasn't what she had expected. "he is everything to me." she whispered.

Donna nodded. "Then give it a try, yeah?"

"One year." Martha spoke again. "One year we are going to travel together."

"That is the silliest thing I ever heard." Donna blew. "And, what do you do after that year, if you don;t want to stay on the TARDIS? Are you going to cut him in half? Over my dead body you are."

Martha smiled, perhaps Donna did deserve the moniker of god parent. She certainly was ready to kill for Adric; always a good sign in choosing someone to help keep your son safe. "So," Martha steadied, "Tell me about your wedding, was in fabulous?"

"Oh, I got pictures!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

The Doctor and Lee came back from the lift just as Adric had finished his feeding. Donna promptly took him into her arms and snuggled into Lee's side. Together, the newlyweds shared the hologram of their wedding, there was everything in the images except being able to taste the Walleyed shaped cake. The longe had begun to fill with guests returning from their afternoon activities, and Donna suggested a shower before dinner.

"Its a lot to take in," Donna told Martha as they walked out of the lift. "But the room s are fantastic."

It was, even the crib was beautiful There was so much to describe, that Martha found her mouth for want of words. She stood turning in circles. It was much like a castle, large foru poster bed, deep rich jewel toned bedding made of velour's. "Its like a fairy tale royal bedroom."

"It used to be, til his queen had him beheaded."

"Whoa, really?" Martha placed the baby into the opulent crib.

"Men really ought to take more care with where they put things, know what I mean?"

"Let that be a lesson." Martha grinned.

"All right then, shower, dinner in two hours." Donna reminded her from the door frame.

"Right, two hours," Martha agreed. After the door shut, Martha laid back onto the bed and wondered if this was the bed the dead royal had slept in. How fragile love was. Had they started their marriage in love or was it arranged?

Arranged, she could understand. She had recently felt like an Indian bride herself. But, what of the arrangement? What happened after a year? Was she brave enough to walk away if she was unhappy?

Martha slept laid across the bed with her shoes dangling off the end of her feet.


	2. There's Nothing To Understand

**You guys are so sweet. thanks for all the love, can't believe how much fun this one is to write. Seriously thanks for making this story your favorite and reading it and all that. I am enjoying this journey**

She'd slept through dinner. It was inevitable. Every time she got on that ship, there was always some form of Jet Lag she had to accommodate within the first few days. It seemed to hit her harder this time, when she awoke, it was dark. The large bay windows gave a view of technicolor beauty, muted in darkness. All three suns had set, and Martha felt that odd disconcerted feeling like waking in the TARDIS and not know how long she had slept.

A check of the crib and Martha knew someone had been in her room. Th cot was empty, and for that she was both worried and relieved.

She found the two of them in the sitting room of the large suite. The Doctor was sprawled across the sofa in the parlor, one arm around Adric while his other hand steadied a copy of Charles Dickens 'A Tale of Two Cities.' His brainy specs perched atop his slender nose; his face bore a look of peace that Martha rarely saw covering his features.

"You're awake." he smiled as she jumped.

"I thought you were asleep." Martha moved to gather the fussing infant in her arms. The Doctor was unwilling to let him go, but the squeal that emerged from Adric made his protest moot.

"I was." The Doctor began to unfold himself from his comfortable position. "He gets his feeding time, and you missed yours."

"Jet lag." Martha answered.

"I brought you a take away if you're hungry." he offered sleepily. "Curry."

"Probably not the best thing for me to eat." Martha looked down at Adric then back at the Doctor.

"Oh, right, sorry" He grinned, stood up quickly and reached for his coat. "Right then. I'll go and rummage for something more suitable."

"It's all right, Doctor. Really. I'm fine. I'll go and get something in a bit." Martha watched him hover at the door, wavering as if the answer she gave was not good enough. "Why re you being so nice?" she asked quietly.

His features could not mask the confusion of her words. "Nice?" he asked. "I don;t know what you mean. It's just curry."

"This." she gestured with her free arm around the room. "This isn't you. You aren't like this. This isn't just curry."

He thrust his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels. "It's to be expected." he nearly whispered.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Nothing to be sorry for, Martha." the Doctor grinned. He sat next to her on the small sofa and moved his arm round her. Her first instinct was to move, to not allow his alien invasion into her personal space. "This is a vacation, its been a bit of a rough year."

Martha could not argue with that; yet she found a way to. "It's been a rough couple of years."

He nodded again. "Yeah, yeah, it has."

In the end, he ordered her a sandwich, and she put her feet up and listened as he talked. He went on about life, his life; he was open, and honest and Martha felt as if she was talking to an old friend that she had just met. He spoke of his past 'lives,' companions he had loved, and lost. Martha held the baby as he tlked, and even allowed him to stay seated next to her on the couch. It was the familiarity of the thing, that old odd feeling she had first noticed in the TARDIS. The feeling of absolute safety and satiety being near him,

"You know, I have probably, at one point or another, in one face or another, been to every point in Earth's time. " His hand slid behind his neck. "It's a real wonder I don't run into myself more." He stopped then, a sort of sad stop. A moment crossed his face that Martha thought was an eternity of solitude. She realized then just how foreign and alien he really was. He was not some guy she had met at work, or picked up in a bar. He was a proper alien.

As fast as the look had crossed his features, they were gone again. He smiled big and sat up straighter. You know, there is a guest here, an old friend, who, I think would love a visit." he smiled.

"Really?" Martha said. "An old friend? Mine or yours?"

"Little of both, actually. Well when I say both I mean..." he stopped suddenly, noting the look of agitation on her face. "I am doing it again, aren't I?"

"You do love to dazzle." Martha said by way of agreement.

"Yeah," the Doctor admitted. "Just this once, will you let me surprise you?"

"Is there a possibility of any danger visiting this friend."

The Doctor held up two fingers. "Scout's Honor." he offered in mock seriousness. "Please? I promise, you will love it."

"Well, since you said please."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

The next morning the Doctor waited in the parlor of their suite as Martha got ready for their meeting. She had know idea who they were meeting, and the Doctor offered no more clues. He paced the length of the room with Adric on his shoulder. "The thing about women, Adric, well the main thing about women. When I say the main thing, I mean the only thing that I know, specifically about human women. " he rubbed the small boy's back as they continued their up and down pace of the floor.

"The thing is, they will keep you waiting as long as possible. The best I can figure, its some sort of intricate defense mechanism. They do it to see if you are wiling to wait. I have discovered, that this is a test, Adric, to see how far they can push it. There is nothing romantic about it, it's just the way of their people."

"Quit filling his head with nonsense." Martha huffed as she entered the room.

"It's not nonsense, " the Doctor defended. "This is a valuable life skill. He is a nearly human male, I am sure when he comes of a certain age, he will want to date someone human...ish. I am merely providing necessary information." The Doctor finished his rant with a knowing nod.

"Right then," Martha nodded and leaned over to mock whisper into Adric's ear. "He's especially full of himself today, Adric, just go with it."

"Are you undermining me?" The Doctor asked.

"Nope, just making sure my son does not grow up a misogynist." Martha kissed the baby's head, the Doctor sniffed audibly in supplication and followed her to the door.

The hotel was divided into five separate buildings. Martha and the Doctor were staying in the oldest, and therefore most prestigious (snooty) of the compound. A path floated in the middle of the precipice that led to the actual floating building. It was far more modern, nearly hyper pretentious in its odd shape and stand out design. The Doctor barreled ahead, as Martha took a deep breath with every step over the canyon. Halfway through, she made the mistake of looking down, telling herself she should look, if only for the experience.

So she looked down.

There was nothing. The open view of hills and fields underneath her feet in oil paint colors nearly made her fall to her knees in fear and awe.

"Martha, you alright?" He had stopped next to her, wondering if she was going to faint.

Martha nodded bravely, closed her eyes and attempted to right herself. "Yeah," she promised.

"Looked down, did you?" he asked with a grin.

"It's absolutely dizzying."

"Like looking up a tall building and falling backwards." Martha nodded. "Oh yeah, i've done that. Remind me to take you to the planet of Ghkyrti. One great big city. The buildings are so tall, that the streets hav to be navigated on a three dimensional grid." He took her hand in his, offering comfort where it was needed, and was surprised that she allowed him. "It's just one of the places we will visit. I promise."

"Right," she nodded, still looking forward.

He came closer to her, walked beside her now instead of slightly ahead. He leaned closer into her and whispered. "Martha, don't look down." It came from his lips as a wistful hope, and Martha wondered if he was still talking about the walk. As he moved, sometimes her shoulder would bump into he,. Or his arm would invade her personal space.

Martha smiled back at him, she held off mentioning the year; that everything was tentative and fleeting. He seemed to really be trying, but the past loomed over them like the hotel floating in the clouds. She wanted to believe him, she really did. But, she also knew that there would come a time, given his past history, that hee would forgo the arrangement of absolute honesty. Yesterday, even in it small affirmation,, had proven that. Sooner or later, the second trainer would fall.

The inside of the modern hotel was as fantastic as the outside. The walls were all transparent , The Doctor explained to her that each individual room could modify its wall for opaqueness. "You know," he sniffed. "For privacy and all that. You humans love your privacy, but surprisingly, most come here and choose to leave, at least the outer walls, completely open."

"If you were this hotel, you would be as solid as the castle over there. Walls half a mile thick." she accused.

"Is that how you see me?" he spoke, stunned. He stopped moving through the great hall and had turned to face her.

"Yes," she admitted. "you keep so much close to your breast, nothing worn on your sleeve."

"It's all up my sleeve." he remarked, without any mirth. "There is so much, Martha. I thought last night, you could see I am really trying."

Martha was surprised at the hurt in his voice, and her righteous indignation quickly turned into remorse. He had taken the mick out of her faster than anyone ever had. "I didn't mean=..." she tried.

But, he had already turned forward, hands in pockets, strolling purposefully to the elevators.

They arrived at room 1408, the Doctor had managed to slip into his normal mania, while Martha still brooded about her actions. Before knocking on the door, he turned to her and spoke. "It's important to not say too much, yeah?" he said, his hand on the baby strapped to his front. "It's all right, but, when you see. You will know."

They were greeted by a handsome man in Daisy Dukes and a tank top. "Can I help you?" he asked in perfect English in an accent Martha could not place.

"Hello, I'm the Doctor, this is Martha...Dr. Martha Jones. Is he free?"

The man in the provocative dress moved aside and swept his hand in front of him. His demeanor had gone from professional to friendly. "Oh, mah, yes, doooo come in! He hasss been waiting for you!" The young man ran his eyes over the Doctor's form, rendering the ancient alien a bit uncomfortable. "I can see it," he grinned.

"See what?" Martha asked with a smirk." She did not receive an answer, as the man had turned and bid them follow him through the sleek rooms. Every wall was open, rendering a feast of color and surreal landscape at every glance.

He was seated in the tank, in front of the window. Martha noted he was younger than when first she saw him on New New Earth, and the Doctor noted the same thing, but referenced a different time. "Hello old friend." he smiled, placing his hands on the glass.

The Face Of Boe's expression became on e of absolute joy. "Doctor, I see you made it."

"Course I did," he grinned.

"Martha," The Face of Boe turned to the woman next to him, who had come to place her hands on his tank as well. "I always loved getting a visit from you, if this tank wasn't here..." his letcherous grinn engulfed his giant head.

"Not now Jack!" The Doctor moaned and rolled his eyes.

"Course, you could always climb in here, Nightingale. I got plenty of room..."

"Oi," the Doctor warned. "You're talking about my..." but his words stopped. An uncomfortable glance exchanged between the couple, and Martha felt her face begin to burn.

"Well, well, would you look at that." Jack chuckled. "Nice to know I can still make you blush, Martha."

But, Martha had sat on the couch as far away from the Doctor as she could find. "So, what are you on vacation, then?" she asked by way of a subject change.

"Welllll" Jack hemmed, " Yes and no. I was hoping to catch you. Had to wait til I knew the two of you were coming for you honeymoon."

"Jack..." the Doctor warned, ignoring Martha's need for distance, he came to sit next to her and handed Adric into her hands.

"Oh, the little one." Jack said. "Oh it's so strange to see him stil in diapers."

"No spoilers, Jack." the Doctor warned, shuddering at the memory of someone else who warned of Spoilers.

The three friends spent the afternoon going over old and recent times. Martha felt a sense of disconnect at the haphazard use of tenses, that she had just left Jack, young and still full bodied, in the 21st Century. And now, here he was, in his much later years, god only knew how far into his near endless future. "How old are you now, Jack?" she asked with a smirk.

Jack mocked indignation with a sigh, then answered. "Old enough to know better, and young enough not to care about the consequences."

"Yeah," The Doctor added. "We met your house boy."

Jack smiled again, "Oh he is delicious, isn't he? So nice to have something to look at in my waning years." he sighed.

"Waning years my arse." Martha snorted. "You are a horny old man, dirty to the core. And, the worst part is, you were like that when I met you."

"I will have you know that I was not that old when we met." Jack defended, but smiled all the same. "It's really nice to see the two of you, especially traveling together. And Addy."

"Addy?" Martha asked. "Oh, no, you are not giving him that nick name. That is horrendous."

"He already has it" Jack explained. "But, this could have been where it started. Hw old is he now?"

"Nearest I can figured," the Doctor answered, actually scratching his head deep in thought, "Bout a month, two maybe. It's all pretty wibbly-"

"...wobbley yeah, I get that." Jack answered. "Listen I need your help, On Zybtha IV. People are dying mysteriously. They say its a plague, but you know the Zybtharens. They're like Apple computers, they don;t get sick."

The Doctor's face became a stony mask of determination. A plague." he repeated. "That is high improbable."

Jack nodded. "I would have gone myself, but..." Jack closed his eyes and sighed. "Not as spry as I wonce was. Besides, I knew I would find the two of you here."

"What are the symptoms?" Martha asked, her curiosity peaked. She loved a good medical mystery, but the idea of people dying, especially otherwise healthy people, made her itch to help, to stop what ever it was that was causing it.

"There are no symptoms. The Zybtharens do not get sick. They present as healthy, then just drop dead. "

Martha pondered this. "Wait, if they don;t get sick, then are they immortal?"

"No," the Doctor answered with a shake of his head. "Zybtharens have a predetermined life span, like certain plants. They are born, they like for 67 of their years, and they day. Same day 67 Zybtharen years later. "

"That's depressing." Martha said. "To know exactly when you are going to do, to have that hovering over your head your entire life. How do they do it?"

It was Jack who answered her. "They feel its liberating, Martha. You should read some of their literature. They know exactly what they want to be from an early age, they map their lives out. No surprises."

"Well, except for poorly timed accidents." The Doctor interjected. "They can die from trauma, but its a world that knows that nothing lasts forever, they have it etched into their exxistence from the moment of conception. Accidents aren't really a problem, because every one takes everything into account. Its a near Utopian society."

"i find that hard to believe." Martha added.

"There are a lot of things that you have not yet seen, Martha Jones. I am surprised that you are so closed minded about a society that can actually get on with each other." Jack shook his head reproachfully.

"I have seen the nature of humans, Jack,"

"They aren't human Martha. Barely humanoid in fact. " He turned back to Jack and leaned forward toward the tank. "If we go there, wil they let us on? They are frightfully xenophobic."

"oh yes, I already arranged everything. " Jack said. "They are waiting for the two of you."

Martha and the Doctor shared a look the same thought passed beside them. Neither one wanted to take Adric into a dangerous situation. Neither one wanted to leave him either. It was a situation they knew would eventually happen, but both chose to ignore the possibility, as if it could be avoided by simply not discussing it. It was the story of their relationship.

Jack seemed to understand the situation. "Might I offer a suggestion?" he purred.

"We're all ears. Martha answered and clasped her hands around Adric a bit tighter.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"He'll be fine," Donna assured the two nervous parents. Their demeanor would have made her laugh if they had not been so tragically serious. It was like parents going out for the first time and leaving the baby with a sitter.

"We should be back before his next feeding." The Doctor said.

"Provided you fly that thing right. " Martha humphed. "If I miss more than four hours of his life, I am gonna so get you." she folded her arms and leaned against the front of the ancient ship. "Honestly, what is the point of having a machine that travels in time if it's never gonna go where you want it to?

The Doctor reached over and lovingly stroked the side of the ship. "She knows this is important, she will get us back on time." he smiled. Martha had to agree, something about the sentient ship seemed to sing since Adrisc had been born. She was gentler in landings, and never moved his room.

"Oh, go on now." Donna insisted, holding Adric as if he was the last baby in the universe. Martha dipped down and planted a kiss on his cheek. He smelled like warm milk and talcum. "Donna. If anything happens to me/"

"Stop it, artha/" Donna shook her head.

"No I mean it, just make sure you..."

"I will." Donna nodded. Just go so you can get back before he gets to thinking I'm take away."

Martha followed the Doctor into the TARDIS and finally allowed him to shut the door.

"We will get back, I promise. " He tried to reassure her.

"I'm gonna go to the infirmary and get some stuff together. " She tried to hide the crack in her voice, but she knew he heard it; but he was nice enough to not point it out to her.

By the time they made it to Zybtha, Martha had assembled a barrage of instruments for medical testing. She had heaped them onto a cart and parked it by the door. "I would rather do the testing on site." she explained when the Doctor asked why she was absconding with half his ship. "I would rather not =run the risk of any pathogens in here."

He nodded, the Doctor had always appreciated Martha's intelligence and her pragmatic approach to situations. She really was a Doctor, something, that he seemed to overlook at times. "Ready then, Dr. Jones?"

"Absolutely. Let's go save the universe...again"


	3. Yes, There Are Mysteries in the Basement

**This was a hard chapter to write, but it is out and i hope it is all right. I know, a filler chapter, but the next chapter will be more informative. All of this is set up necessary evil type stuff. Thanks for the love, I hpe you all like this. **

The planet was n;t anything particularly beautiful, r special. At least not of what Martha could see. It was, actually quite a bit like Earth. She smiled to herself thinking of referring to it as an M class planet, but that was a reference from Star Trek, and she knew the Doctor usually huffed up a bit when comparisons to that show are made.

The cart sat between them as they stopped outside of the blue doors and took a brief look around. They were outside, it what looked like a countryside. A large and slightly curvacious meadow spilled out in front of them. The air smelled sweet, and Martha had the feeling the season had to be spring currently on Zybth.

"Consider ourself very fortunate Dr. Martha Jones. Not many people are allowed on this planet. They are more exclusive than a P. Diddy party."

"I'm sorry," she smiled. "Did you just reference P. Diddy?"

The Doctor shrugged. "I've been to a few of those parties. All in one night in fact. Had to dig for hours in that wardrobe to find a white suit. But," he grinned and brought his feet up. "Did find white chucks."

Martha shook her head and placed her hands on the cart. "Right, then. How do we find where the action is?"

"Oh, don't worry. This planet does not cotton out of towners. The action will find us soon enough."

"What do you mean?" But the Doctor nodded his head and Mrtha followed the motion. Far in the distance a band of shapes were making their way toward them The individuals seemed to be tall, a stark hue of yellow, and plumed in drab olive clothing. There were at least twenty of them, and at such a distance that Martha could not make put any distinguishable features among them. "I assume that's the welcoming committee."

"Martha, you are one of a handful of people that have ever visited this planet. And, I bet one of the first humans." he held his hands clasped in front of him and spoke lower. "Just remember to smile and don;t be too intimidationg."

"Me?" she said. "Intimidating? I am more concerned with how much should I trust Jack. Are they going to take us to their leader, or shoot on site."

"Well, we''ll know in a minute, won't we?" The Doctor answered, A wind had kicked up suddenly, the breeze blew his brown hair around his face and Martha could not help but to appreciate the view.

She saw them then. They arrived in a straight line, yellow creatures with oval shaped heads, long bodies and slender appendages. Martha would have called them spindly, but not to their faces. She plastered on a smile and tried not to think about Adric.

"Well, look at that, Martha. We get the full regalia."

"How'd they know we were here?" Martha asked, swiveling her head around in search of the CCTV cameras.

He turned and looked at her, "Oh now, that would be cheating Martha. Cameras are nothing more than a chepa parlor trick. The Zybtharens would not cheapen themselves with surveillance."

She shook her head and opened her mouth to ask how they knew, but the crowd was upon them. The shorter one in front, had his hand out in a greeting and his wide mouth crooked into a friendly smiled. "Ah, you must be the Doctor."

"I hope so, I'm wearing his shoes." the Doctor answered. He placed his hand upon Martha's arm "This is Dr. Martha Jones."

"Tellarian?" the man asked.

"Earth." Martha nodded, her hands clenched the cart tighter for support. Something about them their alieness in such an Earthen setting, made her dizzy.

"Ah, of course you are. I think there are quite a few people n this planet that will be very happy to se you. " He said to Martha. "Very interested indeed."

"Oh look at that, Martha Jones, celebrity." the Doctor laughed. "Well, ti suppose, before they start organizing parades and erecting statues, I think we should, I don;t know, maybe find out what's killing you lot off.

"Oh of course " The man, who still had not given his name, bowed and les the couple through the fields in the direction they had come.

"Still doubt jack?" The Doctor asked.

"Yes," Martha nodded. "But, at least this time he was right. "

"Keep your eyes open, Martha. Anything around here could be a clue as to the nature of this plague."

"You say that like you doubt it really is a plague."

"Oh, do I?" he sniffed. "Guess only time will tell, eh Martha?"

"Hyox," the man next to them spoke, what Martha thought was a complete nonsense, until the Doctor answered the utterance.

"Good to meet you, Hyox. Nice place youhe group stopped at a large tree, whic have here."

The spindly creature pulled his ovular face into what Martha assumed was a smile. "We like it, yes." The group came to a halt in front of the largest tree that Martha had ever seen, and she was the only one surprised when the base swiveled open to reveal stairs.

"Gonna yell at them for nto warning you." The Doctor smiled as he followed her down the stairs.

"Nope, I am, however, making a mental list of things to nag you about later."

"Oh, good, something to look forward to."

The Zybtharans did their work underground. Hyox explained that this was as not to mar the beauty of the plante. The Zybtharans could live above ground, play in the sun, and not worry about damaging the scenic beauty of their world. Long, well lit tunnels spanned the underworld. It had an earthy smell tht reminded Martha of her mother's garden. The Doctor smiled the whole time as they made their way via the moving walkways. "This is amazing. Absolutely amazing. Isn't this amazing Martha?" He gushed, but did not stop long enough for her to answer. "All of this underground. Motion. Marvelous way of thinking, innit? Doing all the dirty business underground, leaving nature above to just =be...natural. This is absolutely amazing."

"Reminds me of the time I had a six hour layover in O'Hare Airport." Martha grumped. The place did, for some reason, remind her of an airport, without the planes, and security checks.

The Doctor ignored her, he fired technical questions at Hyox who answered them quickly nd in great detail. Martha feared she would fall asleep on her feet, moving at twenty miles an hour.

"The medical arena is over here." Hyox led them through a set of doors that dipped further down into the depths of the planet. "We have been keeping the infected remains here, we thought it would be best to keep them in an area not accessed by anyone except medical staff."

It was finally Martha's world. As they moved down the elevator into the=further reaches of the planet, Matrtha fired off directions. "I'll need to set up right away. I would like autopsy at least three of the victims. "

"We have done that, Doctor Jones, our best people found nothing irregular in their genetic make up, nor anything that would point to a reason for their sudden deaths."

It was the Doctor who spoke up. "Well, Martha here is good at finding things. Plus,we brought all of this equipment with us." he patted the cart in front of him. "I would hate for it all to go to waste."

Hyox nodded. "As you wish. We did ask for help"

"Right then, I also need a lab, access to all of your previous findings, and the medical files on the victims. Plus, if they are free, I would need to talk to the families and the other medical staff."

"Of course, whatever you need. We are desperate to end this."

XXXXXXXXX

A day later left them no close to figuring anything out. Martha had performed three autopsies back to back. Watching her work, the Doctor again noted that feeling that Martha Jones was a force to be reckoned with. He wondered if she knew what she was capable of, what her true potential was. He stood next to her, as her assistant. She ordered cultures, tests, and performed most of them herself. While she worked on the autopsies, he meticulously went over the reports.

"Nothing." Martha announced with her head resting on her folded arms in front of her. They sat at the table in the small set of rooms that the Zybtharans had offered them. The rooms were adjacent to the labs, a blessing since neither one was ever out of them longer than three hours.

The first night, as Martha hovered over the second autopsy, the Doctor tried to get her to take a nap. Martha responded by ignoring him while continuing her examinations. He never tried after that.

"How can there be nothing?" she asked imploringly. "It doesn't make sense." She didn;t say the words that they both were feeling, but never verbalized. She missed Adric. The first two or three days she managed to keep busy, keeping him off of her mind, mostly. But, by the time things became redundant, the tests were all coming the same negative over and over, the autopsies revealing nothing, Martha was ready to admit defeat, throw her hands in the air, and rush back to Lagos.

But, she knew she would never do it, and the Doctor knew she would never forgive herself for doing it. It was a fragile balance, not wanting to give up, but not wanting to be without her son, either.

"No," the Doctor shook his head. "It makes no sense at all." the frustration was inevitable. Three days ago, there had been another death. A male, out of the clear blue, and not far from their makeshift labs. Martha and the Doctor had both gone to the scene, and were surprised at the Zybtharans willingness to allow them full access with no questions asked. Their openness spoke of the desperation of the situation.

There was nothing on site, the man, still young in his twenties, had simply passed out dead while he was at work. Thee was no connection to the other deaths, no correlation based on anything ingested nor consumed. The deaths were only happening in a localized area, that was the only thing they had to go on. The rest of the continents on the planet were free of the disease.

"Maybe its just a blip in their natural genetic code. " Martha suggested as she rubbed her eyes. Maybe its just an anomaly in their evolution. Darwinism in reverse."

"You really don;t believe that." the Doctor offered with a shake of his head.

"No," she admitted, "But, you don;t think its a plague, either. What could it be?"

The Doctor shrugged. "Maybe it is a plague."

"You really don't believe that, do you?" she asked him back.

He shook his head and it was his turn to sigh and rub his eyes. "What are we missing?" The Doctor jumped up from his seat, nearly upturning his coffee. "I need to go back to the TARDIS." he shouted suddenly.

"What, what is it?"

"I want to scan the area, something in all of this isn't adding up. We have been looking at the small picture too long. I think there is more to this than a few simple deaths."

"There is nothing simple about these deaths. "

The Doctor nodded, "Either way, I will let you know."on a whim, he leaned over a nd kissed her quickly on the cheek. He left before she could protest.

XXXXXXXXXX

He didn't really think he would find anything. It was more a need for solitude and missing his oldest friend that lead him back to the TARDIS. He followed the path he had memorized that first day and easily made his way back to the sentient shit.

He rubbed her side as he entered, smiled at her warm greeting and made himself comfortable around the console. It was going to be a simple scan, a reading of the planet's life systems, weather patterns, radio signals; basically everything. He knew it would take some time, she was an old ship. He and Martha had spent a week checking the medical end of things, but like any good fractal, one had to pull back to make sense of the smaller picture by looking at the bigger one.

He plugged in the commands and sighed. It was odd how empty the ship felt with everyone gone. He could not deny that the everyone he was thinking of was narrowed down to two people. One very small, and the other very nearly hated him. They had recently began to get on each other's nerves. Small things, in small ways. The language was angry, but the truths were all simple and honest. They both missed Adric, and trying to save the universe was nothing in comparison to holding their own.

The Doctor sighed, refusing to slip into any sort of self flagellation when there was work to be done. He watched as the TARDIS performed her initial scans and wondered if there was time for a cup of tea.

There was, there was always time for a cuppa.

By the time he had made it back to the console room, Martha's tea cup full of Earl Grey, He looked at the screen to track the progress. He knew it was a big request, and he could feel her groan from the strain of the scans. "I know old, girl, take your time. Its not as if lives are depending on it."

She groaned louder as if to remark on his cheek. "Ten hours?" he fumed after reading the progress line. "Well, I suppose if that is the best you can do."

The Doctor considered holing up for a the time in the TARDIS, doing some repairs, but he knew Martha was waiting, and the last thing he wanted to do was make her wait. He set up the information to be sent to his link in the labs and left.

XXXXXXXXXX

She had decided to not consider the kiss. It was a little thing, probably done on a whim A distraction from the chaos they had mired themselves into. Martha set about to perform another test when a junior technician she had been working with all week came into the labs in a rush.

"Dr. Jones, " the technician named Joygen huffed, the girl was young, as Martha had learned over the week, most of the workers here were. But, when you only had 67 years of life, it was good to get an early start on things.

"What is it?" Martha asked impatiently, "Has there been another death?"

Joygen shook her head. "NO, I have been sent to fetch you."

"Fetch me?" Martha smiled. "For what?"

"The First King has requested you come and give a report of findings so far."

"I didn't know there would be a meeting with anyone high up." Martha shook her head. "There is really nothing to report."

The young woman went on. "It's how we do things, here, everything has to be accounted forl. Its been a week and we usually expect results by then."

Martha sighed. "Dont we all. Look, I have to look at a few cultures first, can we make the meeting for say, an hour from now?"

"Now." Joyge answered in a tone that Martha understood was no wavering from.

"Why now?" Martha asked. Joygen did not answer, Martha threw her hands up. "All right, lead on MacDuff."

XXXXXXXXXX

He strolled into the labs expecting to see her hunched over a microscope, or elbow deep in Zybtharan body parts. What he did not expect, was to find both the labs and their room empty. His first assumption was that there was another body that had appeared, someone else had died in the two hours he had been gone.

The Doctor perched himself upon the stool that Martha normally used and waited for her. In the time he measured cultures, fiddled with equipment she normally would not let him touch, and found himself wishing she was there to yell at him.

He left the labs and began to walk around the vast underground complex. The inhabitants of the planet had built intricate pathways throughout their planet. The use of underground work and passageways left the pair with a disconnect in seeing how the Zybtharans lived. He decided it was time to take a walk on top of the planet.

XXXXXXXXXX

She was lead to a room that held three white metal plaques on the floor. Martha had seen Star Trek enough times to know a teleportation system when she stumbled across one. Joygen had escorted her to the room, but they were joined outside the labs by ten other yellow spindly people dressed in that same olive drab. For the fist five minutes, she assumed they were he escort to the royal family. But, when Martha asked whether they should wait until the Doctor returned, the small contingent became agitated and more forceful.

"Right, " she nodded when one offered her a full view of what could only be a weapon, strapped to their side. "Guess I get to meet the king. "

She wasn;t worried. Not in the sense that she thought the Doctor would come and save her at any time. That was irrelevant, for the Zybtharans could, in fact, shoot her at any time as well. The idea that the Doctor was in danger worried her more than anything. He was prone to doing stupid things, it was his nature. Not that he didn't always come out of it, but the worry that plagued her was what would be the collateral damage on this, and if she were part and parcel of the next great sadness the Doctor would tell to his next companion.

She sighed as they filed into the room and wondered when this whole thing had gone pear shaped? Had it been a setup from the get, and what would be waiting for her at the other end of the transport.

As the trasport shot her body over space in a trillion tiny particles, Martha wished hse had hit Jack harder.

XXXXXXXXXX

The sun was of the usual life sustaining variety. There was nothing fantastic nor fantastical about it. HE followed a browned path through a small wood that led past the giant tree they had first encountered. The Zybtha was a lot like Earth, which, he supposed, accounted for the locals fascination with their planetary double. Small differences were mostly limited to size of the planets organic systems, mostly due to the larger size of their planet in comparison to Earth.

He finally came upon a smattering of houses, the kind that were more traditional to the planet. Large, bulbous dwellings that seemed would have been carved out of the side of mountains. They typically lived in areas together of family importance. The Doctor knew all of this not from previous visits, he had met many of them over the years, and their existence was near legendary.

"Hello," he waved to a group of what had to be children. They were kicking a ball in the center of the road, it reminded the Doctor of the last time he was in London.

The three small children eyed him suspiciously for only a minute before scattering down the road toward the houses. They even left their ball in the road.

"Well, now I know how Casper feels." the Doctor shrugged. He understood that, children should not talk to strangers, something he planned to never instill into Adric. It was a rubbish idea, better to teach children to get out of situations rather than make them petrified of every situation they come in contact with.

But, the again, the universe was a strangely dangerous place.

He dug his hands deeper into his pockets and began to whistle a tune as he walked. Martha would surely be concerned about where he had gotten off to, perhaps he should return to the labs. Just as he had talked himself into turning around, he heard them. A cacophony of screams that cae from the direction he had been walking toward. He wanted to get back to finish the cultures Martha had started, her really did. But, when had he ever run from screams?


	4. There Are Comic Books Upstairs

**Thanks for sticking with me on this one. You all know the journey always has a rough start. This one is just starting to get interesting. The love is so good, you guys make me write more! Hope you are having as much fun as i am...things are gettting pretty heavy now **

The room she materialized into was nothing like she had ever imagined. The room was lit in green haze that was in stark contrast to the brightly lit room she had been shot from. Martha looked around at the sparse room, and realized that no one else had followed her in. She was alone.

She immediately began to search the walls next to her to find a control for reversing the transport; it was not the first time she had wished for her own sonic screwdriver. It was an impossible dream to find the right sequence of buttons, but Martha still gave it all she had.

In the far recesses of the room, a buzzing began that set her nerves on edge, and made her sick to her stomach. The buzzing began to form words. "We have found one," the voice said.

XXXXXXXXXX

He couldn't help the adrenaline rush he felt at the onslaught of trouble, some have said he fed off of it. A bitter supper of tragedy and death, he always thought. But, he did eel alive when he ran. Horribly alive.

The screams were coming from the structures in the distance. The Doctor followed the beacon like a ship in tow. His feet skidded to a stop in front of the house where the screams seemed to be emitting. Further evidenced he was in the right place was offered in the form of three people running t=from the building. So, of course her ran inside.

The scene in front of him was of utter chaos. A mother held a child in her arms, a child no more than three or four years old if he had to guess. It didn't matter, the little one wouldn't be having any more birthdays. "Can I...?" He asked, hands out in front of hi. The woman holding the child eyed him with all of the pent up wrath of a caged panther.

She moved the child away from his reach and glared at him. "No, no," he insisted. "I'm the Doctor." he tried to reassure the grieving mother. "I just want to see if I can help."

The mother glared at the Doctor, but turned to offer the limp child to him. "Please," he asked as he lay the child on the floor in front of him. "Please contact senior Hyox at the Municipal Labs." he gave her the contact information, then brought his sonic out.

"Oh," he muttered to himself as the small device scanned the child's body. "Oh, that is not right. Not good either." He looked at his watch and found the time was still too soon. "Damn."

The Mother had returned to his side, "They are on their way, they will be here soon."

He looked at her then, despite her yellow skin and oddly ovular face, she could have been Martha. It was the calm strength in the face of absolute terror that impressed him. He wanted to console her. He wanted to tell her he could fix this, this world he could save. He wanted to take her with him, show her enough of the Universe to make her forget her pain. "I'm sorry, I'm so, so, sorry." he offered instead.

The tears from the woman next to fired his insistence to finish this, to confirm what he had already feared was causing the deaths on Zybtha. "When they get here, " he asked, rising, "Don;t mention my name."

She nodded, tears still falling in sheets."We didn't all want this." she insisted. "I know who you are Doctor, I know why you are here. We all do." The woman wiped tears from her eyes before going on. "This is too much of a sacrifice for something that not all of us want. I was happy with the way things were, happy to have my life mapped out. It meant few surprises. This." she hugged the body of her son to her. "This si too much of a surprise. This is too much of a sacrifice."

"I understand." And for the first time in a long time, he did understand, for that mother cradled her son, but he pictured Martha holding Adric. It was too much of a sacrifice, and they all should have known better. What he was witnessing was one of the most unnatural occurrences in all of the universe, but here, on this planet of planned lives and predestined fates, it was an abomination on the most sacred level.

"Make it stop, Doctor. Please. " she continued to stroke the face of the child in her arms. "Make them go before anyone else feels what I do."

He nodded, and found his own way out the way he had come. He left in a hurry, knowing he had to stop an invasion, find Martha, and get them both the hell off this rock. If they were lucky, if he was as clever as he protested, it would be in that particular order.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Found? She asked, straining to see toward the back of the room. "Found what, exactly?" While Martha Jones had always been a curious person, a trait which lead her to both medicine and her current position as the Doctor's second banana, she however had no curiosity regarding the beings in the back of the green lit room. In fact, she had no desire whatsoever to figure out what they were. The buzzing was bad enough, but the fact that there was something oddly familiar about it all sent shivers through her that were too much to bear.

She had begun making her way against the wall, back toward the transport pad that had sent her here. The buzzing sound grew closer, and Martha fought to keep the panic of that knowledge from clouding her intellect. She took two steps toward the metal plate, her hand had accidentally struck the emergency button.

"We have gone through great lengths to get to the one."

"Ones," the other buzzy voice corrected.

"That's not proper English." Martha insisted. "Ones shouldn't be plural." It was only after she had opened her mouth that she realized she had spent far too much time around the Doctor, she was starting to sound like him.

The two voices trilled their opinion of her knowledge of the English Language. "You silly git/ Come close." it insisted.

"I'm fine, thanks." Martha said.

"You make us come there to you, and its going to hurt." the second voice warned.

"Yeah," Martha nodded, "I am pretty sure it will. What, are you anyway?" she asked."Come close, child," the first voice announced sweetly. "Come here and we will tell you."

"You are going to make all of our dreams come true." the other voice sang. Martha was sure there was only two of them in that room, but she knew there was no telling how many there were all told. She had the TARDIS key on a chain around her neck. Even if they did not want her, they wanted that ship. She knew that wthout knowing exactly what they were. She had not yet seen them, but could hear their voices. That familiarity was at the edges of her consciousness and drove her crazy.

But, even without knowing, the TARDIS was Adric's home, and the Doctor's, anything that may take that away took away her son's future, and could very well take away her son. The realization of that terrified her more than anything that these creatures may do to her, or the Doctor.

Martha shook her head. "No thanks, I think I have seen the way this movie ends. " she placed her hand over the button she prayed was the emergency recall. Even if it flushed her atoms over trillions of miles of space, it would be a far better experience than what the buzzy things had planned.

Whatever was to come of her, she would not be the vessel to destroy them, to destroy him. In some recess of her mind, she felt her love for him, a feeling she had corded away and filed under 'never.' So much under that bridge, too much to allow to flow into a river for fear it would over run into a torrent of emotions that Martha could not deal with. And, now, as she faced the terror of an unknown assailant, she wondered if she would ever have that chance.

Martha took a deep breath, sent a silent prayer across the universe as she hit the button under her palm. For the second time that day, she thought of her son and hoped he never forgot her.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Where is she?" The Doctor insisted as he burst into the labs. He had run all the way back to the tree, had pushed his way through the hordes of workers on their way home, fought the opposite direction to fet back to the labs. He didn't give a single whit about the tests or cultures that were cooing in the labs. He knew those would not amount to a hill of Larva; there was no result that was going to find what he now believed was brewing on Zybtha

The Zybtharan he had directed his question to was one of the young scientists that shared the lab space with them. They worked toward the same goal, and often ate together. This Zybtharan was used to the Doctor's sometimes brusque manner. His question was fired off in his usual rapid fire manner, but his eyes. It was his eyes that scared the young scientist. "She's not here?" the young woman asked.

The Doctor considered the young woman's words. "Is that an answer? Or, did you ask me a question." the Doctor moved closer to the young woman. "Because, if you ere clever, you would answer in a way as to not give away to me what you know. If that is the case, your answer is suitably mystifying."

"I'm sorry?" the woman asked.

"Yes, I suppose you are. I suppose you are very sorry. But why?" The Doctor searched te room, noted there were no open longs, no new experiments set out. It was as if there was nothing to do. Which, didn't set right because he knew there had been a new death. By all rights, they should be rushing around in a panic. There should be fifteen scientists in here jockeying for position. But, there was only a low level scientist. Why?

"Doctor..." the young woman was scared, the Doctor could tell she was frightened, and he did not care, because what was going on here, had every right to cause real fear.

"_Where is my wife_?" he asked again.

"Wife?" She moved away from him, scooted in her rolling chair in the opposite direction of the irate man. Theirs was a culture not familiar with strangers on their planet, so to have an irate alien in front of you, it was more than she could bear. " haven't seen here, I thought, I thought she would be with you."

But, he waved her away and strolled out to the dark high hallways. If he was right, and he usually was, no matter how often he wanted to be wrong. If he was right, this time, his wife was in as much danger as he. They had to get off this planet and get somewhere safe. Somewhere they would not find them this time.

He found Hyox trying to avoid him. It was outside one of the outdoor canteens where they often found tea and breakfast. The tall spindly man was recognizable to the Doctor by his evasive activity. The Doctor approached him with a painted on smile and a dubious glare. "Hyox, the man I wanted to se."

"Doctor, I hear you were out for a stroll earlier. Met some of our locals."

"And found a new victim, which is where I thought you would be right now. Or, at the very least filling out some of that paperwork you are always going on about." It was true, the man went on about his security job ad nauseum. Martha would listen with pretended care, but the Doctor always gave him a shoulder of indifference.

Hyox, who was no fool, could tell the way the wind was starting to blow. "Well, day off, ad all that." he smiled, showing the Doctor his nearly emptied cup of tea.

"Day off, really?" the Doctor frowned. "Funny you should be here, underground on your day off. All that fresh air and sunshine. I thought the whole point of having all your work under here was to have that vast beautiful planet as a playground on days like this. Not, to be stuck inside under the surface. What's the fun in that? I remember when I was-"

"Doctor," Hyox asked exasperated. "Does this story have a point?"

"Yes, yes it does." the Doctor nodded, "Where is Dr. Jones?"

"Well, she should be in the labs, I mean, that is what you are all here for isn't it?"

"Don't" the doctor warned. The storm raging across his features should have served as a warning to the man in front of him. Should have, but it did not. Secretly, Hyox's flippant behavior solidified the Doctor's belief as to the true nature of Martha's disappearance, and the reasons for the deaths on this planet. "Don;'t play games with me. Not now, not about her."

Hyox's long spindly arms folded into a pretzel know in front of him. The workers behind him were smart enough to at least take a few steps backwards. But, Hyox was a fool, at least he though he was righteous. "Doctor, go back to the labs. I am sure she will show up. Soon."

"Of that, I have no doubt. However, she won't show up the same person I came here with, will she?" the Doctor asked.

Hyox ignored his question, pushed past the angry humanoid and scoffed loudly. The Doctor seethed. HE wanted to get of this planet, let what was coming have it. It had become apparent to him that they were now in league with whatever was here.

He ran past the group of security workers and made his way toward the relay station. It was the center of communications for the planet and monitored the coming and goings of off world transport. The planet did not accept off worlders, but it did rely heavily on an import export trade. The Doctor tried to access the information with the help of his sonic, realizing onl then that he was twenty minutes from having all of the information in the TARDIS. He did not want to go back to the TARDIS without Martha, but he could not rsk being out on his own for too long. It was only a matter of time before they got him too.

He stood in the middle of the massive hallway, hands in hair. For the first time in his travels, he didn't want to decide He had never felt this close to someone where the possibility of losing them was interfering with his ability to make a rational decision. He hated this feeling, and vowed he would do something about it for the next time. Perhaps duck taping her to the jump seat, or locking her in the kitchen. Sure, that would work, and he could get his next five regenerations all in one day. If there was to be a next time, he would be more careful with her. He would do whatever it took to make sue she did not take any unnecessary risks.

As he stood, a voice came from his elbow. The unusually small Joygen was at his side and speaking to him. "Sorry?" he asked with a shake of his head, "what?"

"I didn't...it wasn't meant to be like this." Joygen admitted.

He placed his hands on each of her shoulders. "What, Joygen."

The young woman was in near tears. "I liked your Martha. I really did. She was..." the woman sniffed loudly. "They told me I had to do it, that she had to go and it was her turn. That, if I didn't, I was choosing that other world to my own. I didn't want her to get taken there."

The Doctor wanted to comfort he girl, but it bothered him that she was referring to Martha in the past tense. When you travel in time, you notice things like that, the tense of how a person speaks tells volumes about the nature of a situation. "Joygen, whatever it is, I cannot make it better without knowing what it going on. I need you to speak to me. I need you to tell me where is Martha. And, while you're at it, what the hell is going on around here?" He knew the answer to one, he merely wanted some sort of confirmation. but desperately needed the answer to the other question.

"About ten hours ago, we took her to them. " Joygen nodded, speaking stronger than she had before. "But she got away somehow. The First King is frantic, no one knows where she went. We have been checking every single trans-pad on the planet for her. " Joygen began to wring her hands, and could not meet the Doctor's eyes. "I didn't know she was your wife."

"Yeah, well, neither does she." He wished, when people started confessing,that they would spill all the details at once, instead of piecemeal. It would make things go so much faster. "Took her where?"

The young scientist shook her head and lead the Doctor to to the same room where they had taken Martha earlier in the day. She stood aside him as he checked the logs of the transporter that Martha had used. "So, Joy. Can I call you Joy? I had a very good friend once named Joy. She was a lot like you. Sad nd confused." He talked to put her at ease, it often worked, both ways. "Joy, tell me about the real reason that your people have been dying."

"They aren't compatible. " it was a near whisper, but the Doctor heard it clearly nonetheless.

"Compatible with whom?" he asked. He was searching for her file, for the signature left by Martha's last transport. His scans showed that she had indeed used this pad to be transported to the other side of the planet, only to use it again fifteen minutes later. Only, she never coalesced anywhere back on the planet. So, where was she?

Joygen seemed unwilling to answer. "They came a while ago, not too long before you got here. That was when the deaths started. They said it was necessary, it was supposed to be a merger. A marriage of two cultures into a better one. They promised us to extend our predestined life cycles."

"You should always be wary of anyone who promises so much for what seems like nothing in return." he slammed his hand against the trans-pad and swore. His outburst scared the young woman, she ran out of the room. He turned to follow her, but by the time he got to the massive outside hallways, she was gone.

The Doctor made the toughest decision he had ever had to make. He left the underground and headed for the TARDIS. He could not help looking over his shoulder every few minutes, he wondered why he was not being followed. Then he wondered if thee was a contingent of soldiers waiting for him out side of his ship. Or, was he being followed? Martha had a key, but no one could get into that ship with out a key. But, if they did manage to get her key, if they did get in...

He hurried his pace, broke into a near run. The only way he was going to be able to maybe find Martha was inside of that ship. If it had been taken, he would lose everything.

The TARDIS was surrounded when he got there. So many yellow creatures formed a circle around it, that the blue of the TARDIS was nearly obstructed. "Oh," he smiled as he skidded to a stop in front of the band of Zybtharans. "Hallo. Fancy meeting the lot of you out here. Its a bonny day for a walk, innit?" he smiled affably enough, but his mind raced to figure out a solution to the situation. They could take him, take the TARDIS. In that moment he vowed to make his key isomorophic, if he got out of this one.

That 'if' was looming pretty large as the Doctor surveyed the situation.

Hyox stood in front of the doors, he wielded a weapon that looked to the Doctor like something he had once seen at a back room Dragon Poker game. It wasn't the kind of thing one carried around to aggrevat. This weapon was for killing, and nothing else. "You will relinquish your key to this vehicle and step aside Doctor." he commanded.

"Or what?" the Doctor asked, still smiling.

The soldiers looked at each other as if they were the ones confused in the situation. "Or?" Hyox asked. "What do you think?"

"I know that if you strip away everything someone holds dear, you leave them in a very dangerous position." The Doctor's mouth was still curved into a smile, but it now matched the dangerous look in his eyes. "And that is a very dangerous place for you to be standing."

"The man who abhors violence?" Hyox laughed.

"Wouldn't be laughing if I were you." The Doctor warned.

Hyox laughed again. "And what would you be doing then?" Hyox laughed.


	5. A Wrecking Ball In the Front Yard

**Happy DW day, enjoy the new episode, and thanks for the reviews, you guys are awesome!**

"Well," the Doctor spoke with a grin. "I wouldn't be standing there for one." He had heard the hum, had known that she was gearing up for a move. The only thing he could not understand, was how. "I would want to, I mean if I were you, I would want to be standing here, where I am standing. I mean, or the TARDIS , of course. Still to get there, you really should be standing. Here."

Hyox looked at the other security men next to him. He laughed again, as if the Doctor was joking with an old friend. "I wouldn't be standing here, if you would just give me what you are supposed to." Hyox advanced upon him slowly. "Why make this any harder? Hmm?"

The Doctor folded his arms and grinned. "Oh I think this is hard enough. " Just then, the sound of the ancient engines filled the area. The movement of the ship kicked up a wind of its own. The men standing in front of the ship turned to stare at what was now empty space. Wen they turned again, the Doctor was slowly being erased by the reappearing blue box. "See," the Doctor spoke as the blue box solidified around him, erasing him from view. "I told you I wouldn't stand there."

XXXXXXXXXX

He barely had a moment to think what had moved his ship when he was encompassed in warm flesh. She was everywhere, holding onto him as if he were cast in velvet. "Well, look what the cat dragged in." he said from beneath her hold.

"Oh I was so worried I would end up on the other side of the universe three lifetimes from now. " Martha gushed.

He didn't interrupt her, he was just damn glad to see her. The Doctor felt himself sinking into the diminutive woman's touch. She held on for dear life, and he let her. A small grin formed around his face as he let the hold go on far longer than he should have.

But, Martha noticed the same thing for she abruptly let go of him and stood back. "Well, it's good to be here." he announced to her as he moved to the other side of the console.

She nodded her agreement and began to flip switches next to him. "Good thing those lessons, yeah?" she asked.

He raised his head and gave her a long look. "You did marvelously. I could not have done it better. Well done Martha Jones." he smiled.

She returned his honest smile with one of her own. She was surprised herself at how much his approval had meant to her. She remembered how she felt as she hit the button to scatter her molecules to get away from the creatures in that room. "Doctor..." she began, but stopped herself realizing this was not the time.

He nodded from his perch. "Martha, I thought you were..." he swallowed a hard lump that had formed in his throat.

"Best I can figure," she stopped her movements and looked at him. He was uncomfortable in the admission, and she figured a rescue was in order. At some point, they would have this conversation, or die trying. Right now, it was a different day. "The TARDIS grabbed me." she told him what happened, how she ended up in that greenish room with the creatures she could barely remember. "When I hit that button, all I could think was keeping this key." she showed him the key that hung around her neck. "From those things."

"Martha Jones, you are brilliant." he smiled. "A star." His face became serious. "you took a big risk, there was no way to know that the TARDIS would use that key and lock onto to you. In fact, it would not have happened had I not started scanning the planet's mechanics."

Martha shuddered. "That's just it, Doctor. I didn't care what happened."

The Doctor made as if he would dispute her words, or insist upon her importance. "You don;t understand. The sacrifice was no big deal. I thought about those things getting hold of the TARDIS, of Adric...getting hold of you. It scared me." she stood tall, proud at her perch across from hi. Her admission was heartfelt,

"Martha," the Doctor finally did get out. "You could have wound up scattered across the cosmos." His eyes spoke to his fears. It could have had a much different outcome, one that would have cost him everything.

She nodded, choosing to leave that conversation for another time. It was a time machine after all. Someday, they could jump in and fly to the time when they could have this conversation. For now, it wasn;t that day. Yet. "Doctor, what are those things?"

He turned to face her. "Don't you remember? " he asked with a sidelong glance.

Martha shook her head. I didn't see them, Doctor, how would I remember them?"

He came closer to her. "You are not going to like what I have to say." he told her.

"Tell me anyway." she insisted, arms folded.

He sighed. "Those things, Martha. Mayflies."

She shook her head crazily. "No, oh no."

"The Zybtharans were dying because they were trying to take over their bodies, like they did n=in Farmingham. But, apparently the species was completely incompatible with them."

Martha took a couple of steps closer to where the Doctor stood in front of the screen. It can't be."

"Look for yourself, Martha." The Doctor insisted, he grabbed her arm and brought her closer to him As she looked at the screen above their heads, he placed his hand on her back. He would tell himself it was a mindless sort of thing to do, but in reality, he needed that reassurance that she really was there, alive, not scattered across the universe.

"Doctor, how long has this been going on?" she asked.

He shook his head. "Joygen told me it started not too long before we got here/"

"But, that's not true, is it?" She asked. Martha could read, and what she saw showed a trend in deaths over the past lunar month on Zybtha. "They have been dying for a while haven't they."

He rubbed her back in small circular strokes. "How can you tell?"

Martha pointed at the screen, showing a rise in deaths. "They would all die in patterns, right? I mean, f you are born on a certain day, then die exactly 67 years later, chaos theory would state that there is a pattern to it. There is no pattern to these deaths." she brought up a screen showing the planet's deaths one year before in the same lunar months. "See? That's more of the wave pattern you would expect."

The Doctor was confounded by her. "Yeah," he nodded. "You're right."

"So, if that's the case, then these things have been trying to assimilate their population for at least four weeks." She stared at the screen a little longer before turning to the man at her side. "Doctor, they said that they were going to use me, use us to fix them. "

"It's what they wanted before, Martha. They wanted me and the TARDIS to live longer. They thought in merging with this culture, that they could extend their lives to 67 years. But, they weren't comparable with the Zybtharans, no matter how much science they applied to that endeavor."

"Oh, God." she suddenly felt sick at the realization. "They used our data, our research to..." she wanted to puke right then and there.

The Doctor placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her to look him in the eye. "Stay with me on this one, Martha. We are going to need to keep our heads. Don't make this personal."

Martha shook his hands off of her and moved away from him. "But it is personal! It was personal last time, this time, its...outright reprehensible. The figured out that that group of people isn;t going to satiate their need to live forever. What does that mean? It took them a week to figure out what we were, but once they did...those things mobilized against us. They took me, they were going to change me into one of them. Like they did Jenny and that little girl."

He wouldn't tell her about the child that died in front of him earlier. At least, not right now. She needed nothing else to make her angry and incite her into action. It was enough that this was an atrocity if he placed any more in front of her, it would be a massacre. "Martha, it is important for us to keep focused."

She nodded. "Right, then, what do we do."

He moved to the other side of the console and began setting coordinates. "We are still in their air space. " he announced.

"Is that a problem? I mean I didn't think we were in danger of being shot down."

He allowed a smile to tug at the corner of one side of his mouth. "No, but... Have you figured out how they knew we were here, yet?" he asked casually.

She had asked the question before, he never answered it. Martha moved back over to the screen and flipped through different windows. She loved that he had brought up the information in both a language and a format that was easily accessible for her. "Ummmmm..." she hemmed.

He came over to stand very close to her, under the guise of showing her what she was missing. In truth, like a child clutching to his special blanket long after mum and dad had shut off the lights, he needed that reassurance. "It's right there, you almost got it." he said softly in her ear.

She squinted under her own scrutiny. "Oh," she announced finally, a huge smile spread across her pretty face. "Its so obvious."

The Doctor couldn't tell if he was proud of her, or just happy to hear a light tone in her voice. "Yep! Their planet shifts phase every seventeen minutes or so. Give or take a random algorithm. It's ingenious, really. They can control who comes in and who comes out, at the same time monitoring them in less time it would take without the phase shift."

"How do they do that?" she asked. "A phase scan of the entire planet?"

"Updated every seventeen minutes."

"A lot can happen in seventeen minutes." Martha added, noting that it was rather short sighted of them.

"Be that as it may, we need to get out of here, and our window of opportunity closes in-"

"Four minutes and ten seconds." she finished for him.

"Well, now you're just showing off." he muttered happily. They worked in tandem, the two of them seemed to feed off of each other. No words were even necessary. Martha seemed to read his mind at times he thought impossible He had already been able to read hers, had been since the medbay in Torchwood. It was something for the talk later, the one that was sure to come.

"Shadow Proclamation?" she asked as they effortlessly slipped past the phase shift of Zybtha.

"Why not?" he asked. "Though, there is not much they can do, you know. " He eyed her seriously. "Martha, we have to seal that planet off for three months, do you understand why?"

Martha nodded, but turned to look at him with horror. "They could destroy that planet attempting to infiltrate their anatomy."

"It was their choice, Martha." The Doctor spoke. "They had a choice."

"But not all of them, not all of them made that choice."

Her words reminded him again of the mother with the dead child in her arms, an image he could have done without. The Doctor ran his hands through his hair and blew a long breath. "Right, they didn't."

"So what do we do? Run off into the night and let them sort it out?" She folded her arms in what she hoped was unmistakeable ire at his actions.

The Doctor tapped his chin in thought, then spun the screen around and began pressing buttons. His face had become that mask of steely determination that Martha knew only meant trouble, or danger, or both "So, are we going back?"

"No," he shook his head. "Our going back there would be a bad idea. I am going to take you back to Lagos, then I am going to come back."

"You just said going back was a bad idea."

"No, I said 'our' going back would be a bad idea My going there is only a marginally foolish idea."

"Good luck getting me off of this ship."

the Doctor blew exasperatedly, he had no intentions of fighting with her on this, "Martha, I'm not arguing with you about this."

"Oh, good, then we are in agreement. For a moment there I thought you would foolishly insist on going back with me."

"You really need to work on your listening skills. I am not going anywhere." She raised her head in that way the Doctor often did in daring down foes.

He stared at her for a bit, knowing he had lost. "You were almost spread across the galaxy in a billion billion particles." he hissed.

"Yeah," she nodded. "But I wasn't. I came back." she moved closer to him and placed her hand on his arm. "It doesn't work like this, you know. Protecting someone isn't about placing them in a glass jar and keeping them on the highest shelf. It's not the way I want to live my life. I have been in danger plenty of times. Hell, I could be run over by a car on my way to the shops, or acosted on the street by a madman on my way to work."

He smiled, realizing she was right. "You nearly were." he whispered.

"Yes, because you are only nearly a mad man. But." she moved toward the chair and sat. "I am not going to hide away because of whatever fears you may have. I have my own fears, you know. One of which is sitting around and doing nothing when I could be helping others. Sound familiar?"

He turned to her then took in her appearance sprawled on the chair in the middle of the console room. The Doctor knew it would be pointless to carry on the argument any longer, they would be there for years if he did. "As long as you know it is your duty to return safely, no matter what."

"Duty?" Martha asked with a quirk of her eyebrow. "To whom?"

"Addy," he finished darkly.

"Right then, same goes for you, doesn't it?" she stood and met him by the console "Where are we headed then, back to the labs?"

"Oh no," he grinned. "I traced the pattern from the transporter which nearly obliterated you. I found where are guests are hiding. "

"Why would they hide, anyway?" she wondered out loud. "I mean, the last tie, they chased us across the universe, or at least that was the fear."

"The horde, Martha. Its not just three or four of them this time. The scans I ran on the planet. There was the number of life signs for the Zybtharans, but under that, aside from those are thousands on thousands of those creatures. They have been busy. Breeding."

"Oh, no wonder they needed a whole planet. So, what's the plan?"

He angrily threw the handbrake forward. "Pest Control."

XXXXXXXXXX

The room was the same as she remembered it They emerged from the TARDIS, the Doctor with his usual confident brash nature, and she behind him. "Oh, look at that, you all must have the same decorator. Sort of, early American science fiction. I don't care for the design myself. I prefer more classical neo electric-"

"Emo." Martha finished with a smirk.

"Right, Emo." he said the word as if it left a sour taste in his mouth.

"You are lucky you came, we would have burned this planet looking for you." the buzzing materialized into voice.

"Burned? Nah, you won't burn anything. Besides, here I am, easy to find. I heard you were looking for me, or rather, someone like me. Well, here I am, real thing. Thought I would pop in and see what the fuss was about."

"And you brought your ship for us. How nice." the cvoice spoke again. "It will be so much easier for us to go to the next location. These people are useless."

"No one's useless." Martha argued.

The Doctor turned and smiled at her. "Quite right, too." he agreed. "Even ou lot, you have a purpose, I assume you do. But, you know what? I have a purpose as well. Its an old, tried and true purpose, but one I think has a need, especially in this situation."

"Yes, we need your ship and your bodies. We need to extend our lives and find suitable bodies for our people."

"Well, now here's the thing with that." the Doctor moved closer to the buzzing, and as Martha followed she began to be able to make out the shapes of the creatures. They weren't quite insects, more like glowing particles. "We need our bodies, haven;t quite finished using them yet. Well, I can;t speak for Martha here, Martha?"

She made a cartoonish effort of checking her limbs. "Nope, still using it."

The Doctor nodded, "Right, and as far the ship, still using that as well. So, looks like you are out of luck."

They were getting angry, their corporal bodies were changing from the greenish color to more red in nature. "You have no choice, we need to extend our lives. Our people only have a short amount of time."

"Time isn't about how much you have, its what you do with it." The Doctor sniffed. "I should know that, I have all the time in the world, some would say I've squandered it."

"Squandered is a strong term..." Martha hinted.

"Anyway," He went on. "I think the oter part of that, the...what was it? "

"Bodies for the Horde." Martha finished with a knowing nod.

"Yes, right. Nothing wrong with your listening skills." he smiled at her. "Right, the bodies thing, well. You'll find that your people aren;t quite where you left them. That's the bad news. The good news is..."

"Oh, this is the best part. " Martha grinned. "The good news is, we are giving you, just today, one free ride in the TARDIS."

As Martha finished speaking, the Doctor snapped his fingers. The doors to the TARDIS opened to reveal a large glass tube, the green glow cast eerie shadows over the console room. The tube was filled with thousands of the creatures. The green light was so bright, it nearly extinguished any other lights in the console room."Look at that, Martha. Think she could pull it oof?"

"Nah," Martha shook her head, "That shade of green clashes with the blue. It'll never work."

The Doctor shrugged his shoulders. "We are going to take you to a new planet where you can;t harm anyone. No more traipsing about trying to infect anyone else. This is the only solution, and the only chance you will get."

"You have imprisoned us." the buzzing voice cried. "We will take your ship, and you can stay here." The creatures took flight then, they moved toward the ship.

"Martha, now!" The Doctor shouted, but he had no need to, she was already on the ready with the jar and the cap in her hand. Before he could turn and say anything else, Martha had captured the two beings into the small jar. They buzzed angrily and tried pointlessly to get out through the lid.

"Told you I had it covered." She smiled proudly "Firefly catching champion on my block for four years running."

He grinned proudly at her and took her free hand. "I could not have done it without you" he admitted finally.

"Oh, you did all the talking, distracted them long enough." She held the jar up to her face and tapped the glass side.

"They don't like that." he warned from his perch at the console. "Ah, here we are then, nice fertile planet, nothing but insect life, still a bit primordial, but they will figure it out."

"And they can't get off of there" she asked hopefully.

The Doctor raised his head, "Martha, there is one thing. One tiny little thing."


	6. But, There's Blueprints On the Couch

**For some reason, this part was hard to write, and i am still not happy about it. be that as it may, here it is, hot off the presses. Enjoy all, and thanks for the lovely reviews, they really are inspiring. **

The trains clickety clack jostling nearly put her to sleep. It was unrealistic for her to believe that a thirteen hour shift would not result in anything other than the need for a good night's sleep. She wondered how things were at home, ow he had fared his first night on his own.

Not that he knew who he was anyway.

She sighed and shook her head, wondering again for the umpteenth time how it all disintegrated into yet another mess. He had explained everything, and it really had made sense at the time. The Doctor had told her everything, just like he promised to do from then on. But the promise for full disclosure was not always the easiest to hear.

They did everything they had set out to do. The Doctor dropped the Mayflies at the planet he had found. Then, they stopped at the Shadow Proclamation. After the Doctor managed to get out f his lengthy prison term, they explained what the beings had done. It was afterward, after the last 'I' was dotted and the final 't' was crossed, that was when the Doctor explained everything to her.

"We have to lay low," he said, not meeting her eyes.

"OK," she nodded. "Is that a euphemism for something else"

He nodded, looked up to the apparatus that he had used the last time. "I have to hide us, again."

She shook her head, Martha backed up against the wall of the TARDIS and began to tremble. "I can't," she said. "I can't do that. I won't."

The Doctor moved to stand next to her, he noted her shaking and placed his hand on her cheek. "It was bad last time, Martha. I don't dispute that. I was rubbish as a human."

Martha shook her head, "No, no. I..." She looked up to the Chameleon Arch, it swung dangerously over the console, reminding Martha of the Sword of Damocles.

He took her hand in his and squeezed. "It'll be all right." he promised. "We really don;t have a choice. They can get off the planet, Martha. They are beings of conscious thought, travel through space is nothing for them."

"Then why would they want your ship to travel in?" she asked, still eying the Arch above her.

His fingers drew lazy strokes over her mocha skin. "They have a very short life cycle, Martha. Three months, if we give it a year and a half, you and I won't be more than a myth in their culture, a distant memory."

"I can't do it," she shook her head, Martha felt traitorous tears forming in the corners of her eyes. It had been the one thing she had promised herself after three months scrubbing floors; that she would never again be in this position, no matter what it cost her, she would not trust her fate to him, he always placed her in untenable situation where he came out neither scarred nor shaken, but she wound up emotionally flattened. "No." she shook her head, hard and certain.

But the Doctor would not stop, he would not leave it alone. If they didn't go away for a while, and these beings did remember. It may not be him they get to. It may be Addy. "Martha," he whispered. "I can promise a better situation this time-"

She shoved his hand away. "How can you promise that? You seemed completely unperturbed by any of my misgivings the last time. You said it was only three months and it was the safest location. I don;t trust you with this, Doctor. This isn't right."

"I have no choice this time." He folded his arms and glared at the woman next to him. "Its not just me at risk this time, is it?"

It was the cold water that dowsed her into reality. She shook her head. "How long?"

"Eighteen months." he answered as if it was a drop in the bucket; it was for him..

"We have to do Addy too, don;t we?" she asked looking at the Arch.

The Doctor nodded, and they made their way to Lagos. He'd stood outside the TARDIS while she gathered Addy in her arms and put on a brave face for Donna. They had wanted her to stay there, to take the chance on being found in their cloud top paradise.

The Doctor opened his mouth to warn Martha against it, but she was already shaking her head no. there was no way, after what she had seen those creatures were capable of, would she let Donna run the risk of ending up with Jenny's fate.

They sat in the TARDIS for an hour as it twisted through the vortex. Neither one wanted to go to the next step, Martha thought, in that time, that the Doctor would have insisted to get the ball rolling as soon as possible. But, to her surprise, he let her have as much time as she wanted, which still turned out to be not enough.

Martha stood by the console as the Doctor paced inconspicuously around the room. She held Addy in her arms and watched his face with a careful smile. "It'll hurt him, won't it?" she broke the silence with a voice that trembled almost as much as her hands.

He came to her then, moved with the liquidity of water across glass. He nodded slowly and reached out to place his hand on top of the sleeping baby's head. "It will. But, he will not remember it."

"Can we put him out? I mean to sleep?" she shook her head with the image of a veterinarian's office. "I mean..."

"I know what you meant." he sighed tiredly. "I suppose we could, but I don't have to tell you that the risk is higher with him in any sort of dream state."

"The same reason you didn't do it the last time." Martha finished.

"Yes," The silence crept around them again, an eerie sort of solace that was full of so much to say. She had a thousand and one questions, but none of which would have done anything more than buy time against the inevitable.

The Doctor continued to run his long slender hand over the baby's fuzzy head. Addy had a mop of dirty blond hair that Martha wondered if it would change to brown as he got older. He was a good baby, quiet, serene. If he cried at all, it was usually to be fed. He never fussed when he was alone. He was content to sit near she or the Doctor and watch his own limbs move about. Martha wondered what that machine would do to him, had wondered if it would alter his personality as well. Even at two months, Martha knew Addy's disposition, and worried about how it would affect his brain chemistry. While the Doctor had assured her of no long term affect on the infant, she wasn't walking into this blindly, she was certain that somewhere, their actions would reap an unforeseen recompense in some distant future.

Martha moved to stand under the Arch now swung low over the console. "I think we should do him first." she whispered. "I would rather you know who you were in case anything went wrong."

"Of course." he nodded. He didn't tell her that there was no way he would leave Addy with only a human Doctor to look after him in such a dire situation. He knew he only had a year to prove his worth, mouthing off wasn't exactly the best way to win friends and influence Martha. Still, the Doctor had to wonder if this would be the straw that sent her back to Torchwood.

It took five minutes to adjust the head piece for Addy's small head. She held him as the electricity was charged through his system. The Doctor had asked if she was all right, but the tears gave him the only answer he was going to get to that question. Addy's body had gone rigid as the current drove his Time Lord essence out of him, and Martha could swear she felt every single cell change.

When it was over, Addy lay in her arms limply, his breathing shallow but even. The Doctor removed the head piece from him and scanned him. "Completely human." he announced with no fanfare.

Martha sat on the chair with Addy in her arms, she had not let go of his little frame in three hours, and even though her arms were starting to cramp, she would not let go of him for another three

XXXXXXXXXX

By the time she made it home to their flat in Manchester, Martha was as bone tired as she had been after a day in Farmingham. Living lies was always harder when you were the only one who knew the truth.

The sound of piano playing spilled into the hall way, it was enough of Mozart's Piano Concerto #15 to make her smile. He always played Mozart in the evening, but Martha wondered if it was a coincidence that it was her favorite piece. Did she like John Bowman any better than John Smith? Yes, he was peaceful, loving and kind with a serious streak. He was a professor of music at a small college, nothing like the stuffy and pompous creature he had been in Farmingham. The Doctor chose the last name, said it would illicit trust. "I don't ever want to be John Smith again," he had insisted that day with the Arch sitting on his head. ""I never want to hurt you again like that, or any other way for that matter. Bowman, he was there, that day. Saved you, saved Addy. Maybe, with a little luck, a name like that will remind me not to be so full of myself. "

He had the infant carrier on top of the piano, Martha advanced upon them, she watched for a time his beautiful hands playing over the keyboard. She stood in the doorway between the foyer and the living room where the upright piano stood. She loved watching him play, and was surprised at how human it was to see him play piano. There was a disconnect, watching him play music that was so human, yet knowing that he was not really from this planet. She wondered if it was something he acquired during the procedure, or had he always been able to play. It was his favorite thing, she could tell, to play for the baby. It kept him quiet and soothed the colic that Adric had somehow developed.

He turned, sensing her presence, and the look of joy on his face made Martha glad to be home. "You're back." he announced happily. He stood and removed Addy from his carrier. He waved Addy's hand "Say hello to Mum, she has been out fighting the good fight, keeping the world safe from Measles, Mumps and auto crashes. How was your first day back?"

"They were holding all the weirdoes until I got back." she smiled. "How was he today?"

"On a scale of one to ten? He was Sousa." He placed Addy in her arms and kissed her on the mouth. "I made dinner.' he turned and headed toward the kitchen.

"Sorry," she said, and actually meant it. Her once quiet baby had turned into a fussy, erratic nightmare that she once would have blamed the parent's for at the Tesco. She was that parent now, and whether she could blame herself or the Doctor, she wasn't sure. Yet. Martha took the opportunity to let out the breath she had been holding since the kiss.

"Oh, Addy we are in so much trouble. " she nuzzled him close to her and kissed his neck.

XXX

"Jack called, wanted you to call him and tell him all about your first day back."

"I bet he did." she smiled.

John shook his head. "It's not like that, Martha. My cousin hasn't had a crush on you since the wedding."

"That's what he wants you to think." Martha smiled, she took another large spoonful of the stew that John had placed in front of her. "This is sooo good."

He smiled back at her, and Martha was struck again by how handsome he was. "My sister will be glad to hear it." John believed that he had been raised by his sister, that their parents died when he was terribly young and Sarah Jane left University to care or him. Martha liked Sara Jane, she was very practical and thorough in dealing with the situation. Martha had wondered why the Tardis had landed them on a small suburban street. She had been sure they would have been spit out in the center of the Torchwood Hub.

But, Sarah Jane ad been waiting for them, she said that her Mr. Smith had sent a message. Sarah Jane helped Martha get the nearly comatose pair out of the ship and into her house. By the time that the Doctor, now John Bowman, had come around, he was apologizing for having fallen asleep on her loveseat.

It was Jack who had done all the hard work. When Martha Jack he flew into action. The Doctor had the good sense to sleep for twenty four hours, enough time for Jack and Sarah to pull together a life. They were on their way back to Manchester. Martha worked their for the last three years, but John had spent the last three years traveling and playing concerts. He finally decided to settle down when Adric was born two months ago, and had found a position as an adjunct professor.

Within three hours, Jack had photos, documents, NHS cards, and even a half dozen pictures and press releases for John's small musical tour. Martha was so impressed, she kissed him on the cheek. It was the first time she ever saw Jack blush.

But, as they stood in their too small kitchen a week later she washing and he drying, Martha wondered if this was going to eventually turn around and bite her in the ass.

"You seem distracted." he said.

Martha nodded. "Just work, nothing too complicated." She lied. Martha swore he was about to contradict her assurances when her phone rang. She looked at the name and raised a finger. "Jack? Yeh. It's good, no my phone doesn't work in the tube." she moved toward the back of the large flat and into the back bathroom.

"How is it going, Nightingale?" Jack purred from the other end.

She sighed and sat on the toilet seat. "I don't know how long I can do this." she admitted.

"Oh, you'll be all right. Domestic. I gotta have tons of pictures for late."

"You are a prig, Jack. And I find nothing of this remotely humorous. You should be ashamed of yourself, my son is in real danger here. We all may be."

"Still," Jack argued, but the smile left his tone. "All right, I am coming out there for the weekend. I expect to have some sort of homey setting there."

"You can expect all you like. I don;t know how long this farce is going to hold up." She let her head drop into her free hand. "It's never going to work."

"You can make it work, Martha." Jack insisted. "And, I can help a bit. John seems to recall not being there for Adric's birth-"

"Yeah, its amazing the things that emerge, innit?" she smiled.

"That can work to our advantage. Listen, as far as John knows, its only been 6 weeks since you gave birth. So, just claim no medical clearance for take off."

"That is only going to work for so long." she whined, hating the sound of her own pitiful voice.

"We'll cross that bridge this weekend. You leave that to me."

"Thanks, Jack."

John was just finishing the clean up when she came back into the kitchen. "Jack all right?" he asked. "Still coming up for the weekend?"

"So far, but you know, Jack, there may be a work crisis or a brunette crisis that may divert him from Manchester."

John smiled. "I doubt it, he loves Adric. Been wanting to see him for a while."

"He saw him last week." Martha corrected, momentarily worried that The Doctor's brain had suffered some sort of crisis from the Chameleon Arch.

Then, John smiled shyly, sitting down at the piano he began to finger a few keys nervously "Ok then, maybe that crush hasn't quite abated yet." he turned his eyes to meet Martha's "But he is completely harmless, I swear it."

It was apparent that even John knew that Jack was coming to see her. Ever the observant one, even as a human, Martha really began to feel a nervousness about the entire thing.

As if he read her mind, he began to play that piece again, pouring his heart into it. She was drawn to sit beside him, her head against his shoulder.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Their bedroom was a tasteful homage to IKEA. Martha placed Adric in his cot at the foot of their bed and began to change into her pajamas. John entered halfway through, if he was surprised at Martha's modesty at his entrance, he did not let it show. "Is he sleeping?" John asked looking in on the baby in the cot.

"You can see that yourself," she fired, annoyed that she had to continue changing in front of him.

"You know, he had a perfectly good bedroom." John offered.

"Really?" Martha answered. "Look, he's only six weeks, and I will feel a whole lot better with him in here, at least for a while longer, yeah?"

"Til when? High school. That could get a bit...homicidal murderish." he smiled and moved to sit on the bed and began to take off his clothes. "I just miss it being...just us." he turned and eyed her over his shoulder.

She smiled back at him innocently. The man on the bed took a deep sigh and crawled into his side of the bed in just his underwear.

Turned out, as Martha learned on their first night in the flat. "He loved to cuddle. Sometimes she wondered about his complete turn abouts when he was human, as if he were reading some manual on how to be the opposite of yourself to really confuse the hell outta Martha. Still, it felt good when he turned on his side to face her, his arms reaching out across the distance to her. When he placed his hands over her head, and his head next to hers, something about it felt. Right. In her mind, she went over the last fifteen minutes of sentience fo the Doctor, before the screaming had started. It had become a favorite pass time for her in the last week, trying to play arm chair time traveler, at what point could she had ended this?

Tonight, it was the same time it had been, the time when she asked the right questions at the wrong time.

It was right after Adric had finally gone limp in her arms that she had the guts to ask. Not that it wasn't too late by then, but it was a confirmation of what she needed to hear. There was no turning back, she knew that, there was no where else for them to go, perhaps, looking back, it was why she asked then instead of in the beginning. If she had asked sooner, she may have done something stupid like stay on Lagos and put everyone in danger.

While he slept in her arms, Martha asked the question she had been afraid to ask. "In this nightmare," she began tentatively. "Where are we?"

He poked around the settings while he spoke. "Present Day, Manchester, far enough from London to not cause any trouble. I think a bigger city will be better. Sort of blending in, urban camouflage I think the American Military calls it. Although, I don't see-"

"No, that's not what I meant." she shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut against the onslaught. "I meant, where will we be, to each other."

She noticed he was stricken then, writers often used the term a cloud had passed over someone features. It was the perfect description for what was dancing across the Doctor's face then.

"I assumed we would be married." he said finally.

Martha shook her head. "Wrong assumption."

He nodded then, "Martha,, I can sit here and make promises to you seven ways to Beruvaliean Sunday, and believe you me, that is a long time. The truth is, when I wake up, and I see you, it will be as my wife. I have no way to overwrite that."

She nodded then. "Not what I bargained for." she admitted.

"It never is," The Doctor had answered and flipped the switch. His screams drowning out any further argument on her part.


	7. We'll Build Ourselves A House

**Thanks so much to all of you following and reading this story. I am enjoying writing them domestic, something i never get to do. Ih, and to al of you who have reviewed, i cannot tell you enough how much i love reading your thoughts on my thoughts; so amazing guys. You all rock!**

It was his most peaceful retreat, in front of his piano. John allowed his mind to wander as his fingers played over the keys effortlessly. Every note was a caress, every rest a moment frozen forever in time. He didn't. It was surreal his enjoyment of his chosen path.

The phone next to him rang and the sudden cessaton of music as he reached for te phone next to him was a surprise to his senses, and his young son, who began to fuss from his perch atop the piana.

"I know Addy, I hate it too." he patted the baby before clicking the little green button without checking the caller ID.

"You all right?" Martha asked.

He smiled at hearing her voice. It was almost embarrassing how she made him feel. "Same old life." he answered with a quirk. There was a memr in there somewhere, a recall of something that he had said to someone once. It made her laugh.

"Well, I would have to disagree with that, lots has changed in the past couple of weeks."

"Months," e corrected automatically."

"Yeah, months. Listen, I won;t be home until late. Jack needs me to pick him up at the airport. You all right for dinner on your own?"

John fiddled with Adric's foot as the baby kicked his legs in frustration. "Pretty sure I can feed myself, and there is plenty of the good stuff for the alien." It was a joke he had started, though he wasn't sure where it came from.

Martha made an odd sound from her end of the phone, "If you're tired, I can pick him up" John added hearing the strain in her voice. "Just come on home early."

"No, I have the car, and its n my way." she sighed. "No reason to disrupt both of us."

He nodded, the thing about his wife, she was pretty self contained. It was the thing that had drawn him to her when they first met. He had dated plenty of women that needed looking after, attracted to his looks and his talent, but they needed more from him than he could offer. Martha never needed that, and in some ways, he wished she did. "Well, if you're sure." He paused before speaking. "I love you."

But, she hung up before he could get a response. It was always that way, Martha never confired anything that he was willing to offer. He supposed it was her way, but he was beginning to wonder if there was something he had done somewhere, that he had forgotten about.

He'd had a brain infection recently, encephalitis, right after Adric was born. He recalled having been in hospital for a time, and it left him fuzzy on a few things. His memory wasn;t what it had once been, he was sure of that. Fortunately, music was more instinct to him than memory.

Adric's name, he remembered, was a family name, a brother he had lost when his parents died in that fiery blast. A memory of loss, of utter and total loss. Of somehow being responsible for it, for having killed his own family.

It made him shudder in it's intensity, and John reached for his small son and held him close as if in need of that reassurance of having something left, something remained.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Well, look at that," the tall man with the Midwestern accent announced with a low whistle. "Its like you jumped and landed into the Twilight Zone out here." he grinned big as Martha led him the Honda parked in short term parking.

"Not funny Jack, believe me the Twilight Zone would be a hell of a lot easier than dealing with him like that." they got into the car and pointed toward the modest neighborhood that Jack had set them up in.

Jack seemed concerned all at once. "Is he difficult?" he wanted to know. "A jerk? Does he leave the cap off the toothpaste?" Jack's eyes bugged cartoonishly. "Is he a deviant?"

Martha shoved him playfully, a smile dancing across her lips. "this is serious, Jack. You saw what he was like, all nice and sweet and thoughtful. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?"

Jack sighed, "You complained when he was angry, dishonest, and untrustworthy. See, this si why men complain about what you women want. Not me, of course. I know what you want. Usually, its me.'

Martha rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Just, give me a hand, yeah? I don;t think I can...perform."

He placed his hand on hers, but the gesture belied the smile in his eyes. "I didn;t know you two hadn't..."

"No!" Martha answered too quickly. "No, nothing of that sort. It's not like that, for us. "

"There is no reason why it shouldn't be." Jack nodded.

"I can think of several." martha fired back. "And, anyway, even if it was, Jack. The man he is now, its not the same. He's not the Doctor."

"he has to be in there somewhere. I have a hard time believing he could completely bury his personality inside, all that fire and rage and brains. Even with all that, something of himself will bleed through."

"You weren't there in Farmingham." she answered.

"I read the Torchwood reports." he paused to allow the surprise to sink in. "C'mon Nightiingale, did you think something that freaky would go down without there being a trail of witnesses? Not to mention the Crown wanting to find out how much Sir Doctor of TARDIS had to do with it all."

Martha nodded, falling silent for a time before speaking. "Then you know," she spoke while maneuvering through the darkened late fall streets of Manchester. "About Nurse Redfern, about how much of a Prig he was the last time."

"Something bled through." Jack repeated. "He always has had a thing with blonds."

"Don't I know it. But, this time," Martha shook her head and looked out the window as the came to the driveway of their Duplex. "This time, it's different. In some ways, it's much worse."

He was waiting at te door as they exited the car. Jack ran and gave him a hug that lifted the taller man off the ground. He even swung him around for good measure. Martha smiled at Jack's flirting, even if John could not tell it for what it was.

"Jack! You idiot, put me down, I am still healing from the infection." John scolded, but laughed none the less at the man's actions.

"Where's that cousin of mine? The one I came here to see. Want to make sure you two have been taking proper care of him. " The trio stepped into the foyer of the flat, as usual, Adric sat atop the piano in his high chair, cooing at the new arrivals.

"He's gonna get a nose bleed sitting up there. " Jack spoke as he removed Adric and took hold of him. Adric immediately let out a howl in answer. "He doesn't like me." Jack pouted, handing him over to Martha.

"No," John righted as he sat at the piano bench. "Addy has colic, the only thing he seems to like is Mozart." John began to play another concerto, Martha wasn't sure which one it was, but it sounded familiar.

The three of them listened to John's playing, Jack seated himself in Martha's usual place next to John on the piano bench, while Martha sat on the sofa feeding a suddenly quieted Adric. John played the same way each time, Martha mused as she listened raptly. There was an intensity to his playing,, as if he was playing for his life. Even playful tunes he sometimes twiddled were full of that odd fire, and it made her wonder if Jack wasn't right; something maybe truly had bled through.

XXXXXXXXXX

"So, she has you cooking and staying home with the kid?" Jack cast a knowing look at Martha across the dining table.. "wow, she really has trained you well."

"Oh, I wasn't that far off, Jack, you know that. After Mum and Dad died, I had to look after myself quite a bit. How else was Sarah Jane able to go to college and do all that traveling?"

Martha and Jack traded looks while John spoke. "I am perfectly happy taking care of Addy."

"I love that nick name." Jack raised his eyebrow."

"You should, you gave it to him." John answered. They sat around the oval dining room table in the room off the kitchen. Martha loved John's cooking, and could not help but wonder if that too was something else that had bled through.

Jack cocked his head and gave Martha a look, who in turn smiled and shook her head. Some things were better left to not knowing. "Well, it's a good one still the same. "

They finished dinner and sat in the living room talking like old friends. "I always wondered what suburban hell looked like. "Jack laughed. He held the baby who had finally given over to being handled by him. For a long time, the two month old just stared at the American man with curiosity.

John reclined on the couch with his head in Martha's lap She could not help but toy with his hair as the three of them caught up. Jack had studied the pair from his vantage point, but decided to steer the conversation away from anything about their marriage. For now. "How are you holding up anyway, John? No headaches or lasting effects of the encephalitis?"

Martha could feel John tense under Jack's innocent question. She wondered if there was something about the whole thing that bothered him, was the story that the TADIS had built in his head not enough to mask the alien underneath? "Still a lot of memory loss," he answered wistfully. "Things are fuzzy, hazy even. I don't know if its going to be long term or not. Suppose I should ask the neurologist at the next visit, shouldn't I?" his eyes traveled to the ceiling. "What I want is to be able to remember.'

"You didn't tell me it was so difficult for you, " Martha realized he wasn't telling her everything. That bleeding though again.

But, John shook his head. :You have had a difficult pregnancy, a gut wrenching delivery. I didin;t want to add to it. " he said honestly. "But, I am telling you now. There are things that I don;t remember.'

Jack placed Adric into the playpen, he then squatted beside the reclining John Bowman and ruffled his brown hair. "So, let's find out what you do remember? See if we can fill in some of the blanks. At least, between the three of us here, yeah?"

John seemed unmoved for a minute, then his face broke into the most beautific smile that artha had ever seen on the Time Lord. He looked up at Martha, who smiled and nodded in agreement. "Well, where should we start?"

Jack wisely halted the idea of anything too early. Instead, he thought it would be better to build a base on where they stood. "Well, let's start with something easy. Where did you meet Martha?"

John's smile came bigger and brighter then, he sat up a little, still reclining on Martha. "That's easy, we met at hospital." he nodded. "Three years ago. In the A and E at..." John's expression scrunched as he considered the memory. "Royal Hope, in London."

Martha ruffled his hair vigorously, "that's right!" she said. "What else do you recall?" Martha chanced a quick look at Jack who nodded knowingly.

"You were still in training, I had come in for stomach trouble. You listened to my hearts...heart." he gave a funny face to no one in particular. "Heart."

Jack through his head back and laughed. "She's been listening to it ever since, hasn't she?"

John turned again to look on his wife. "I suppose she has." he nodded. "But, for some reason, the memory gets a little strange, I recall rhinoceroses and throwing rocks on the moon." He shool his head. "Why would I recall something like that?"

"Memory is a funny thing, love." Martha soothed. "It's possible you had a dream at some point like that, and during your time in the hospital last month, it got all tangled up with reality."

John sighed " I remember our first date was at the Globe theater." he went on. "We saw Love's Labour Found and we...Hang on, there is no Love's Labour Found. What did we see? And why do I recall witches?"

Jack laughed and Martha tried to hide her panic in light tones. "It was a Halloween matinee. There were fireworks and costumes," she laughed and added, "Fr a moment there, I thought you were going to mention my mum/"

He recoiled in mock horror, "No, but the first time she met me, she slapped me." he smiled and rubbed his hand over his cheek. "She packs a wallop."

The three of them shared a laugh, "Maybe not too much now, we can do more tomorrow." Jack nodded.

Wait," he turned to Martha. "Did I have a heart attack at the Globe?"

"Heart _burn_," Martha finished. "Too much Halloween candy. I warned you to slow down."

"Jelly babies! " John announced with a nod. "How can anything with a name like that be abd for you?" John jumped to standing suddenly. "But, I am worn out. " he stretched for effect. "Seems like I need a lot more sleep than I remember since the infection."

He held his hand out, but Martha shook her head. "I'll be in in a minute, I need to get some of the stuff put away in the kitchen." She stood and made for the room she intended to straighten before bed. Jack followed as John disappeared into the bathroom.

"It's weird, isn't it?" Martha whispered as the friends worked in tandem, "what he remembers and what he does not. It may be too much.'

But, Jack shook his head. "I think its what he needs to recall Martha." At her disbelieving glare from the counter he went on. "Think about it, you two are going to be here for a year and a half, he has to recall your marriage and relationship as something. The TARDIS made sure that would happen by capitalizing on the memories he already has of the two of you together."

Martha understood most of it. The idea that this was so important, that the ancient ship made certain his memories of her were tied to something, not some made up stories, rather half truths bound them together. If he asked her about some event in their lives togetehr, she could give a reasonable, if not watered down, version of it to keep him safe. To keep Addy safe. In her room, in a box of her things were a sonic screwdriver and two old fob watches. A smaller one for Addy. "This is going to have to be over quick."

Jack came and put his arms around his friend as she did dishes. He had every reason to believe that this was as hard for her as he could read on her features. "Martha, for whatever happens, think of the big picture. Remember why this is so important. "

"I should have left him on Sarah Jane's doorstep." she whispered.

"And he would have torn aside all of Britain looking for you. You know I'm right. Not to mention what it would have done to you. Both of you."

Dishes done, Martha gave her friend a hug, showed him where the extra blankets were, and

bid him good night. She knew Jack didn't sleep, but with te right amount of porn, he would be all right til morning.

XXXXXXXXXX

He'd made himself comfortable on the bed in the baby's room. Their two bedroom flat was a nice one, and Jack patted himself on the back for being so good at what he did. The flat was a perfect foil in a nice neighborhood for a young couple. It was a brilliant job done in a very little time.

He was almost ready to open his file of Hentai for the first round when the knock on the door came. John appeared in the door frame in a pair of sweats and a T shirt. In one hand he held a bottle of Captain Morgan's; two Solo cups clutched precariously in the other. "What's up Doc?" Jack asked with a private smile.

"No reason, I seem to recall you and I going drinking a few times. I thought, well maybe even though I am tied down and boring now, I can still have a shot or two with my favorite cousin."

Jack said nothing, just fired back at John a piercing and persistently expectant, glare.

John shrugged his shoulders and sat down next to his cousin. "There were things I don;t really recall, that I did not want to ask in front of Martha." he admitted.

"You safe to drink that?" jack asked, not wanting to go to any emergency rooms where too many questions or too persistent a physician might cause him to order a round of Retcon on the house.

"I'm clear, no meds for a week now. Since Sarah Jane's"

Jack moved over to one side of the bed as John sat cross-legged next to him. "What did you want to know.'

"Oh," he sighed. "This and that. I have a feeling there are things that I recall that might be a bit jumbled up, but I get the feeling that my wife isn't at all happy with me lately. She talks to you a lot, I was wondering if you could clue me into what I did wrong."

"I didn't know you had done anything wrong..." Jack hemmed, trying to stall for an answer. There could be any number of things. He had gone from congratulating himself on a job well done, to wishing he had moved them closer. This was going to turn into a huge mess if he didin't get a hold on things, starting with Martha.

John allowed his body to slump against the side of the bed. "She keeps me at arm's length. She talks to me, sleeps next to me, but it feels like I am in this alone. I mean, I know there is an age difference between us-"

"You have no idea," Jack muttered quietly.

"...but that's can;t be it. Tell me about my life Jack, the things I don;t recall are killing me." John took a shuddering breath. "God I sound so pathetic. I should have known better, it nevr fairs well for a man to marry some chippie younger than him."

"Stop right there, Johnny Cakes." jack warned. "Martha is no chippie, for one." he waited until he saw John give a distinct set of slow nods. "Secondly,, she loves you. I know this for a fact. Believe me I questioned it like you did, given the history." he sighed.

"That is what I mean, Jack. Given what history?"

"What do you want to know, John. What can I enlighten you on?"

"Well, for starters," John paused as if trying to gain strength to go on. "I need to know what I have done wring, and why that seems to be tied to one person."

"One person? You mean Martha?" Jack asked.

John shook his head as he took a big slug of rum. "No, I need to know about the blonde. Who's Rose?"


	8. There's No Safety

Jack took a long swig straight from the bottle of Captain Morga's rum. He parried a look next to him at the stricken man, and took another long swig. "That." he said, pointing the bottle at Johnn for clarity. "Is a blast from the past."

"Is it?" John asked, taking the bottle from Jack and similarly foregoing the red solo cup at his feet. "Is it the past, Jack? Cause, I gotta tell you, my wife seems to be angry at me about something, and that name and face keep popping up at the end of each of my questions."

Jack nodded. "I still recall when I met her." Jack nodded.

"Was she dating a bouncer?"John asked with a questioning tilt of his head.

Jack nearly spit out his mouthful of rum at that question. "No, no." he took a long low sigh and ran his hands through his hair. "Listen, Doc." he began."Rose was someone you met at a time in your life where things were...not so great."

"I know that," John nodded. "And I know that this Rose," John said her name as if it left a sour taste in his mouth. "Is what sits between us."

"Maybe," Jack drawled, "you should talk to Martha about it. She is a smart rational woman, I am sure that she would have a better handle on things like that than me." Jack smiled.

"I don;t know." John looked at his watch, took one last long pull from the rum bnpttle and stood up shakily. "S'pose I should go to bed, I told her I wasn;t going to be too late."

Jack tipped the bottle toward his friend in a gesture of good night, he watched the taller man tip out of the room with the aid of his hands on the walls of the small bedroom. Once he was certain that John was out of earshot, he shook his head and blew a breath. "Geez, I gotta stop this train before it reaches the station."

XXXXXXXXXX

Martha was making pancakes when Jack climbed out of his hole the next morning, beautiful." he smiled.

"You are in much better shape than your com padre." Martha accused. "You know he hasn;t drank before like this." she waved the spatula in her hand.

Jack sat at the small round table in the kitchen. "When you get a chance, Martha..." he started carefully. Jack had decided during the night, that he would stem the flow of this before it went bad. They had been here on Earth for two weeks, and if the Doctor could tell something was wrong in that amount of time, then something was definitely going to bubble over and surface within Eighteen Months. He was sure he could take John in, or even Sarah. But, in what shape would the non human human be in? Did the Doctor harbour a suicidal tendency in this human shape? He didn't want to find out the hard way.

Martha turned to face her one time boss. "What? What is it?" she asked. Martha had angled her body away from the cast iron griddle. "What did he say to you last night?"

Jack wondered how much of her reaction was guilt, she seemed in flight or flight mode. He started to doubt there was much he could do at this point. "I think you need to have a talk with your husband." Jack insisted.

"He's not my..." Martha's words fell into silence. Something seemed to catch, she turned slowly back to the action of flipping silver dollar pancakes. Jack could have sworn he co\aught something in her eyes, before she turned around, there was a moment of understanding.

"Martha, it's not going to work," Jack shook his head. "There is no way you can keep this up for a year and a half. " he shook his head. Again.

"This is a mess."she announced without turning back around.

"What's a mess?" John entered holding Adric. Martha had noticed in the last week how much more time he spends with the infant than he did as himself. He seemed almost proprietary of the baby.

Martha turned and found herself folding him into a hug. "We were discussing your memories, John. " She answered proud of herself for only half lying to him.

He nodded and allowed her to hold him. Adric fussed and drew them apart to stare at the infant. "He's hungry." Martha announced with a nod.

"I'll finish breakfast." John offered taking the proffered spatula.

XXXXXXXXXX

He was starting to feel like he was in an episode of wild kingdom. Jack kept watching to \\he couple wondering where the lie began and the truth ended. On the surface, and even sub subcutaneously, they seemed loving, nearly ideal. But, the causal observer, after five minutes, would have to concede a sense of oddness in their movements. Martha fed Adric, and John made breakfast. They were together and separate, as if two objects occupying the same space at different times; grudgingly admitting that each holds a right to exist, but not giving any inclination of coexistence.

After breakfast, John grabbed the car keys and left to run errands, promising to pick up movies for later. Jack helped Martha move the stroller out onto the front and the two of them took a walk in the chilly early November air. "Even when you try, Martha," Jack began unable to look at her as he spoke. "Its still so forced. "

Martha nodded, there was nothing else for it, no way to admit that this was a complete failure. She did not do failure well, even when it took her three times to pass Greek in her senior year of high school.

"He knows it's wrong, even asked about Rose last night." he watched the woman at his side go rigid with the mention of the name. "I would have thought that you two worked out your differences by now. I don't get it, Nightingale, when you left a few weeks ago, I thought for sure that the two of you were on your way to something great."

"Well, it must be wonderful to be able to put together great romances for everyone else." Martha spat bitterly.

Jack stopped walking and placed his hand on her arm. "What is it? I mean really, Martha? Have you ever, in all this time figured that part out?" he asked. When Martha shrugged her shoulders and shook her head, he pressed on. "You used to be so in awe of him. That first time I met you, I could tell. Even in the face of the end of the Universe, I could see it. " It was as if a light came on above his head. The colors ran from Martha's face, and he finally understood it. "It really is still Rose, isn't it?"

Martha spoke this time, and for the first time, she gave her friend an honest and true answer. "I have met that girl, she is nothing to get anyone's hopes up on." Martha shook her head again. "No, it isn't about Rose, it never was."

"Then what is it?" jack asked, he believed her, believed that she had worked through at least the Rose part of her insecurities. But, there was something there, and Jack doubted she would give it a name until she was ready to. She wasn't. Martha shook her head and continued to walk along side the immortal man. "All I'm saying, Martha." he began again, reluctant to dig too deep. "Is that if this isn't what you want, and you know you can't fake it, then its better to get out as soon as possible." He could not believe he was saying these words, giving his friend the advice. But, she was one to leave the Doctor before. He wondered if she would be able to do it again, and Jack also wondered if Martha realized how hard it would be.

Martha sighed. "You have to understand, Jack. I spent a year living with him, completely in awe of him, but he seemed to not even know I existed."

"He does now." Jack tried.

"That is circumstantial, isn't it?" Martha answered. "Had it not been for Adric, l do you really think any of this would have gone any further?"

"Yes," Jack answered truthfully. "Yes I do."

"No, sorry don't buy it, Jack'" she fired back. "you wouldn't understand it. No one has ever made you feel like their mistress."

Jack laughed. "I don't think you have the proper definition of that word. See, a mistress gives a married man sexual-"

"I know what it is!" Martha snarled. "It's the unnecessary part of the feeling I don't like." She shook her head at Jack's confused grin. "A mistress, a man can do without. Don;t look at me like that, Jack, you forget my father was infatuated with a blond. "

"You know, I forgot about that. It all sort of makes chaotic sense." he nodded to himself.

"It's funny, a man does not need a mistress. Oh, he likes to have one strangely enough, loves to have her around mostly for his own ego. But, he does not need her. And, however she may feel about him, however much she may love him, he will never love her the same way he loves the idea of her."

Jack shook his head. "That is not true, Martha. I know what you are implying, and its not true."

"Doesn't have to be," Martha shrugged her shoulders, but stood up a little taller nonetheless. "It's how I feel. And, as long as the Doctor is someone I do not know, that is never going to get settled. We gave ourselves one year to try...it wasn't bad for that first few weeks..." Martha's voice seemed to fade out, then it came stronger. "Then, this happened. Right when things were actually getting better. There was a trust that we were starting to come to. I could rely on him, and he knew I was at least trying. We had a deal, and this feels like."

"Like he took the easy way out of it." Jack finished. "But you know that is not true, right?"

"Doesn't matter what is true or not, Jack." Martha repeated. "It's what I feel that is messing with my head. Its not like I cannot think rationally about all of this. I do nothing but work and think rationally about this. But, thinking rationally is different than trying to control emotions, isn't it?

"Which is why you need to hag it up,Martha. You're miserable, he's miserable. It can't be good." He stopped again and took Martha's hand in his. "Why don't you come back to Cardiff." he asked.

"You were the one that chased me out a few weeks ago!" Martha insisted. "You made me leave."

Jack threw his head back and laughed. "No one makes you do anything, Martha. I just made it easier for you to go with a clear conscience." Jack shrugged. "But, if it makes you feel better this time, I can even put you back into the field."

She seemed to honestly be considering her options silently.. Martha's face became unreadable as they made their way to the busy center of their suburb. "I don't think I can." Martha nodded finally.

"Really?" Jack asked, "Are you sure?"

She sighed then. "I can't because I can't leave Adric. A job like that, I would need a lot of sitters, not to mention my mother being so far away, and we barely on speaking terms as it is..."

Jack watched his friend grasp her hands on the stroller tighter and hunch her shoulders until they were a solid quadrilateral. "I neer thought it would be like this for me. I love him, Jack. Addy, I can;t leave him, and I can;t take him away from the Doctor. Have you seen him with Addy?"

Jack nodded.

"Martha," he shook his head. "Just let me know if you ever need the out, all right?"

Martha nodded distractedly, a plan already taking shape in her mind.

XXXXXXXXXX

The rest of the weekend wet by quickly as the three friends spent hours talking and doing their best to avoid the five hundred pound baby elephant in the room. John still sat next to Martha, though the distance between them could have rivaled the Grand Canyon. Jack felt powerles sto help an already untenable situation. He wanted to smack both of his friends and lock them in a room together, preferably naked. Something about nature taking its course, and the two of them would feel a lot better with a good healthy shag between them.

But, real life did not work that way, and two people hurting on opposite end s of the couch were never going to see anything eye to eye long enough to shag.

Sunday found Jack standing in the rain outside of departures, John sat in the car with the Honda idling while Martha gave her friend one last hug. "Think about what I said, Martha." he tried again. "Either talk to him, or get out. You can't go on like this, neither of you." Martha nodded and watched him disappear into security.

John smiled as she eased into the passenger seat of the car, he always seemed so happy to see her; it was the thing that struck her every time. Not the happy to see her, the Doctor was capable of that, but the other emotions, the other oh so human and categorical emotions that were so starkly contrasted against John Smith, and against the Doctor. "Everything all right?" he asked. Martha noted he asked that a lot. She nodded all the same and settled into her seat, with a quick glance back at Addy, they pulled into Manchester traffic and pointed home.

"It's not about Rose, you know." she said low as they drove the rain soaked streets.

John nodded without turning to look at her. "I know."

Martha sighed. "It's in the past, I would rather not dredge up all of that, right?" she asked. "I mean, it was a long time ago, and..." Martha shook her head.

"I don't remember." he announced. John slammed his hand on the steering wheel as they idled at the red light. "I don't remember! I mean, I feel as if I am being punished for something I didin't do!" His voice was angry, but not loud. Martha noted his face bore the cadence of confusion, in that moment she felt sorry for him. She wondered if this was also a carry over from his real persona. Did he feel punished?

John gripped the steering wheel with both hands until his knuckles were white. "Rose wasn't who I married." he insisted fervently. "Why is this still hovering over our heads after three years of marriage and a baby?" He looked at her them, as if she had an answer. She didin;t

"I don't know." she shrugged, then turned to look out of the window. "It still feels raw and open like a scab that was ripped open."

he turned at the raw emotion in her voice. "What happened?" he asked quietly as they pulled onto their street. Martha shook her head, but neither of them made a move to get out of the car after John threw the trans into park and sat back. "I have a right to know why my wife hates me." he sighed.

"I don;t hate you," she whispered. "I just don't trust you."

He shook his head this time. "No, I don't suppose you do, do you.' he sighed with resignation. "Can you at least tell me what happened?" He turned to face her, his face drawn in a mask of self disgust. "Did I cheat?"

Martha shook her head faintly. "No, you have never cheated on me." she smiled. "It's not like that. Rose was something special to you. Someone special to you." She took a deep breath before going on. "You and she were intensely close. She was everything to you. And, she left. "

"Did she die?" He asked, wondering why he would have felt for someone he remembers nothing of, but the feelings for the woman next to him...oh the feelings. Apple flavored kisses, a first kiss in the halls of a hospital amid the smell of camphor and disinfectant. A shared love for Shakespeare, a long traffic jam where they had a fight and she ran off in anger. He followed her for an hour. He remembered so much. Of Rose...

"She died. But, that came later. "Martha felt suffocatingly close in the luxury car. Every cell in her screamed to open the car door and run for the house, pack a bag and run. She was a good runner, had been since she could remember. Running was better than fighting, that she did not have in her. At least, not for this. "You never let me forget her. We met, not long after she left you. I don;t know the ins and outs of your relationship, and its too late to ask her." Martha let her hands rub over her eyes before turning to make sure that the infant in the back seat was still sleeping. "You were still hurting when we met that day at Royal Hope. It was love at first sight for me, but I think you were just looking for a lie vest to keep from drowning. I suppose I threw myself at you a bit." she smiled sadly.

John shook his head. "That, is not what I recall." he reached his hand to her, considered touching her cheek,, but took her hand instead. "I may still be under the influence of the Encephalitis, but I know I wasn't thinking of anyone else." He settled back into the car seat, "when I think of Rose," he began, but halted at Martha's visible discomfort. "When I think of Rose, all I get is pink and yellow and sweet, like a mixed drink at a resort. I don;t understand how a good time could mean anything."

"You were always comparing us." Martha fired with a defiant shake of her head. "I don;t know why I stuck around so long...You were always going on about how much she meant to you, how perfect she was. I hated her for a long time. Still do, but for different reasons now." Martha smiled ruefully. "When she came back to you, you were such a fool for her. Didn't matter what she did, or, who she did it to, she was all you could see. All you wanted to see."

He sat in silent shame. While he was not certain of the validity of his wife's accusations, he could not den the probable truth.

"Fact is," she surmised with a sad smile.. "I always felt, unnecessary. You were already in love, I was the consolation prize.'

It was the first time he ever really showed real anger toward her in the three weeks they had been 'undercover.' Martha had never feared the Doctor, and she had only feared for John Smith, but in the instant after her accusation, she actually feared John Bowman. "How can you say that?" he asked bitterly.

She shrugged sadly, "I just think I need some time away, John. I don;t think this is a good situation for either of us. Some time apart might be good. I was thinking of taking another job, in London. Give you and Addy some time..."

"But," he began in a small voice, the smallest voice that Martha had ever heard come from anyone "You said a year, you promised."


	9. And There's Nobody To Blame

**Greetings from the Desert. Sorry this took so long, back to work and all that. Thanks for the support, it means a lot to me. **

She turned to look at him slowly, struck dumb by his words. "What?" she said, but had to stop herself from finishing with the word Doctor.

"I remember." he spoke, but his eyes had gone back to looking out of the window ahead of him. "After Adric. You said a year. That we would give it a year." he nodded robotically.

"I don't-"

"You did, we were having troubles, but I thought." He gulped audibly. "I thought we were going to try to work things out. You said you would. You said not to have expectations. The only expectation I had were that we would try."

She nodded. "I didn't think it would be so hard," she shook her head. Martha wished she could say more, but the words seemed hollow, he wasn't the same man. "I don't think either of us should expect this to be fixed after only a couple of months." Martha had to pull herself together, she felt thrust into a situation that she had no control over, and in a lot of ways, she supposed he was as well. Maybe this is what it would take to be able for both of them to walk away clean, to get out of the mess that was created over a year ago. "I wanted this to work but-"

"You did!" he shouted suddenly, the sound of his voice cause Adric to scream suddenly. Martha took that opportunity to open the car door, she removed Adric from his seat and headed for the house.

She reached the front door of the house, only then remembering that she had left her purse and keys in the car in her rush to gt away. Adric was in full tilt, as she shifted him to return to the car, John came to her elbow, he held her purse in one hand, and opened the front door with the other.

The cool of their apartment hit her as she pushed the door closed behind her. John placed her purse on the couch and sat at the piano. In their bedroom, Martha sat on the bed to nurse Adric. The day had faded into late evening, and she did not relish the idea of going to work in the morning. It wasn't that she was lazy, Martha Jones had never been that, but she had never really practiced the type of medicine that she did now at Queen's Corner Hospital. She was more than qualified for the job, perhaps too qualified. Last week, while bandaging a football Mum's knee, Martha found herself wishing for a hostile alien takeover, or some blood born pathogen of questionable origin. Then, she hated herself realizing that people would die, and her current job as an ER nurse wielded nothing more dangerous than the occasional

She hated herself for becoming that person.

He came to the door of the room as Adric pulled lazily from her breast. John watched her for a long time without speaking. Martha tried to pretend there wasn't something hovering in the air over them What he remembered, and what he was now were juxtaposed into a person that she both knew and did not know.

"I'm sorry I scared you." he said finally. John moved to sit next to her on the bed with a liquidity that made Martha blush. There was no denying for her that she was attracted to him, in a completely different way than she was with the Doctor. With the Doctor, there was an attraction but it was edged with longing, like peering at a photos shown through smiling faces in an old album.

She nodded at his words, but said nothing. John went on. "This isn't what I always imagined marriage to be. I thought..." he looked around as if realizing for the first time he was in a room he shared with her. "I don;t want us to be this. My parents died when I was too young to remember what I could have learned from them about having a healthy relationship." he sighed. "Or, not."

Martha eyed him suspiciously but let him go on speaking. "Sarah Jane never married. We had an aunt, but she never married either. Blimey that is pretty sad."

Martha shifted Adric to the other side and placed her free hand on his arm comforting. "Listen, Martha, if you still want to go, I can't stop you, and I don;t want you to be here if you don't want to I thought this would be our home until later when we would buy a house, maybe have another..." he trailed off and nodded.

"I don't think it's fair to either of us that we stay here, like this." Martha whispered.

"I agree." John ran his hands over his face, the confusion from earlier was back, and it brought sadness with it. "Would you consider counseling?"

Martha had to bite the side of her mouth to repress the sudden giggle that errupted from somewhere inside of her. It was the Doctor's face, the Doctor's mouth, but it was something the Doctor never, in a million trillion years, had uttered. The stifled giggle sounded like a choked sob in the ears of the man next to her. He took his free arm and snaked it around her waist. "I think we should. I don't want to give up on this."

A thousand answers danced through her mind. Most of them were negative, some were snappish, there were a few accusatory and sarcastic. But, underneath the hurt and sour feelings that she had nursed for too long, was a small word, one that left the man next to her smiling into her shoulder.

XXXXXXXXXX

The alarm went off too early. She rolled over to her side and flopped an arm to try and stem the tide of wakefullness for another nine minutes. She turned again into her pillow, and stretched her other arm across the bed. The empty side.

They had decided last night that he would room in the nursery for now. She insisted it was all right, but John was much like the Doctor, relentless. He had even go so far as to pack his things up and take them into the other room "I want to make this right, Martha." he said with all the determination the Doctor would show when in a hurry to get to the next crisis.

She had stood watching his movements, and he refused any help on her part. "This is the only way, Martha. I would move out, but." he looked at Adric.

After her shower,Martha made her way int the kitchen. The table was laid out with near precision. "I was worried you would hit that snooze button and not have time for a good breakfast." john smiled . He served their breakfast and then sat himself across from her at the small table. "I want this to be a new start." he smiled. "And any good new start begins with breakfast."

"You don't have to make me breakfast," Martha protested as she demolished the fry up he had set before her.

"Which is exactly why I did it. The point is, Martha." he explained between bites. :Love does not need definition. It does not need reason, or logic, or...have to's" John reached over and stole a piece of bacon off of her plate. "It's a give and a take."

"You give me breakfast and steal the bacon?" she asked between forkfuls.

"Something like that." he nodded. "It's my goal to get us where we should have been a long time ago. I don;t remember everything I did, Martha, but your faith in me was far greater than mine in you, or at least in your perception. That has to change. So, if I have to be your personal attendant until you get how I feel is genuine. Then, so be it. "

"This is ridiculous." she announced as he removed her plate and started the dishes.

"Ridiculous is your feeling that you are second to someone who may have meant something to me at one time, but not enough to marry." John said.

After breakfast, he placed a brown bag in front of her. "Lunch," he smiled. "Don;t s[end your milk money and junk and play nice with the other doctors." he smiled. "But, not too nice."

He did not kiss her as she left, and Martha actually missed it.

XXXXXXXXXX

Every morning he made her breakfast, and they sat in the small kitchen talking, quietly. Martha found herself even setting her alarm clock a little earlier so she could sit in the kitchen with him while he fried bacon and eggs. They talked about nothing and everything. Martha found she loved the sound of his voice, the cadence of his words were nothing like that of his true self. John Bowman spoke slowly but effortlessly.

"I start teaching this week." he announced the next weekend while they sat at his piano. Martha nodded, she knew eventually he would be ready to be released back into society. They had led an exhaustive search for a reputable sitter, with the help of Jack who had no trouble doing a full background check on everyone they interviewed.

The week before, not long after their early morning breakfasts began, Martha was in the bedroom reading, a knock at the bedroom door produced John, hair neatly combed, new suit and all. He held in his hands a fragile looking cluster of flowers that she could only have guessed he picked out of their backyard. "Hullo." he smiled, and Martha smiled back as the lines of his face crinkled into the greeting.

"What's this then?" she asked, hoping she sounded as casual as she had hoped. Martha had even leaned onto the door frame, arms crossed.

He looked down at the flowers in his hand as if he had forgotten they were there. "These are for you."

"Peace offering?" she asked taking them in her hands and bringing them to her nose. The scent of fresh earth and sweet nectar filled her nostrils pleasantly.

He offered her a shy smile. "Actually," he tried, his now free hands seemed want for something to do. "Actually I just wanted to brighten your day."

It went that way, for two weeks now, Martha could not deny that his actions were starting to get to her, that her resolve was slowly caving.

All had come to this, as they sat in their living room. He at his favorite perch in front of the piano, and Martha on the floor watching Adric's new trick. He had learned to roll over, and she was saddened and happy at his small new miracle. "Yes, you do."

His fingers played a few notes of something Celtic and he spoke again. " I start back teaching this week, and I wondered if you would like to celebrate." He turned a hopeful expression to his wife.

"Celebrate?" she asked confused. "What do you mean?"''He played his fingers along the keys again and spoke. "What I mean is, you and me, celebrate, go out, like normal people who are happy."

"You mean a date?" she asked with a smile.

John nodded, "yes,, all right. I am asking you, my wife, for a date. Good Lord, most married folk just go. I don;t know why this has to be a discussion." he sighed and raised his head upward, not meeting her eyes. "Yes, Martha. I would like to go out, with you, on a date. Us. Together. No Adric."

The room fell silent, Martha wasn't sure how she should or evn wanted to react. SO much had changed for them in two weeks. He really was trying, and consequently, so was she. But, a date? "What kind of date?" she found herself asking.

"Oh the kind where we go out, have a good time, maybe even have dinner." he smiled. "A date, Martha. I am sure we have been on them before."

She shook her head, but smiled all the same. They had never really been on a date. Vacation, sort of. Running for their lives, definitely, but a date? " I guess we could, if we can find a sitter."

"We have a sitter, I phoned her, she is willing to do a night. I thought it would be good for us. We only have a year, you know." He spoke the last part wistfully.

Martha nodded but chose to ignore the statement. "Yes, well. A date." she squared her shoulders as if digging in for the inevitable. Jack had warned her last week, had told her to either get in, or get out. The thought of separating him from Adric, or herself, was an option that both frightened and disgusted her, and that had only left one viable option.

John nodded and continued to play softly pretending that it was as mullish of a topic s what they would eat for dinner. But, it wasn't. His family was everything to him, and he knew there was more to the story, while he could tell she loved him there was a lack of trust that he knew he was the only one to breach. He had called his sister two days before, begged Sarah Jane to tell him what was really going on. But, after twenty minutes of pleading, Sarah convincingly announced that she had had no idea what it was. Jack had been no help, and his list of possible confidants was wearing thin.

In truth, it was Martha he wanted to confide in; to be confided in. He wanted everything with her, but if after all of this, she still decided that enough was enough..."So, then after work tonight. Meet me here." he pushed a piece of paper across the top of the piano toward Martha.

She smiled at the location. "A date," she smiled. "Here?"

"Trust me?" he asked and smiled.

Martha nodded, grabbed her keys and smiled. "Six-thirty then." she confirmed and headed out the door.

XXXXXXXXXX

"That was both cute, interesting and oddly disturbing." she laughed as they left the school auditorium. "And, for some reason, it reminded me of Return of the Jedi."

John turned up one side of his face in a grin. How is Str Wars even remotely a part of this?" he asked, wishing he could take her hand into his as they walked through the still full parking lot. High school students and their parents grouped around the lot in packs as they congratulated their drama club.

Martha shrugged. "When George Lucas made the movie, he had wanted the planet Endor to be a planet of Wookies, but thought they would be too frightening, so he used a smaller more cute version of the creature. Ewoks."

HE stopped walking and turned to her in front of their car. "Martha Jones. I knew there was a reason I married you." he smiled. "But, yes I can see your point. I called all over Manchester to find anyone doing Love's Labour Lost, this was the only one I could find." he turned sad for a moment. "I'm sorry you didn't like it."

"Oh, I never said that." she smiled over to him as they got into the car. "I found it interesting. In fact, I thought the students gave a great performance."

"Look," he admitted as he started up the car and eased into traffic. "I know there are huge gaping holes in my memory. I never thought Encephalitis would be so damaging." John shook his head, but went on. "I just thought that, f we went to the same play we went to on our first date, it would create all new memories for us."

Martha reached across and placed her hand on his as he drove. "It has," she reassured him. "That was a nice play, and an even nicer gesture. I liked it, John. We are making memories now, new ones."

He nodded and fell silent, Martha wondered to herself, not for the first time, if so much of the Doctor was tied to his memories, how would it affect the man she rode next to. Would he hate the man he was for a year and a half after it all came undone? How could she go back, if she allowed herself to feel for this man, could she separate the two, or would she even have to? "We will get there." she said out loud, but still more to convince herself.

He nodded again and sighed. "Now, how about dinner?"

XXXXXXXXXX

By the time they made it back to their flat, the two were laughing, actually laughing. Their waiter had a funny accent, and he was terrible. Martha had thought that the meal out would be stinted and awkward. It wasn't. John seemed to have a wealth of funny stories about everything. He was one of those people who made up silly stories about strangers as they watched them. He kept her laughing the whole time.

John was an amazing human, and Martha could not help but find that easy facade slipping slowly as the night went on. She had to admit that John Bowman was someone she could have fallen for at one time.

But he wasn't a real person, and that alone was enough to keep reality from being sucked out by sheer fantasy.

He fumbled for the keys in the dark of their patio. The light had not worked since they moved in, something that both of them had at one time or another complained about. He dropped the keys onto the ground and reached to pick them up. When he came up again, the keys were not in his hands, and he reached for Martha.

His lips were on her before she knew what was happening, and she found that refusing to respond to his kisses was outside her realm of ability at that moment. His mouth was gentle and insistant, and Martha felt as if they were lulling her into some timid but responsive fugue. He pressed closer, arms around her possessive and determined. She wanted to push back, to force him away from her, instead, her traitorous arms wrapped around him in response, drawing her closer to him.

It wasn't a DNA exchange, nor the neatly chaste kisses in the past. This was writtten in stone, indelible in its nature. Just as she had given herself over to him, given herself over to the emotions that his touch had endeavored to bring about in her, he drew away from her, bent down to pick up the keys, opened the door, and lead her into their home by the hand.

In the end, after sending the sitter off for the night, they ended up in their separate rooms, but somehow Martha knew that whatever had happened on the patio was only the beginning.


	10. Even Daylight Will Remind You

**Sorry this took so long, and i am still not happy with the chapter. I have had writer's block, i know wherew this is going, but..**

**Hope you enjoy it**

He pulled her through the living room to the piano. Martha had begun to understand that as a human, this was his safe place. She smiled from her place beside him. How often had they sat here, like this in the month since she had been exiled. He smiled at her between strokes of the keys, and she tucked her hands between her denim clad legs. Since their first 'date' two weeks ago, much of the tension that had been there was evaporating.

"So, Christmas at the Jones residence, then?" he sighed

She could tell he was not looking forward to it. Somehow he seemed to recall how much her mother disliked him. He even remembered the infampus slap. :She doesn;t hate you, you know." Martha tried with a small grin.

"No, she smacks everyone she meets." he offered.

"Sure she does." Martha returned with a knowing smile. "Makes weddings very interesting."

"Martha..." he stopped playing and folded his arms in front of him. "She hasn;t been our greatest champion in all of this, and given the state of our marriage right now, I am afraid she will talk you into a separation."

It was astounding to her, to see him being so open and honest with how he felt, his fears and doubts. The vulnerability wasn't what got to her, the honesty clinched it. She put her hand on his arm and gave it a small squeeze.

"She did give consent for us to get married." the fact left a sour taste in her mouth, but Martha could not mention all the details to him. Not that it would do any good, even the Doctor in his right mind was sincerely unapologetic for it. The man beside her right now knew nothing of what she had been through, save for some fabrication that barely skated along the edges of reality.

He nodded silently and gave her a small kiss on the cheek. They had been coming more frequently, his small gestures of affection. She had even kissed him a few times. They were nothing like what had transpired on the front porch that night, the memory of that made her burn with shame and longing, creating an intoxicating cocktail of passion that Martha was sure to get her into trouble by the New Year.

She had called her mother to let her know she was all right, a five minute check in had turned into a two hour conversation. Martha warned her mother about the Doctor's condition after her mother's insistence upon Christmas in London.

"What do you mean, he's humn" Francine had asked.

Martha had shrugged, drew a long breath, and launched into a stinted retelling of the last six weeks. Her mother was silent throughout the conversation. Not even an 'mmhmmm' nor a 'what?" It made the young doctor nervous. "It's complicated, Mum." Martha answered, feeling a headache coming on.

In the end, her mother promised to fill everyone in, as long as Martha promised to bring Adric along. "will Tish be all right with that?" Martha asked.

"Tish is doing great, Martha, since..." Francine trailed off, and Martha thought she heard a faint sniff at the end. "I think she needs to see him, I think she wants to see him. It'll be good for her."

"Well, be that as it may, Mum, I was referring to seeing me, not Addy."

"What a dreadful nick name. Yes, Martha. I think the two of you need to kiss and make up."

It was grade school all over again. But, instead of arguing over a ten quid sweater from Debenham's, Martha had tossed angry words at her only sister, and she knew she was the one that needed forgiveness. No one had forced her into the situation, though she was asked, over and over again. The thought rekindled the anger inside of Martha all over again. Her life had not been of her own choosing, she had not had the opportunity to choose. She often wondered if, given the circumstances, she could go back in time, would she do it all over again.

The thought made her giggle as she realized her current permanent address was 1 TARDIS Way.

"You look like the cat that swallowed the canary." John accused next to her. "Good to see you can get a giggle out of my misery.'

"Nothing to be miserable about, I have it on good authority that everyone will be on their best behaviour." she soothed. "They just want to see Adric and tell us how we are screwing up as parents."

John shrugged, "Their right I suppose. " John threw his head back and placed his hands on his eyes.

"You have been awful tired lately." Martha noted, her hand coming to rest on his forehead. "You feeling all right?"

"Save it for the NHS." But John's humor did nothing to reassure Martha. "I've been having the most vivid dreams lately."

"Really," Martha congratulated herself on the shock in her own voice. She had been expecting the dreams to start, it was a matter of time. "Anything good?" she offered him a raised eyebrow, reassuring him that she was not trying to treat him. Martha knew that the man she shared her life with right now, hated when she did that. Not too much different from the Doctor. She also knew how good it felt for both of them to have the physical contact, even the slight touch of her hand to his head under the guise of health seemed to lighten his mood. She noted it to ask about in a year or so. The touches, she recalled, were esential to whatever thing he had done to her. She felt better when he touched her, even now. She felt her anger disipate minutely with the connection, and John placed his hand on hers and took hold of it.

"You make me feel better." he smiled. "Just by being near me, you make me feel so much better."

Martha nodded.

"Your patients are so lucky." John placed his free arm around her waist and moved her closer to him on the bench. Before she realized it, they were kissing, deep and passionately as if there were no histories of tension between them. Martha gave over to the sensation, allowed her body to once again sink into the abyss of his touch. There was no bottom there, nor did she care to ever find one.

He deepened the contact, an urgency in his movement against her mouth. Urgencies noted and returned, she brought her hands to his hair and held him fast to her. He was like a drug, and there and then, she could not get enough.

It was the tiny wail of the third person in the house that finally broke them apart. Sh rose to get him, but John was faster. Casting a small wolfish grin in her direction, he lifted Adric into his arms and kissed his forehead.

Martha realized she was well and truly screwed.

"So," she tied, just starting to feel her heart return to its normal cadence. "I take it, tht is a yes on two days of fun in London?"

He cuddled the baby closer to him. "On one condition."

"I didn;t know we were negotiating."

"Martha, you are asking me to walk into a dangerous situation..."

"It's just Mun." she countered, matching his smile. "You make it sound as if we are staring down Daleks."

His face made her wish she had not said anything. "Daleks?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. "Have I been talking in my sleep?"

"Occasionally." she covered, thankful for his unintentional out clause. "But all right, let's hear your list of demands, Dr, Evil."

HE tipped his head slightly at the monniker, then laghed and nodded. "All right, one thing."

"Only one?"

"Yes, Martha, only one condition."

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Their second date was another homage to their past, at least as John remembered it. They took Addy with them and road the train to central Manchester. "Why the train?" she asked as they sat side by side.

He shrugged. "I dunno, this is our second date, and I seem to recall the last time around we got stuck in a horrendous traffic jam. Thought this would be safer." he was quiet for a econd then spoke again. "I recall the traffic jam, and the weird pharmacy..."

She nodded. "You asked me to come to New York, whisked me away practically. We were trying to get to the concert you were giving. We got stuck in traffic..."

"...and got separated, right?"

"Yeah, I got...held up." she nodded.

He seemed put b her answer. "You were robbed? Why don't I remember that?"

Her hand found his arm, "no, no not like that. There was an accident, and you know me-"

"Always the do-gooder." he smiled. John held Adric in the snuggly, she had tried to take him, but he had, if at all possible, grown more attached to the baby. Martha wondered if all of the skirting of the truth would hurt later, but the necessity of keeping the two of them safe was greater to her than any hurt feelings later. She leaned down and softly kissed the sleeping baby on the head. The train had lulled him, and as far as the rest of the world knew, Adric Bowman was an angelic baby.

"So, where are we going then?" Martha asked. "New York?"

"No," he smiled. "That was quite enough the last time."

"So, where then?"

He did not answer, it was one of his many ticks that Martha notied. The Doctor would have given an entire spiel about going somewhere without answering the questions. In fact, the Doctor would have gone on for twenty minutes about destinations, and he would have veered his tirade into territory that had absolutely nothing to do with their present locaation.

But, that was the Doctor, a time traveling alien being.

John Bowman was not the Doctor, but he still knew how to avoid a question he was not ready to answer; with silence.

It was not that he was ignoring...exactly. Martha figured it was a deliberate sidestep around an issue. Sometimes he did it at the piano. She would ask him what he wanted to do about dinner, or had he seen the checkbook, or something as innocuous like were they out of tissue. He would ignore the answer, as if it were just beyond his realm of understanding. It was the type of thing that had started off cute, which lead to being interesting. Right now, she was still at the shrug shoulders stage of the mannerism, but she knew, at some point long before John opened the watch, Martha would be ready to scream.

John lead her through the streets of central anchester, through to a trendy area frequented by hipsters and college students. He stopped in front of a shabby looking diner with pictures of the Statue of Liberty and the New York skyline.

"Finklstein's?" she asked with a smirk.

"New York style Delicatessen." he nodded. "My students highly recommended it."

"You asked your students for a good place to eat?" she asked. "At what point is that part of Music Theory?"

"All that music makes you hungry. Besides, I thought going to New York again wouldn;t be such a good idea. " he looked down at Adric. "And its a bit harder to be so spontaneous now."

They settled into the ancient booth at the back of the diner. Martha was surprised at her stomach's appreciation for the delicious smells coming from behind the greasy doors. The place did remind her of New York, she had been there a few times while with UNIT, and it was sort of dystopic to be sitting with the Doctor in a completely normal, non life threatening situation.

"The kids tell me the corned beef here is amazing."

They sat together huddled n the booth, passing Adric between them. Martha worried about the cleanliness of the place, and John reassured her that a few germs wouldn't hurt. While they argued over who would change the diaper, an elderly couple made there way into the small diner.

They chose a booth directly across from the younger couple. Martha noted their cadence was both deliberate and oddly young for their advanced age. The woman was tall, stately even. Martha imagined at one point she must have been a force to be reckoned with, and probably still was. She moved with a grace that reminded Martha of a ballerina.

Her husband was the same height as his wife, his gray hair was still lush and full. He seemed to be completely rapt by the woman at his side. He held her hand as they sat across the table, and Martha could see they were having an intense conversation, punctuated by not so covert looks in their direction.

"Look at that," John noted. "They seem so much in love, even now. I bet they have been together forever," he added wistfully.

"They are beautiful." she noted, still wondering why they kept looking at them. On some level, had she never traveled with the Doctor, or walked the Earth, she would not be so suspicious of an elderly couple seeing themselves in a young family. But, the Martha that was now in the New York Deli, could not help but feel her spidey senses go into overdrive.

"That'll be us someday," John murmured low, reached across the table and took her hand in his.

She wanted to tell him the truth, but it served nothing to negate his happiness at that moment, and the sensation of the skin to skin contact lulled her into that odd sense of absolute contentment, that she did not notice the elderly woman had come to stand next to their table.

"Excuse me." she offered in a stilted American accent softened by Celtic vowels. "But I could not help but notice your baby. How old is he?"

Martha found herself placing an arm around Adric's seat, but John offered a proud smile and spoke. "He's three and a half months. Growing like a weed."

The older woman nodded and cast a glance back toward her husband who rose to stand nest to them. "He's beautiful." she smiled. "Its good to see you."

John and Martha exchanged a look, and Martha wondered how this woman knew the Doctor. "Do I know you?" he asked/

"John," Martha interrupted quickly. "I am sure they are fans. You know my husband's work, music, right?" She reinforced her words with a look that must have spoke volumes, for the two elderly people nodded solemnly.

"We are visiting here from the states, our son moved here. Wanted to be close to his roots, whatever that means." the woman smirked.

"And you came to eat at a New York Deli?" Martha asked with a frown.

"We live in New York." the husband finally spoke. He placed his hand on his wife's elbow, and with a small nod lead her back to their booth. The woman seemed unready to go, but nodded angrily before going to sit down again. They resumed their arguments and stares until the woman excused herself for the restroom in back.

"Excuse me." Martha rose from the table.

"You always travel in packs " John smiled as he fed Adric a chip from his plate. The baby seemed more interested in smashing it in his hands than actually attempting to eat it.

The washroom was small, but clean, nothing like the bathrooms she remembered when she visited New York. The woman stood by the sink and looked as if she had been crying. "What's wrng with him?" she asked without turning around.

"It's complicated." Martha answered.

"I know from complicated, and believe me, I can figure it out. Speak."

Martha drew her shoulders together and sighed. "If you know who that is, then you know that there are things that can not be explained given certain circumstances. I probably shouldn't even be talking to you right now."

The woman turned then, quicker than a woman of her advanced age should. It caught Martha off guard and she took a step back. "Now you listen, I know that face, maybe I never met that face, but I know what's n it. IF I recall that's him before I met him. I'm not asking you to give me all the details, I just want to know, is he going to be all right?"

"Right as rain in a few months." Martha nodded. "Call it witness protection."

The old woman nodded. "Just see that you keep him in one piece, yeah?" She dried her hands and readjusted her purse onto her shoulders. "Tell him," The older woman paused then, as if thinking of the right thing to say. "When he is back to himself again, tell him to try reading the whole book."

By the time Martha made it out of the lavatory, the elderly couple were gone, John smiled when he saw her, he always did. "I was wondering if you got lost in there."

Martha sat down and began to clean off Adric, who had managed to smear potato all over himself in her absence. John seemed to want to say something, his fingers were twitching as if he missed his piano. It was one of his human habits that Martha had picked up on early. "What's wrong?" ahe asked.

He shrugged, then pretended to look out the window. "It's just, meeting them, that odd couple. They knew me, and I didn't remember them."

"I am sure you fans of some sort." she grinned.

"That's just it, I really don't They seemed to know me, and I could not recall ever having met them." he sighed and rubbed his hands over his eyes. "Can you do something for me?" he asked in a voice that reminded Martha of a little boy searching for his mother.

"Anything,"

"Tell me something, about me, about myself, before...before all of this. Before I got sick and got the Etch a Sketch treatment."

"You are the same, really." Martha tried.

"No, I'm not." he shook his head. "I'm not the same and I know it."

Martha picked at the reminder of her Corned Beef on Rye before speaking. "You were much more animated. Talked a lot more. One of the things that used to drive me nuts was how much you talked. " she realized in that moment that she actually missed it, missed him. "Twitchy was what my Mum sometimes called you."

"Oh, I could not have been that bad." he said, and Martha could here the relefif in his voice. He had begun to doubt his life, doubt his memories. She understood giving him something back of who he really is was not such a bad thing at all.

"You whisked me off in the middle of the night, and that was what pissed my mother off so much. Her strong level headed daughter had allowed herself to be taken off from her studies by, of all things, a man much older than her."

"I'm not that much older." he grinned nervously.

She understood, the age thing again. Here, they were fifteen years apart in age, not some immeasurable amount that was the reality of the whole mess. For n older man to have a younger wife, it sets them into a frame of mind, does she dream of men her own age? Will she leave for someone younger, less gray? "I know that, but my Mum. It's different, I understand better now, since Adric." She leaned into him and met his eyes. "It's never been about age for me, all right?"

John nodded, "does this mean you are going to go about smacking people for no good reason?"

"Oh, there will always be a good reason." she lifted Adric into her arms and began to put his jackets on him. "Him. There is nothing I would not do for him."

"Christmas in London it is, then."

The college student at the front brought her left hand up as John attempted to pay the bill. "It's all been paid for, Sir." the blonde with too many piercings insisted. "Even the tip."


	11. Even Dreams Will End The Same

She awoke to the smell of rain and coffee, alone in her bed in the flat she shared with a man she barely knew. Martha could hear morning sounds and a faint humming that meant he was in a good mood.

It was Christmas Eve morning, and she knew it was time to get up. They had planned the long drive to London, forgoing the too long visit that Francine had initially proposed. Two days was enough of pretending happy family, thank you very much.

Martha emerged from the solitude of her room, wearing her old robe and nothing on her feet. The heater had not yet reached the floor and Martha relished the cold tickling her toes as she made her way to the kitchen. "Whatever that is, it smells really amazing."

He turned and looked at her over his shoulder, the smile on his face was as dazzling as the Doctor when he would get wind of an impending adventure. "Merry Christmas Eve." he came to her and wapped his arms around her. "How'd you sleep?"

Martha hugged back, "Pretty good, no midnight calls for milk." she smiled.

"He is sleeping through the night; I thought we would never get there." John shook his head in awe. "He is growing so fast, it seems like only yesterday we were...Hang on, I wasn't there for his birth, but I came in later, didn't I?"

Martha nodded, glad he could not see her face. She continued to hold onto him, hating when the lies had to mask the truth. In her bottom drawer were two watches, so precious that she had to hide them. There were times while she was at work that she feared they would be stolen while they were all out of the house. Martha did not dare to put them in a safe deposit box, she needed to have them near. "Yeah, you were away, remember, and we weren't exactly getting on too well at the time."

"Why?" he pulled away and did look at her face then, his eyes begged for the right answers. Martha held her head, refusing to lower her gaze, but the twist in her gut was even worse as she forced a lie sandwiched between half-truths. "You wanted to be there, but I .." she did lower her gaze then, funny how she found herself more ashamed of the truth. "I didn't call you. I didn't want you to come." She admitted finally.

He nodded and sighed. "You know, for someone that hates me-"

"I don't hate you John." Martha answered.

"But not calling me for our son's birth? Why would you do that?" he asked without anger. In fact, the sound of his voice was a hurt that Martha had to admit called to her own guilt at her actions. "When I left you, I was about seven months pregnant." She moved to sit at the table as John served up plates and sat one in front of her. He nodded as he seated himself, encouraging her to go on. "I was hurt, in a lot of pain."

"Physical pain?" John asked with sudden concern.

Martha shook her head and went on. "Emotional. I was angry at how my life had turned out, angry at how I felt that I was rushed into a marriage that I didn't have any control over. Not you, the marriage." she shrugged then, realizing how much of the truth was spilling out, wrapped in pretty ties of a fake life. "IS this a conversation we should be having on Christmas Eve?" she asked, suddenly weary.

"his is a conversation we should have had a long time ago." John answered. "You know, I walk around here like a man in a dream. I have enough chunks of my own life missing that I feel like I don;t even know myself, who I am."

"John-" Martha said.

But the tall man across from her shook his head, "No, its true. I don't recall childhood friends, or a lot of my childhood. Hell, I don't even remember what my parents looked like. But I remember you, Martha. Standing in the halls of the hospital; running though New York. I remember you. Your laughter at my jokes, the look in your eyes when we first met. I remember trying over and over again to impress you, I remember every sad expression on your face, and I remember the joy in your eyes when I kissed you the first time. It's always your face, Martha. Adric too, but yours, so wrapped up in everything in my life in the last few years. You are inextricable from me. You know what that tells me?"

Martha shook her head as she stabbed at her omelet.

His hand reached across the table, "It tells me that you are my family. That, no matter what I may have done in the past, it wasn't about hurting you. It was never about hurting you. Whatever I did, and I imagine it was pretty bad. Whatever I did I did out of my own fucked up since of reality." He went back to eating, as if nothing had been said. He attacked his breakfast as if it was trying to leave his plate.

She held her fork in front of her mouth, surprised at his words. It was Martha who spoke. "You didn't just hurt me; I guess we hurt each other. I didn't call you because I thought it would make everything easier. I had no idea until after he was born how bad of a decision it had been. "

John shrugged from across the table. "Wither way, we're here now, shouldn't we both be in it to win it?" he grinned.

"For Adric," she nodded, finally beginning to see that it really was long term, that whatever this was between her and the Doctor, it had a purpose.

John shook his head determined. "No, that's no reason to stay together."

Martha raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"I don't mean he is no reason, he is every reason." John sighed and placed his fork down. "I mean Martha, we should stay together for us. I can see it, I remember it. We were good together. Are good together." He took her hand again. "Besides, who else do we got?"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"Well, this is awesome." John announced as they arrived in front of Francine's respectably large four bedroom house. But, John was referring to the large black SUV parked in front. "Why is Jack here?" he asked with the same tone of disbelief. It had been a long dive to London, and Adric was none too pleased with being on lockdown for five and a half hours.

"I think he is dating my sister." Martha announced off handedly. In fact, she was not sure what the two of them were up to. "I think."

"No one really dates my cousin." John replied with a crooked smile. "They sorta get dragged along for the ride."

Martha playfully slugged his shoulder before getting out of the car to retrieve the now screaming infant that was Adric. "Not an image I want in my head, thanks." By the time they made it to the front door, Adric was up to full blast, they had even tried passing him between them to see if he would cam down. Nothing worked.

"Give him here," Francine demanded as she opened the door. "I can only guess what the two of you have done to him to make him scream like that."

"Nice to see you to, Mum." Martha smiled, ignoring the 'I told you so,' look from John. "I assure you, he has made it this far without ay trips to hospital or hostile kidnappings.

"Well, I am sure it was not from a lack of trying on both your parts."

"Mum," Martha warned with a glare. They followed her mother into the warm house and Martha was instantly homesick. It's a funny thing to return home merely for a visit to the house you grew up in. It feels like your home, and not, all at the same time. She took their bags and climbed the stairs to her old bedroom.

"Have I been here before?" John asked, close at her heels, and Martha was glad he went first so he could not see the smile that had spread across her face. He was still afraid of her mother, as it should be.

"Once or twice," Martha replied as she lead him to her room. "It's not exactly your favorite place in the universe."

"Well, that went without saying." She heard him mumble. "Oh, I remember this!" John pointed at a picture on her dresser, and Martha swore that had not been there before. It was a picture taken at the Italian restaurant, before the debriefing her family had endured after the year that never was. Martha had never seen it before, and she realized her mother had supplied it for John to see. "We all went out to dinner, after..." he seemed confused for a moment, John's head tilted back and his eyes went far away. "It was after..."

Martha had been so good on her feet, but that day was one of her blind sides. The Doctor hadn;t stayed, had only come to accompany her family to the location then left with UNIT officers. He had gone to retrieve his ship, had not even stayed for the dinner with her family. "You left, you only popped in for a moment." She began to wonder if coming home for Christmas had been such a good idea after all.

John snapped his fingers. "I had a sick friend! I had to go suddenly, but there was something that happened before that, something important."

Martha shrugged. "Don't strain, it'll come to you." she placed her and John's things away as he roamed her childhood memories.

"Metallica? Really? That's not even real music."

Martha grabbed the CD out of his hands. "If you are gonna offer a running commentary or everything in my room, I am gonna have to charge you admission."

John grinned and folded his arms. "Martha?"

"Hmm?" she offered trying to ignore him, and wondering how so much of the Doctor could be bleeding through.

"We're sharing a room." he smiled.

"Yes, we are." She agreed with a nod, "and so is Addy."

He seemed completely nonplussed at her reminder. "We are sharing a room."

"With Addy," she offered more for herself than for him.

"And, a bed." he grinned and placed his hands around her middle and drew her to him, "I miss sleeping next to you. I mean, don't get me wrong, it has been a good idea, getting to know who we are before going any further, but..." he nuzzled her neck.

Things had been getting better between them in the last two months. He seemed more than attentive, always woke up with Adric in the middle of the night, dates and long talks were slowly breaking down Martha's carefully constructed resolve against having anything to do with either John o the Doctor. She wasn't as immune to him as she had convinced herself she was, and wondered if there were inoculations against it somewhere in the TARDIS.

She really missed that old ship, but Sarah Jane and Jack had agreed with her that the safest place for the ship would be in Sarah Jane's attic. Martha had planned to take a trip out to visit her. She was sure the ship missed her Doctor. And, somehow,, with the frequent in and out she had had recently, it had somehow become her home as well.

"John," she warned half-heartedly.

He let go of her with a sigh and sank onto the bed. "It's been ages for me. For us." He nodded.

She sat next to him and placed her hand on his thigh. "We come a long way, yeah?" she asked with a smile.

"I could think of how this could go a lot further." He returned. John held up his hands at her glare. "Right, I know,"

Martha opened her mouth to speak, to quell the lingering fire in his words, but the man next to her was determined to pour gasoline onto an already smoldering heap. "It's just..." he sighed hands moving through his hair. "I don't remember us being together."

"I don;t understand, this morning you said I was all you could really recall-"

"No, I meant that. But I don't recall us being...together." John's voice had become deep and husky, his lips moved around a timbre of heat and expectation.

"John..." Martha repeated. She rose from the bed, but John was faster, he grabbed her wrist and tugged. She remained standing, and John came to stand close to her.

"I don't remember us in that way. I don't remember what it's like to feel you around me, to hear the soft little moans I just know you make. To feel you open in front of me like a good book." he whispered into her ear.

She was stuck, trapped by her own vulnerability to his tactile maneuvers. "It'll come to you," she repeated.

"It may," he nodded. "But, will you?" His eyes burned with a desire she was not ready to acknowledge. Not here, not now. "Do you love me, Martha? Or are we just here because it's the only choice?"

She tried to shake her head, but her eyes lowered, it was a lie too big to tell, a truth too horrible to reckon. "I'm trying, John."

He brought his lips to hers for a quick but heated kiss. "Tell me, have you ever loved me?" John asked.

Martha nodded her head slowly, assured of the truth in her words. "There was a time, John." She swallowed, wanting to use his name, the real one she knew. "There was a time when you were the reason I smiled in the morning. Your eyes were so manic, so much fire and ice and rage in them. I wanted to be that reason you burned, I wanted to be that fire in your eyes."

"And now?" he asked. "Now that I am not the same man you kissed in the hospital. Now?"

"You taught me to run. And I have not stopped since."

XXXXXXXXXXXX

"Why is my son dressed like the Anti-Christ?" John asked as they made their way downstairs. Adric sat quietly in Francine's lap.

"It's his little Santa suit, how do you figure that is evil?" Francine asked while waving Addy's hand at his parents.

"Santa, Satan. Not much difference in a name. Maybe it's a cover." John shrugged taking Addy into his arms.

"I think it's cute." Martha smiled. "Is that _the_ suit, Mum?"

"Of course, it's been worn by all three of you, and now my two grandchildren have worn it. I need to get my camera." Francine ran for the other room, leaving the small family seated in front of the tree.

"I should go and see where everyone has gotten to. I know Jack is around here somewhere."

"Well, just make sure that you knock first." John threw back as she made her way to the back of the house.

She found her mother in the guest bedroom rifling through old boxes in search of something. "Mum, what are you doing?"

"Giving you two sometime. You were upstairs for a whiel, I figured you needed to be alone as a family for a bit." she turned and smiled at her daughter. "I remember when I spent out first Christmas together at your father's family's house. Ugh, that was a nightmare."

"It's not like that, Mum/' Martha quickly amended.

Francine looked at her daughter as if she had just announced she was joining the circus. "I don;t understand." Francine Jones admitted. "He asked for my permission-"

"Yeah, thanks for that, Mum. You could have asked how I felt about it." Martha fired back.

"...he explained everything to me. Told me it was necessary because of Adric,"

Martha shook her head; no doubt it was exactly what he told her. She sighed and rubbed her eyes with her hand. "Its fine, Mum." Martha insisted, with a sudden need to change the subject. There was no blame to be laid on her mother\s part, Francine only ever acted out of love for her family, and her fierceness in that endeavor was more endearing than dangerous. Well, at least for her family, "where is everyone?"

Francine finally did smile then, letting go of the confused look she had acclimated since \Martha found her in the spare room. "They are all downstairs, in the family room." Francine answered with a knowing nod.

"Oh no," Martha shook her head as nostalgia roiled over her. "Who won the coin toss?"

"Your sister,"

Martha shook her head but smiled. "'The Nightmare before Christmas,' then?"

Francine patted her daughter\s shoulder and moved to the door. "It\s a tradition, now that you have your own family, you will start to understand."

Martha\s expression must have been as confusing as she thought without looking in a mirror. Francine spoke carefully, probably, as Martha thought, recalling what her daughter had been like soon after Adric's birth. "You are all right, aren't you Martha? "

Martha figured her mother needed the affirmation that it was all sunshine and roses; that her life with the Doctor was just about everything that made Martha happy. "It's good, Mum." She nodded reassuringly. "Everything is good, we are….getting closer. At least we were before this happened."

Francine smiled. "He is rubbish as a human, isn't he?"

You have no idea, Martha thought before offering her mother a knowing smile accentuated with a squeeze of the older woman's hand.

"Well, go on down and watch the movie with everyone, I am sure your favorite will get it's turn in the rotation." Martha hid in the room for another five minutes, trying to sort both her feelings and her ability to react to the situations she had been placed in. He trusted her to care for him, it had been that way since she first came to travel with him. It was always her responsibility to make sure he didn't get himself into trouble, or make sure he was healthy. Why was that her duty?

Then again, she had just eased her mother's mind with a soft lie about her own life.

Martha sat of the firm bed in the room and ran her hands over her face. It was becoming more than clear that this situation would not end pretty. Much as it had in Farmingham. Only then, Martha had made a complete fool of herself at the end; had practically thrown herself at him, and for what? For more coldness and indifference, more ambiguity in his reaction to her feelings?

Martha had never had trouble with rejection, she had always felt that nothing ventured and nothing gained was but far the best way to get through life. She had been a fool to tell the Doctor how she had felt then, but it was two years ago now, and while she was sure he recalled her words; his stoic indifference was forever etched in her mind.

And, while Martha Jones had no fear of rejection, fear of failure was a physical and tangible thing in her life. It was that fear that placed her at the top of classes all her life, and it was that fear that lead her to graduate with honors and the highest marks in her cvlass. No, fear of failure was a motivator to success, Martha Jones had counted herself lucky to have figured that out early in life.

Yet, was it that fear that had kept her now in emotional limbo? Was she basking in her sense of rightness and the ability to fob off failure buy not trying? The Doctor had told her in the console room that day, that he would only be able to see her as his wife; there was no equivocation from that. It was as indelible as one could get. He could forget who he was, but not who she was to him.

Anyone else would have been flattered, would have tripped over their own ego rushing to accommodate the now human man. Admittedly, she thought to herself, that list used to have her name written all over it.

Maybe that was at the heart of her holding him at arm's length. What she could once have blamed Rose's presence on was no longer a catalyst for all the behaviors she felt unjustly put upon her. There was a time, Martha knew, when she was the problem, but Rose had faded into the past when the Doctor voluntarily sent her back to the other universe. For good.

Martha rose from the bed and made her way back to the sitting room where she had left John and Adric. An animated conversation floated down the hall as she came to the sitting room. Tish was laughing at something John had said, and John's voice seemed to hold a lightness she had never heard.

Martha!" Tish spoke. "He's so big, and so beautiful." Tish became quiet at that, a dark cloud passed over her features as Martha sat next to her sister. "The pictures do not do him justice. He is so…I didn't expect him to be so…."

"Normal?" Martha added, ignoring the look of confusion from John.

Tish nodded, "Yeah, yeah."

John looked between the two sisters, confused as to the exchange. "Is there something wrong, Tish?| he asked.

Martha moved to sit beside her sister as Tish held Adric."She\s fine, John."

John nodded and stood. "All right, I can see this is about to turn into some commercial for female products." John stretched and turned toward the back of the house. Near the kitchen door, he turned and smiled. "It's amazing how much he looks like you Tish," John noted. "He doesn't look anything like my sister, but you. He's the spitting image." He turned and headed down the stairs without a second thought.

"He really doesn't have the slightest clues as to who he is, does he?" Tish asked after the ten minutes of awkward silence following John's announcement.

"He has no clue." Martha smiled. "Though, he didn't have much of one before he turned himself human, so…" Martha finally shrugged in lieu of an explanation. "Listen, Tish I want to apologize—"

Tish held up her hand and shook her head. "No, Martha. Let's just forget all that, I mean, hasn't been the greatest few years for the Joneses, has it?"

Martha's response was a wordless shake of her head, but an emphatic one nonetheless.

"Right," Tish surmised, then fell into silence again. She hefted the three month old baby into her hands and held him in front of her. "Up until you two had to go into intergalactic witness protection, the Doctor sent me pictures, almost every other day."

"Really? Oh Tish I am sorry he should not have—"

"You apologize way too much, Martha. " Tish spoke, still looking at Adric. "He does look like me, that is uncanny." She cuddled the infant closer. "I liked getting the pictures, it was good closure, and I was able to see that he was safe, and loved and cared for. I was really glad when the pictures included you."

"Genetics can be funny." Martha said. "You are ok, though?" she quickly glanced between her sister and the child she now considered hers.

"I will never take him from you, Martha." Tish asserted as if she had read the younger woman's mind. "He's not, for me, do you understand?" She smiled at her younger sister then, a smile to reassure her that her child would remain hers. "Big change from the tough need no one attitude you had before."

"Someone has to look out for him." Martha admitted.

"You are starting to sound like Mum." Tish smiled.

Martha smiled back and sighed. "Tish, when this happened, when you asked the Doctor to save him, to save Adric, did you know why you were doing it? Or, do you think it was because of the…what was done to you?"

Tish smiled and allowed her head to rest against the back of the plush sofa. "That is sort of a funny question, Martha. Is there a reason you want to know about how my mind worked when I was out of control?"

"Yes," Martha admitted. "I want to know how much control you had."

Tish nodded, "I suppose you would want to know, should know."


	12. When There's Too Much To Remember

**Got my Mojo back on this one, faster updates, sorry about the long waits in between, i finally know where this thing is going. thanks for all the love and lurking, hope you enjoy it**

"Why do you need to know so badly?" Tish asked with a sidelong glance.

Martha shrugged and eased herself into the couch. "You just said I should know, and, I want to know, Tish. I need to know what happened that made you want to keep him alive."

"What you mean is," Tish corrected in a voice so similar to their mother's that Martha 's eyes moved around the room to see if she ahd entered. "You want to know about the whammy, and what it did to me, and how it affected me." She finished with a sigh.

"Yeah, I guess I do, Tish."

Tish rose from the couch and headed toward the back. "I am going to take him to Mum, if you want the whole story, then it's going to be a minute, and I doubt you want to be interrupted by people looking for him."

By the time Tish came back ten minutes later, she had a tray of tea and snacks and a promise of absolute peace for the next two hours. "How do you know that?" Martha asked.

"They just started watching 'A Christmas Story.'" Tish smiled. "Jack is keeping 'John from coming upstairs with alcohol and Mum is in grandmother heaven."

"You make this all sound so ominous." Martha shook her head and took a sip from her tea.

"Isn't it, though?" Tish asked with an offish tone. "It's the part of the story that I could not tell you. The part I promised not to tell."

"Promised who? " Martha asked.

Tish didn't answer the question when she spoke. "Let me tell the story, Martha. It's fair to let you know some things, and I think it might help you."

Martha nodded, noticing for the first time how strong her sister was now, the weepy and emotional woman of two years ago was gone; but so was the flirty irreverent sister she had always had. In their place was a third Letitia, a woman made of iron, steel and diamond.

"You know I was on the TARDIS for a while."

Martha nodded, she knew.

"Did he ever tell you for how long?" Martha could only shake her head, in fact there was very little of it that the Doctor would come clean about, but it was her own fault, had she asked he would have told her. Maybe, she still had that belief about knowing and never being able to go back. "I was on the TARDIS for a month, even went to a few weird planets. " Tish smiled at Martha's shocked expression.

"I never knew. He never said anything about it."

"You never asked, Martha. And anyway, it wasn't anything huge, I just needed to be there for a time, then I had a hard time leaving. It's the safest place in the universe, you know?"

Martha nodded; she understood that part as well.

"Let's back up." Tish decided. "I think you need to hear about it. He asked me not to say anything, Martha. But, given the circumstances now, I don't think it will hurt. In fact, it might help." Tish turned to look at her sister, stare really. Martha held her cup in front of her face as a shield, suddenly fearful of Tish's intensity. "Do you love him?" Tish asked finally.

Martha sat stoically, not even a blink to mar her features.

Tish sighed and sat back into the sofa. "All right, Martha, now this has to be done."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX

She wandered through the halls feeling the gentle nudge n her mind. Martha had once told her that the ship was alive, and there was no doubt in her mind of the reality of it. She had only been here for two hours, and the ship had made for her a room fit for a queen. The room itself was the size of her entire flat back in Notting Hill, and the bathroom made her friends Jacuzzi look like a toddler wading pool.

After taking a long hot shower and fighting with Jack and the Doctor, Tish angled through the corridors in search of something resembling a kitchen. She was more hungry than tired, even though Jack had tried to steer her toward a nap,he had the best intentions and the worst manners she had ever met in a man.

The ship finally did lead her to a kitchen that looked more like a mad scientist's lab than an actual functioning galley. But, the refrigerator in the far corner was a dead giveaway. She made her way past the three tables piled with gadgetry and the ancient looking stove and wondered when the last time the room had been through either a good thorough cleaning, or a serious bomb attack. Either one was as least likely.

She found milk and cereal and thanked God the alien typically traveled with human companions. Tish made herself a bowl of Cocoa Puffs and slid into the bench that passed as a kitchen chair.

"Oh! Those are mine!" She heard from behind her. The Doctor stood eying her choice of snack with all the pout of a two year just informed that the toys would, in fact, have to be shared.

"There is still plenty in there." She assured him.

"There's other types of cereal in there too," he grumbled. "Ah, here we are. Big bowl!" He sat down across from her and dove into his bowl like it would jump off the table at any moment.

Tish smiled at his mania, it was the kind of behavior that would have drove her nuts in anyone else. But, this was the Doctor; she had seen him caged and abused over an entire year, what they shared was more like siblings having survived an alcoholic parent. Love and dysfunction roiled into one. The Doctor had become the big brother she never wanted, but was glad to have. "Are you always this serious about cereal?" she asked with a quirk of her eyebrow.

"This is not cereal," The Doctor insisted around his spoon. "This is Manna."

Tish rolled her eyes as the two friends finished their meal together. The Doctor poured himelf another large bowl of the cereal, while Tish sipped her peppermint tea slowly. "So, what happens now?" She asked when he had finished his second bowl.

The Doctor sighed and rubbed his hands over his eyes. "It depends on you, doesn't it? Tish, you have made it clear that this was going to be done the way you wanted, I can't see doing it any other way."

Tish nodded slowly. "What should I know, what are the risks, what are the procedures…" She stopped talking as the Doctor seemed to bore into her with an odd glare. "What is it, what?"

"Nothing," he insisted looking away suddenly. "You just, you reminded me of someone."

Tish tilted her head and eyed him slowly. "I should hope so, we are sisters." It was obvious who he meant, what Tish could not understand was his need to hide it. "Doctor, what went on between you and my sister?"

The Doctor's face became a stony mask; he rose from the table and placed his bowl in the sink. "Nothing. No thing. Not a damn thing, Tish. I would never…"

Tish folded her arms and tutted loudly. "Of course you wouldn't no matter how you felt inside. You aren't like him."

The Doctor placed his hands on the edges of the sink and seemed to need help standing. "What he did to you, Letitia, was completely disgusting."

"Because I am human?" she asked.

In one liquid movement, the Doctor was by her side. "Don't you say that, don't ever say that. Your humanity is what makes you far better than my lot ever dreamed to be." He sat across from her again. "Tish, what the Master did, it wasn't…I don't even know how it could have happened. Unless he, nah he could not have done that."

"He did," she nodded and tapped her temple. "The last time, the last night we were, he wa…"

The Doctor blanched at her assertion. "He bonded with you?" he spat.

Tish shrugged, unsure if that was the right term for it. He did that to me long before that last night, Doctor."

The Doctor knelt in front of her, "Tish, I want to do something to understand how...this happened." he nodded.

"Do what exactly?"

"I can go into your mind, see if there is any damage. See what the extent of it is."

Tish visibly recoiled at the request. "Go into my mind? Are you psychic?"

The Doctor smiled. "Not for each other we weren't not to any great extent anyway. But it works on other species. I can go in and find out for sure what we are dealing with..."

"What are the risks?" she asked matter of factly.

He smiled again then and shook his head. Tish knew what he meant, knew what he was thinking. "Why were you so terrible to her if she meant that much to you?"

HE stood, and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Tish, my life is strange, its aliena and foreign to anything you would understand. "

This looked around the catch all kitchen and shrugged. "We're all alien to each other, Doctor. Even back home. It's not enough of an excuse to treat someone badly. Its as if you were punishing her for your own feelings."

"Maybe I was," he spoke, but it seemed far away as if it was a revelation even to himself. Tish shrugged again and sighed. "The risks, Doctor Emo?"

"Ah, yes." he scratched the back of his head. "Nothing to untoward, I just want to see how dep the rabbit hole goes. There's no danger, Tish. Just might feel a bit weird."

"Weird, hmm that seems to sum up everything with you, doesn't it? All right, Doctor. Do your worst."

The Doctor knelt in front of the sitting woman, he brought his hands to her temples and leaned in closer. When his fingers came to her temples Tish felt an electricity that brought her back to the night that Saxon had touched her in much the same way. Where The Master's touch had been sour and heavy, the Doctor's intrusion into her mind was light and almost comforting.

Within seconds, the Doctor removed his hands and sat back onto the floor in front of her. He brought his hands to his face and shook his head.

"That bad?" she asked after a long minute of silence between them.

The Doctor nodded. "No, no, just..." he shook his head as if to shake the thoughts out of his mind. "I didn't know he had done that."

Tish nodded.

"But, it makes sense how this could have happened now. The baby, I mean. His connection to you, it makes it easier for probabilities..."

"this isn't about numbers and statistics, Doctor." she spoke. "I am a real and feeling being, with a very serious situation. I appreciate your level of detachment, but I would apprecaite more knowing you at least cared a little bit more."

"I am sorry," he started.

"Oh, don;t you give me that 'I'm so, so sorry' bit either, I am not asking for sympathy or pity, I just want to know you are going to handle this with a heart...or hearts."

He said nothing, but his expression spoke words he never would. She could tell he was mentally trying to come up with the right thing to say without coming off like a doctor high on a God Complex.

"Nothing to say?" she asked finally.

"You are in good hands, Tish. I promise."

"Guess that is as close as you are going to come to bedside manner, then." Tish studied him for a time. "You never said I would get so much from you on the other side of it."

The Doctor stood quickly. "What do you mean?" he asked menacingly.

Tish was not concerned with is demeanor. What he was trying to hide was so big even he could not deal with it. Big tough alien defender, scared of a woman. "You are such a coward." she accused.

He turned and left the room without another word.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX

"What did you see, Tish?" Martha sked, curiosity was always her downfall.

Tish looked at her sister with a small grin. "I saw you, Martha, and so did he."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX

She found him in the medical room, his backed turned to her, he seemed preoccupied with setting up equipment. She'd given him an hour to lick his wounds, but the ship had began to nudge her toward the medbay.

He knew she was there and spoke to her without turning around. "It's going to be tricky, Tish."

She came and sat on the bed in the center of the large room, "how so?"

"There are differences in the biological make up of the fetus, not quite human, not quite Gallifreyian. Makes the whole process dodgy." He stopped, then and cleared his throat. "The, uh fetus isn;t going to leave easily." he spoke still not looking at her.

Tish nodded from her spot. "Are you saying that I may have to continue this pregnancy?"

He sis turn then, came and sat next to her on the gurney. "No way." he smiled. "I'll not do that to you. The danger can be averted. I promise."

"What about the fetus?"

"Tish, we aren't trying to save the fetus. We are trying to make sure your sanity stays in tact." he sighed, removed his brainy specs and went on. "I can adjust the equipment to allow for the differences in physiology, but I will not do that until I am sure there will be no damage to you."

Tish looked down at her hands before speaking. "You have a lot of space agey Star Trek type of stuff here, can you maybe, create some sort of environment or artificial womb?"

"What are you saying, Tish?" he asked quietly. Tish shook her head, but the Doctor went on. "Funny thing about a bond, he would have had to have permission from your parents. Did you know that?"

Tish shook her head.

"But, he didhave them enslaved, and it makes it more...odd. The fact is, Tish, what he did to you, it isn;t real, but it is in your head. I could go in, make you forget it all."

"Could you remove what he did?" she asked hopefully.

The Doctor shook his head sadly. "I'm sorry, Tish, I can;t do that. There was a word he whispered to you, a word you probably don;t even recall."

"His true name." She nodded.

If the Doctor was surprised by that, he did not show it. Instead he stood again and began to pace. "Right, so in order to understand what is going on, I suppose I should tell you a few things. First, Gallifreyian biology is vastly different on the inside than human biology. You know about the obvious; two hearts, respiratory bypass system."

Tish nodded.

"But, our evolutionary scheduele dictated a need for bonding. Don't ask me why, Tish, its an extraordinarily long tale and I am sure you can read about the same things in yur history books." The Doctor smiled a bit and went on." Anya, the bonding defuses into exceptional parenting mechanisims."

"A healthy relationship makes for healthy offspring."

"Exactly. Now, the fact that the Master was able to-"

"Put the whammy on me."

"Right, put the 'whammy' on you made for your environment more receptive for breeding. I cannot tell you why he did it, I never understood him, not even when we were children."

"You've known him that long?" she asked.

"Never really knew him, but at one time, we were very close, Tish."

"So, the Master being bonded to me made it easier for me to conceive."

"You should not have been able to conceive at all, even with that. " He said.

Tish nodded, "but does that make it harder to remove the fetus?" she asked.

He shook his head, "No, its the inherent biological differences that present a challenge, but I love a challenge, me!" he smiled that manic smile that her sister had often mentioned. It was a smile that made you believe that anything, no matter how crazy, was possible, and completely probable. He moved around the room liquidly, setting up instruments that looked like something out of Star Wars. "Ultrasound?" she asked when he helped her lie back.

"Something like that." he nodded.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"It was amazing a full image of him, there. Two hearts, Martha, and surround sound."

Martha nodded, she knw first hand how cool the amazing stuff in the TARDIS was. "Is that what changed your mind?" she asked.

Tish shook her head. "Martha, the whole time I kept wanting to ask how we could sav him. The Doctor was open and honest with me, told me that I was lucky to be able to get the fetus out without any damage to myself. But..."

"But,"

"I never wanted him dead, Martha." she said with a smile. "Even when I found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted him to have a chance."

"But Tish, I don't understand, why?" Martha had always wondered the why, but the distance in time made it easier to ask. The sadness in Tish's smile was long gone, but left in its wake was a woman of sheer strength.

"It was this feeling, every time I touched the Master, I felt...odd. As if, as if everything would be all right, even when he was torturing me. It was so, Martha I cannot explain to you the emotions that his touch elicited. But, when he died, I thought I was free. I really did." Tish shuddered, "but, we both know that wasn't true, don't we." Tish fixed Martha with a look that confirmed her knowledge of what Martha was going through.

"How do you know, Tish? About me, how do you know?"

"It is not a far logical jump, Martha. It had to be I suppose." she shrugged. "But, you need to know, the reason I am sharing this part of my story with you, you need to know the truth."


	13. And You Remember Me

"You know, Tish," Martha began. "You keep saying there are things I need to know, I don't understand. You keep telling me I need to know something, but there is not a lot of what I need to know being told.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Are you sure this is what you want, Tish?" he asked as the image of the tiny fetus continued to hover in front of them.

Tish shook her head, "Yes, I am sure,"

"There is no guarantee that Martha will agree to any of this. I know what you are thinking, but it's not meant to be." He placed his fingers over his eyes. "I don't like the idea of you carrying this for rest of your life."

"Afraid of my sister?" Tish asked with a smirk.

"Who wouldn't be?" he asked as if it was the stupidest question in the world. "But Letitia, I am also afraid for you. It's a heavy burden to carry, and if that infant is never carried by someone else—"

"By Martha." Tish insisted with a nod.

"By Martha," he nodded. "Then it could be a lifelong battle for you, Letitia. DO you understand that?" she nodded but he went on as if talking to a nine year old. "This bond he made with you, its etched in stone. There is nothing I can do to undo it, it's as indelible as the baby himself."

She turned her gaze to the alien creature. "How do you know? Howe do you know it might meant to be? You travel in time, that doesn't mean you can tell fortunes."

The Doctor offered her a sneer and folded his arms. "It does mean that I have had a lot of practice with knowing people. I know the best of them, but I also know of the worst."

"You don't know Martha like I know her, Doctor. If you did, then you would be as confident as I am about all of this. "

He tucked his hands into his pockets but turned back to the screen. "It's just that, Tish do you realize what this will do to you?" you will have to carry that bond until he is either born or…"

Tish shook her head. "It won't take that long. Why does it feel like you are trying to talk me out of this, I thought it would be something that you would want, to not be alone anymore."

"Or until one of you dies, Tish. Do you understand? My people have an odd sense of romantic notions, and I can assure you, it's a miserable way to live without that other person. Can you really say you are ready to face another 60 years with that burden?" His voice had taken on a desperate tone. Tish surmised that he thought he was rescuing her from a dismal fate, but she had faith in Martha Jones."I'm not trying to talk you out of anything, I more than anyone else knows about how stubborn you Jones women are."

"Then what, Doctor?" Why the bombardment of negativity?"

The Doctor stopped, head held lower than usual, "I have always given people choices, Letitia, this is how I operate. I need you to know what you are getting into."

"And?" she asked with a gentle prodding.

"It might not work, she might not do it." he said in a near whisper. "I am not exactly her favorite person anymore."

"It will work out. You are not going to talk me out of this, Doctor. My mind is made up" She smiled and hopped off the table. So, what do we do next?"

The Doctor shook his head in obvious defeat. Letitia, I know you are confident of this happening, but I just want you to think for a second."

Tish brought her hand to his shoulder, "When you whispered into Martha's ear, knowing you were sending her off for a year to fend for herself, did you once question that she would do it?"

"I had the benefit of knowing the time lines, and there was no one else that could have done it." The Doc tor stopped and a far off look cascaded across his features. "There was no other choice, she was my only hope. Our only hope."

"Exactly! " Tish grinned. "I may not know time lines, but I know my sister. You gave her a mission, and she followed it to the letter and completed that mission with no variance from the plan. She will do this Doctor, I know she will."

He took the small woman by the elbow as they made their way through the corridors of the ancient ship. "Well, since you are so certain that you want him delivered alive, I must tell you that changes things here quite a bit."

"How so?" Tish asked

"It's going to be a longer stay before I can perform the separation, and a bit longer recovery. You will still feel the connection, of course. But, Tish, you will understand that the stasis will be a sort of prison for him. You will feel that too."

"I know," she admitted. "More the reason to get Martha on board, I just need to find the words to tell her."

"I could do it for you, you know." The Doctor offered with a sniff. "I mean, if it's too difficult…"

Tish smiled as she spoke. "You mean like you could go in and do the mind whammy on me, make me forget all this happened."

"You would still feel the bond, it would be worse without the rational memory."

"No shit." She chuckled. "No thanks, Doctor. I will tell my sister everything when it all gets too much. I don't want him to sit in that tube too long, but we are all still healing from what happened on the Valiant. Even you."

The Doctor shrugged as they entered the console room. "SO, Letitia, I feel it is my sworn duty, as your host, to take you anywhere you want to go. Anywhere at all." He added with a flourish. "Anywhere safe, that is. I think too much running might be a bad idea at this stage of development. But," he added/ "I think there are some beautiful relaxing places that will cater to your every whim."

"Every?" Tish asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Letitia Jones, I am shocked." The Doctor smiled. "But, I think I know a place that will make you melt into your stilettos."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Was there a lot of running when those doors opened?" Martha asked with a small smile.

"The running wasn't so bad. We ended up on a colony just hours away from revolutions. "

"That sounds about right." Martha nodded. "Wasn't too dangerous, was it?

Not as much as the tongue lashing I gave him for dropping us five hundred miles and two centuries from where he said we were going." Does he ever fly that thing right?"

Martha laughed and shook her head. "She flies where she wants, where she is needed. I kinda figured that out the day she hauled us off to Messaline." Martha grew silent, she pondered how to phrase the question without causing her sister any great discomfort. "How did you know I would do it, Tish? How could you have so much faith in my decisions? There was a pretty good possibility that I would never have done it, you know.""

Tish threw her head back and laughed aloud. "You're not serious?" she asked before laughing again.

"I was worried you would be offended by my question." Martha pouted lightly.

Tish laughed harder at her look of absolute confusion. "Oh, my dear little sister, don't you know? When we were kids, you were the one with the heart, and the sense of right and wrong. You were the one that couldn't walk into a fight without trying to appease both sides. As much as you try to deny it, you two are exactly alike. Can't stand to see someone in pain, especially someone you really care about."

"You two?" Martha asked as if she did not know."

Tish stopped her mirth and suddenly grew serious, "you and the Doctor, its like it was meant to be-"

"Tish, just stop." Martha huffed.

But, Tish wouldn't stop, she shook her head and went on. "He is in love with you Martha, has been for while. I think." she said then stopped and thought a while. "I think, he has loved you for a very long time."

"Tish, don;t do this." Martha said, her voice choked, strained against the strength she tried to maintain. "Don't put this on me, you know what I have been through, you know that I have been through hell since the day I met him."

The older sister nodded at the younger. "You are right, Martha. And I am just trying to find the right words to explain. When the Doctor went into my head, some of his thoughts bled into mine." At her sister's look of disbelief, Tish went on. "Martha, I can sit here and tell you how he felt about you, at least at the moment I knew. I can tell you what was going through his head, but, I think what would be better is for me to tell you what happened on Far Cry Nebula 3"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"How we feeling today?" The Doctor asked with his usual cadence, Tish appreciated that he never treated her as if she were fragile, or had lost some semblance of the strength she always felt she had.

"It's good, I'm good." In truth, it had been a week since she and her coffee mug had turned up on the TARDIS. A week of tests, vitamins, and sitting around with her feet up. The Doctor had informed her that if she was really was serious about keeping the baby, then more tests were needed. "And," he added over a dinner of homemade lasagna. "We have to wait until he is past the critical stage."

"What's the critical stage?" Tish asked. She had made the lasagna with a sudden craving for comfort food. She had insisted he sit with her and eat. The Doctor did not need to be told twice.

HE spread his hands across the table, "This is part of it, you are starting to bond with him, and he with you. This meal, Tish, he wanted to share in it, with you. With us, actually."

Tish placed her fork on her plate and stared at him. "Are you telling me he did this, I mean, made me do this?"

The Doctor sniffed. "It's no different from a human pregnancy, is it? I mean all those weird little cravings in the middle of the night, Perfectly natural means of communication between growing fetus and host." He took another large forkful of Italian pasta and sighed. "Really, when you think about it, it's rather the same."

"Wait, do you mean he has included you in this?" she asked.

The Doctor nodded. "Of course, I told you, my people were mildly telepathic. It stands to reason he is reaching out for any mind he can. At this stage, he needs the connection, he will need it much more after the seventh month. That is when the brain development happens."

"So he would need to be here, on the TARDIS The whole time? That means that Martha would have to be on the TARDIS, all the time, then."

"Wellll," he drawled. "It's not really that simple, Tish. See, the Gallifreyian child needs the security of both parents, and the brain connection of at least one. It is complicated, hence the need for bonding. It gives the child a better chance of survival." He stopped chewing then, "In fact, it's why we went to the looms, all that bonding, sorta fell outta fashion. We sorta ran away from the old ways in my culture…"

Tish nodded, she understood. It was like that on Earth, people get the idea that the old ways are the same as savage behavior. "What does that mean, then? How does that affect him? And if he is getting too close to you…"

The Doctor shook his head. He'll always have me, Tish. We are the same, him and me." He gave a small sad smile and pushed his plate away. "It's more of a gamble with Martha." He admitted.

"Do you think she won't want him?" Tish asked, suddenly burdened with the thought that Martha may still want her freedom. Plus, she had just become engaged to Tom. While all of this, on paper, seemed like such a good plan, the whole thing began to unravel before her eyes. In her haste to rid herself of a burden she never wanted, she had plotted to give away a gift that she was not sure someone else would want. Maybe she had led the false hopes go wild, and now the Doctor and the hope for him to have someone else…

"I wasn't thinking." She said suddenly, eyes boring into her plate. "I wasn't considering anyone's feelings in all of this. I would carry him myself, Doctor, but it's too much. The whole thing is too much."

The Doctor stood suddenly, hands placed on the table in front of him. "All right, time fro a trip. All this maudlin emo is too much, even for me. " he smiled down at her. "All right, where do you wanna go this time, Tish?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

""It's so beautiful." she breathed, helpless as she spun around in endless circles trying to take

Well, you did say purple was your favorite color. " He grinned.

Tish could only nod; the Doctor dropped to sit in the purple sand and began removing his maroon colored shoes. Like a child, he grinned as he dug his bare feet. "OOO you need to try this!" the Doctor insisted as he grabbed her feet and began to untie her shoes. She kicked at his fingers as he untied her laces, and laughed when she found herself in the sand next to him.

"You are about five years old, aren't you?" she giggled as he continued to pull her shoes off.

"Give or take a millennium. " he smiled back.

But, as her feet sank into the sand, Tish was grateful for his insistent immaturity. "Is the sand vibrating? Or have I finally lost my mind?"

The Doctor smiled bigger. "Bare skin and the reaction to certain microbes in the sand." He placed his hand on her ankles when she made to remove her feet. "Completely harmless, Tish. I promise. In fact, you are doing them a service, they eat dead skin,"

"I had a pedicure like that once," she answered, feeling as if she never wanted to leave that spot. The Doctor nodded silently next to her, but said nothing. The two friends sat with their backs against the TARDIS ankle deep in the purple sand. The afternoon sun danced across the beach and the purple tides lapped at the sands in front of them.

"This is the best trip to the beach I have ever had." Tish grinned digging deeper into the sand.

"This isn't even the best beach in the universe," the Doctor answer. "Not by a long shot." He turned to face her. "In fact, the best beach in the universe is actually on Hysteriax 7."

"Really?" Tish asked, caring far less than she could admit and still retain politeness. The fact was, the vibrating sand was lulling her swollen feet into the sweetest of comas that was spreading through her entire body.

"Really, it's got edible sand, and endless miles of turquoise water. The planet is literally one big beach."

"Sounds, nice, why didn't we go there, then?" she asked.

"Oh, you know…." He said easily.

"Doctor, what did you do?" she wanted to sound stern, but the corners of her mouth turned up into a knowing smile.

"Oh, just,… He drew out two pairs of sunglasses and passed one to Tish. "If you are ever in a situation where you have the option to go to a nude beach or not, Just remember, on Hysteralax, the answer should always be no."

"Wasn't ready for the nude Time Lord, then?"

"The name of the planet says it all, not allowed back until I change faces again."

"Well, this is much nicer than any old stuck up endless beach." She sighed. "And my feet thank you for this."

The Doctor's gaze followed to a small group of human looking people who were making their way in their direction. "Looks like we have company." The Doctor grinned. He stood up, his feet still in the sand and made his way toward the small group. Tish snorted at his need for constant interaction with others, a trait she had noted the last time they stopped at a planet and he got into a twenty minute dissertation with an inhabitant about the proper hanging of toilet paper.

"Over, not Under." She shouted at him, not willing to stand up.

"Do you even science?" he asked over his shoulder with a mock scowl. "Completely goes against the laws of physics." He made his way barefoot to the small cluster of people that had come onto the beach. They spoke for a time in voices that Tish could not hear and cared not whether she did or not.

She closed her eyes and felt herself sink deeper into the sand. IT was a loud shout that made her sit up, comfort forgotten. The Doctor seemed to be trying to flag her down as he was held by his other arm. Tish brought her feet to the ready position and charged after him. She thrtew her self between the large human male and the Doctor. "What seems to be the trouble?" swhe asked in her best Public Relations Nightmare voice.

The Guard neered at her from a height of seven feet, he folded his arms and it was then that Tish noticed the Doctor was handcuffed. "This your mate?" he asked with a voice that reminded Tish of when writers say someone spoke as if they had a mouth full of pebbles.

Tish looked at the Doctor, who gave her a slight smirk before raising his chin and speaking. "She is not my mate, we are friends. We came here to relax, there is no reason to place me in cuffs." he wiggled his bound hands for affect. "Well unless you re into that sorta thing, in which case I could be-"

"Not helping, Doctor." Tish grunted "Listen, whatever my friend here has donw, we will pay the fine and be on our way, yeah?" Tish flashed him a toothy grin that usually sent men to their knees, but not this time.

The large human male in front of her was not impressed, he stepped closer tot the Doctor and took his arm in his hand. "This man is a wanted criminal." he asserted.

"Well, I don't know about wanted. There are plenty of planets that don't exactly want me. I could name a few dozen right off the top of my head. Entire star systems actually."

Tish folded her arms and tried a different tack. "All right, so what are the list of charges?"

The giant pressed a button on his arm and soothing voice began rattling off a litany of charges, Tish stood still as she listened to the laundry list of offenses; everything thing from forgery and unlawful entry, to unlawful restraint and operating a time machine without a license. When that charge was levied from the still soothing voice, Tish turned to the Doctor with a look of horror.

"Failed that test," he grinned impishly.

Tish turned back to the large officious looking guard. "You can't be serious? This man has saved the galaxy more times than you can count."

The guard stopped the broadcast of charges and began to drag the Doctor along. "It's not for me to decide." he huffed.

"Doctor?" Tish asked, running to keep up with the retreating guard along the still vibrating sand.

"The Doctor turned to her with a careless grin. "Normal day, Tish. Nothing to worry about. " He raised his bound hands and wiggled his fingers at her. She noticed the sonic screwdriver hanging out of his pocket.

Tish flew into action, a burst of energy she ran in front of the large man and stopped with folded arms. "What is this really about? All of those charges, he would have been arrested long ago. What is this really about, then?"

"He knows what this is about," the large man spoke.

"I don't. Really." The Doctor admitted, but added with a grin. "But, I can;t wait to find out."

Tish gave him another look that made him clamp his mouth shut from any more words. She knew she had to buy some time while the Doctor worked his sonic. "No, there are rules, even in the universe, my client has a right to know what this is all about."

The guard, probably surprised at the small woman standing up to him seemed to be taken by surprise. "This, is about _The Infinite_."


	14. We'll Swim Into The Sea

**Still plugging away at this one, bout half way through. I don;t know how long it will take me to finish, work is insane, damn you real life. Thanks for all the nice words and encouragement. I really honestly plan on finishing this one.**

Martha's face must have been a warning of the subject for her sister, for the older woman smiled and patted her on the arm. "I didn't know about any of it then, Martha." Tish reassured her sister. "As far as I knew, he could have said Rosencrantz and Guildenstern."

Martha nodded, but her demeanor stayed tense. "But, you do know, don't you?" she asked, suddenly wishing for a hole of any size to open in the floor.

Tish sighed and allowed her eyes to roll to ward the ceiling. "Of course I know, Martha. I had to know what happened. It's all right, there is another side to that story that you have e no idea about. Are you going to let me finish, or—"

Heavy footsteps pounded their way through the hallway and into the parlor that had once been quiet. Jack Harkness appeared through the double doors, at his side was Leo who held onto the man in the middle of the two. John Bowman grinned from his position at seeing his wife. "There you are!" he sprang from jack and Leo's grasp,k only to trip over his own feel and land on his needs in front of Martha.

Martha looked first to her brother, then to her former boss. "He's pissed!" she accused.

"As a vicar on Sunday night." Jack nodded with a smile.

"You let this happen?" Martha snapped, she moved forward to help John to his feet. "You know he can't…" she looked at the two of them and shook her head. "You know he shouldn't…"

"Drinking game," Leo inserted with an easy grin. Martha could tell her brother was partially to the wind himself, "We were watching 'A Christmas Story,' and you had to drink every time the dad had a cursing fit."

That's the whole movie." Tish shook her head with a chuckle. "No wonder the-John is so wasted."

"Not wasted!" The man on the floor insisted, his head resting in Martha's lap. "I'm not wasted! I just," he stopped as if trying to find the right words. "I just need to recalculate my brain, that's all." John shook his head a little, "no, that's not right. Re—re—, " he seemed like a piece of film stuck in a loop. Martha had the brief but humorous idea of slapping him to keep him from repeating.

Instead, she held onto his hands as she stood to her feet and dragged him up. "Right, I am gonna assume that means a nap." She smiled, placing his arms around her middle. "Hold on for dear life, John."

"I have been for a long time," he answered and buried his face into her hair.

"Right, then." Martha said after the silence that followed John's admission. Both Jack and Tish offered matching smirks, while Leo seemed more than uncomfortable. "Say good night, John." Martha said as she took his hand and waved it to the three in the parlor.

"Good night, John." He said dreamily. "Hang on," his head came bolt upright, and in his moment of lucidity, it was surely the Doctor who came forward. "Who's John?" But, before anyone could panic, John's head fell back onto Martha's as she angled him up the rest of the stairs.

XXXXXXXXXX

Martha let go of John's arm as he slid onto the bed. "You 'll miss Christmas Eve Dinner." She sighed as she resigned herself to removing his shoes and socks.

John said little more than an airy tuneless sigh. Martha put away his shoes and p[laced the blanket over him. She had nearly made a clean getaway when his long slender arm shot out from under the plaid throw and grabbed her around the wrist. "Martha," he slurred. "Do you love me?" He asked as a child would ask a parent, as if he needed that bone deep reassurance. His eyes plead to her for an answer, and Martha, despite everything that she had been through in the last two years, could not douse.

Martha sat herself on the bed next to the prone man, a hopefully earnest smile on her face. "I loved you when I first saw you." She answered truthfully.

"Really?" he asked, lucidity hanging around the edges of his words. |You're so cold, sometimes."

She nodded, but turned away from his gaze. "I am." She agreed.

The silence in the room filled in every crevice, and for a time, Martha thought he had passed out. She rose and congratulated herself yet again on her ability to skirt around the truth.

"I thought things were getting better...l..." he spoke silently.

"They are." She offered offishly, but neither one of them believed it. "And, anyway, now isn't the time to try to figure out the state of our marriage. Get some sleep." She offered with a nod in the fading light.

John rolled over to his side and made a sound of noncommittal agreement. Martha shut the door behind her and headed back downstairs. Tish was holding Adric, walking him across one end of the room to the other. "I think he's hungry. " Tish offered the infant to her, and Martha took him in her arms and flopped back down on the couch. "So weird to see him like that," Tish offered with a shake of her head. "All out of control and unsure of himself."

Martha shook her own head as she fed Adric, "you have no idea, what it's like to live with him, day in and day out, and see this stranger parked in the spot where the Doctor should be."

"But," Tish began, placing her feet on Francine's coffee table, and act only performed when their mother was not in the room to see. "But, he is still the same person, I mean essentially."

"No, he isn't, Tish." Martha asserted.

"He still loves you." Tish smirked.

Martha sighed her answer, unwilling to get into a shouting match while hoping to get her son to sleep.

Tish read her doubt like the front page of the Times. "All right, story time. " Tish sang with a clap of her hands. "You finish feeding Addy, I will go make us yet another round of tea. Jack promised to keep everyone downstairs. "

You sound as if you have planned all of this." Martha accused with a smile to hide her discomfort.

Maybe I have, Martha." Tish said from over her shoulder on her way to the kitchen. "Maybe it's a lot of things that need to be said."

By the time Adric had fallen asleep at her breast, Tish set down the newly replenished tray of tea and biscuits. She held her hands out for Martha to pass her the baby, but Martha refused. Tish, on the other hand, would not be dissuaded. "How often will I get to hold him like this?" she asked quietly. "He's mine, and not mine, and I get that, Martha. I have no intentions of trying to raise him, none at all. But, having him close, it feels nice. Like a nephew. Oh wait…" She turned a smile to her younger sister. "I am going to pop him into the pram in the guest room, and then we can talk."

Tish returned with all the giddiness of her former sefl. "Now, where were we?"

XXXXXXXXXX

His face fell before her very eyes. "Ohhhh," he answered with a deflated voice.

Tish was quick to assess the situation, quicker than when she saw the sonic he was still working at pulling out of his pocket. "Why do I get the feeling this is something that has reared itself to bite you in the ass?" She asked under her breath.

The Doctor turned to the large security man at his side, still holding onto his ar,. "I don't know anything about that, it's a myth." He spouted.

"You used the technology, Doctor. It's you who must pay the sentence for it. That's ancient magic that has no place in this universe."

The Doctor opened his mouth to speak,, but it snapped shut again. Tish looked between the two beings before speaking. "Ok, let's pretend I know nothing about this." She offered, hands on hips. "What the hell is the infinite?"

But the large guard thing had begun walking again, pushing the Doctor from behind to keep a crazy speed. Tish skipped along double to keep up. It appeared they were headed for a ship in the distance. "Martha and I, we were sent to find the Infinite.. A half-crazed wanna-be tyrant was hell bent on universal rule."

"Do all your stories start like that? Or, is it just me?" She asked, still skipping along. The Doctor had managed to free his sonic, and Tish assumed he was either setting the right dials, or biding his time to find out what this was all about.

They had finally reached the ship, The Doctor wiggled his fingers to show that he was now free of the cuffs, but shook his head in warning for Tish. She understood eough of this man to know when plan was forming in his head, and honestly, she had to admit to herself she could not wait to see where this one was going. The guard moved to his ship, Tish assumed, to open the hatch to escort the Doctor inside, it was then that the Doctor cleared his throat and spoke. "Ah, I know this ship, well not this particular ship, but I know where it came from."

"No matter, " the Guard grunted. "We are going anywhere but to find the Infinite."

"You keep going on and on about this Infinite thing, but honestly, its a myth and nothing more than a cheap oracle that mirrors your heart's desire. Honestly it doesn't do any-"

The hatch opened and the Guard grabbed for the Doctor, who, to Tish's surprise allowed himself to be man handled onto the ship. "Funny thing about these ships." he began.

"Stop talking," The guard gruffed. Tsh made to follow behind the pair, but the guard raised his han to her. "Oh that was what I was waiting for." The Doctor spoke suddenly, producing his sonic in his now free hands. "As I was saying before." he went on, waving his sonic at the door. "These Alcadian ships, they aren't the brightest things in the world. Not like my ship." He fired his sonic at a panel ear the door. The guard jumped away just in time as the sparks flew and the hatch froze midway down.

"Your ship is brilliant," Tish beamed, suddenly glad that the Doctor was in control of the situation.

"She is, innit she?" he grinned as the guard began hitting random butoons on the side panel. "What have you done to my ship? How did you get free?" he asked, advancing upon the Doctor.

"Ah, now you see, the little lady here had a lot of questions-"

"Little lady?" Tish huffed but smiled.

"Oh, you lot and your Twentieth Century political correctness. " he smirked. "Tish here had a lot of questions, and you weren't ery forthcoming with answers. Now, you have a lot of questions of me, why should I even entertain answering any of them, hmm?"

The guard opened and closed his mouth a few times before raising his weapon. "You will take me to the Infinite!" he insisted.

"I will not! That thing is just a myth. D'you know, the last time I saw it, it almost killed my friend. You want that? Death? There are easier ways to kill yourself. Ways that don;t involve other people." The Doctor raised a finger and tilted the weapon away from him. "That thing is as useless as your ship, now." he twirled the sonic in his hand and grinned. "But, if you're nice, I may fix that busted down ship of yours."

The guard turned several shades of green, Tish had a flash of her own death as the seven foot alien raised the gun and fired. It clicked uselessly in his hands. "It is my right to have it!" the alien screamed. "It shows your hearts desire, and it gives it to you."

The Doctor shook his head. "It gives you nothing except a road to death. But then," he shrugged. "I guess you'll never know." He nodded toward the assembly of native police looking creatures making their way toward the trio. "Looks like your ride is here."

"It is my destiny!" The guard shouted. "It only shows what is real!"

The Doctor smirked at that. "True, your heart's desire must be near reality..." The Doctor seemed to go quiet at that. "I'd forgotten that part."

The police took the still screaming large alien into custody and thanked the Doctor. Tish waited for the pleasantries to end and walked beside the Doctor back to the TARDIS. "Its like this all the time for you, small little despots trying to undo reality."

The Doctor smiled. "Nah, sometimes its great big despots."

They walked along in silence for a time, "Doctor, what happened, with the Infinite, Martha was there?"

He nodded and told her about the thing that ate gold, and taking two years to catch up to Martha. He told her about the pirate ship and the planet of bugs. When he came to what tish knew to be the last part, he hesitated. They stood in front of the TARDIS, the Doctor with his hands shoved deep into his pockets looking at the purple sea. "Doctor, " Tish finally managed, knowing the answer, but wanting him to acknowledge it. "The guard said it can only show you what is meant to be."

The Doctor nodded with a funny 'mmmhmmm' but said nothing else.

"Doctor," Tish went on, leaning in front of the doors, realizing she would have to beat the answer out of him. "Doctor, what did Martha see?"

"Funny thing about one's heart's desire, the one that it shows. It could have been anything, eh? Her desire to be a great Doctor, or a family of her own...world domination? It reflects what that person is most likely to have. Oh, sure she knew she would be a doctor, we all knew that. And a great one."

"She is," Tish nodded, mostly to encourage his talking. The one thing anyone learns after enough time with the Doctor, is that if you keep him talking, eventually you get some sort of truth you can glom onto. But, Tish had always been one to push things, her mother had once told her she should have been a therapist. Nope, too touchy feely. But, this...

The Doctor seemed unwilling to go on, but just when she would have pushed, he spoke again. "Its funny that it was after then that I wanted to really push her away."

"What was her heart's desire, Doctor?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Martha placed her head in her hands and shook her head. "Oh I was so young and stupid."

"Still stupid if you are not hearing what I am telling you." Tish surmised. "Think, Martha. You saw your heart's desirem but it had to be something you were supposed to have. Don;t you get it? That is why that thing was so dangerous."

Martha wanted to open her mouth and scream a litany of foul curses at her sister. There was no way any of it was true. But, she turned to look at the blinking Christmas tree lights and realized where she was, ,where she was sitting, and who was upstairs sleeping in her childhood bed. "He loves me."

"Has for a while." Tish nodded with another sip of her cooled tea. "Sad really, the two of you. I don't think either one of you really want it, but there it is."

Martha had formulated a tirade but Francine picked that moment to call everyone into dinner. "That Doctor, is he all right?" Francine asked as Martha made her way to the large dining room.

"He's gonna have to sleep it off, and have one hell of a knocker when he wakes up." Martha answered, gently punching Jack in the arm. "How could you let him drink like that? You knew he couldn't hold it."

"That's what made it funnier." Leo answered. "Hey family traditions do not hold lightly on those too lightweight to hang. He shoulda bailed."

"He doesn;t know who he is." Martha whispered, afraid his super Time Lord hearing would kick in in his sleep.

Jack shook his head. "He'll be fine, Nightingale. Fully human, remember? He'll have a hangover and a lot of regretful apologies when he wakes."

"What did he do downstairs?" Martha asked." The room burst into gales of laughter that both Martha and Tish felt left out of. "Seriously, what did he do?"

The room only got louder =with laughter. Clive Jones, still clutching unto his newest grandchild wiped tears from his eyes. "You really had to be there." he laughed again.

"The man cannot hold his cups." Francine answered passing the plates around with a shake of her head. "Honestly, he is completely rubbish as a human. If you would have brought him home, and I didn't know who he really was..."

"You'd what, Mum?" Leo asked, grinning "Eviscerate him?"

"Hold on now Leo, there's still a chance of that." Clive answered with another laugh. "The singing wasn't so bad, it was the impressions that made me send him up to bed."

"Impressions?" Martha asked. "Oh god, he didn't." she looked around the room. "Tell me there are no pictures of this."

Ten phones were placed in front of her, various photos of John either making faces or laughing hysterically. Leo's wife had even taken video. "All right, that's it." she added. "None of these on Facebook or I will have Jack Retcon each and every one of you."

"Why you gotta throw me into this?" Jack asked showing his own snaps of John. "This is funny shit for later, when he is himself again."

"It is so strange to see him like this, so not himself. So, human." Francine added. "You have to understand Martha, we all know and love him, it's a novelty for us I guess.' she shrugged.

Martha nodded, she understood. If she didn't know any better, it was almost like, like he was family. "Well, just the same, no posting of those online. Its a matter of National Security." They all laughed at this. "Help me out here, Jack."

But, Jack raised his hands and shook his head. "Hey, you walk into the lion's den wearing sirloin boxers..."

She tossed a green bean at him. "Oh, you're no help." But, she knew none of them would put the Doctor in danger, she knew, even Leo's wife, held a special place for the odd alien that was passed out on her bed. It hit her then, he really was family.


	15. Come Lately and Quit What's Got You Down

**I really wanted to, but they would not let me. More to come.**

It was late when she climbed the stairs to her old bedroom. Adric was snug in her arms as she made her way into the room. He was sprawled out on the bed, her double was going to be a tight squeeze, but the Martha that would have minded was somewhere lost in Tish's story.

Had he really loved her then? Had he always harbored some deep longing for her that she was never aware of? The questions had bugged her all through dinner, and throughout the night as her family swapped ancient family mythos. Stories that had been told over and over but never lost their magic. Christmas had become less of a religious observance for her, and more of a time for her to be with people who meant so much to her. But, intertwined into it now were new stories, not so old, but still funny and poignant.

And somewhere, somehow, the odd man with the funny mannerisms and current self-imposed amnesia had become a part of that family canon.

"He's so odd." Francine noted over her cup of tea as the family sat around the tree after dinner.

"He's even odder as a human." Leo added,

"He's not that bad," Jack defended. "Still loves you though." He said to \Martha with a tip of his glass.

"Jack!" Martha warned.

Tish nodded, "I have to agree with Jack. He is so whipped." Tish laughed.

"You would agree with Jack about anything." Martha shook her head.

"For good or bad, I have to say I agree as well." Francine chimed in,

Martha felt a rush of otherness. She was seated on the sofa with her family discussing someone she once assumed would be a passing entity in her life. Yet, he had somehow become ingrained into her life. For good or bad, she was stuck with him, at least for another year.

"Don't look so surprised, Martha. It's not as if it isn;t written all over his face." Clive added.

"Not surprised," she faked, noting she had become far too good at the faking in the last couple of years. "Just don;t need my love life discussed over family dinner, thanks."

Leo threw a pillow at his older sister. "Like you all didn't discuss my love life the year I announced I was getting married."

"That was different," Martha asserted differently. "No offense, but you were too young."

"Here, here," Francine offered over her tea. "No offense Leigh," she offered to her daughter in law.

"None taken," The small but pretty woman answered. "It wasn't anything my family hasn't said. Or, is still saying."

"But it is different," Martha pouted. "All the things we went through, have been through in this family because of him."

"Now, hold on a sec." Clive returned. "We went through a lot, but that is nothing to say that the Doctor was to blame."

"No, " Tish spoke up from her spot next to Jack. "I would definitely say that the Doctor was not responsible for any of it."

"If anything," Francine finished. "That wild man really has saved us a few times."

The family gathered around the tree raised their collective cups in a toast of agreements.

Martha shook her head and rubbed her eyes. "Still." she shrugged.

"That's not to say he doesn't have some odd ways." Tish smiled.

"Sexy ways," Jack added.

"Jack!" the room retaliated.

"What?" It's true!" Jack answered with a leer. "You are a lucky woman Martha."

She didn't feel lucky, in fact, under the scrutiny of her family, she wanted to crawl into the basement and hide, but it was out, and if she ran then it was a sign of both immaturity and weakness. Neither of =which would have gone without notice. Instead, she did what she could to steer the conversation away from her. "He is still rubbish as a human; don;t know how lucky that makes me."

"At least he isn't dismantling anything, or talking nonstop and putting weird things in his mouth to see what it is."Tish offered.

"Oh, when she says something like that, no one complains!" Jack pouted, but relished the laughter that followed.

It was the cheer she carried upstairs with her, nestled alongside the sleeping Adric in her arms. As she placed him in the fold away cot near the bed and slipped her shoes off, she stood for a moment and looked at him.

He wasn't the same man she had known for so long, and yet, he was. Tish was right, a lot was bleeding into his existence as a human this time. In Farringham, he wrote things into a journal and secreted them away, as if there was a shame in who he really was, or a need to hide it from everyone. This time, it was really different. He was really different. The Doctor wasn't some fantasy man that he dreamed of, in fact he rarely dreamed of anything fantastical at all.

She thought back to the conversation she had had with her mother earlier in the day, that her mother's assumptions of the state of her marriage were never questioned. He had asked for her permission to be with Martha, and Francine had given it. Past that, the assumption of a happy ending was everyone else's. That is, until Tish cleared things up.

There were no obvious declarations of his love; Tish never reported anything more than what could be inferred. But, it was there, and he felt it, at least in his real self. His real self loved her, and the knowledge of that fueled her thoughts and heeped into acceptance as she undressed silently in the darkened room.

She slid between cool sheets that smelled of him, reminded of the first time she had laid in a bed with him. "Budge up." she whispered with a nudge to the sleeping creature next to her. She had said the same thing to him then..

John made a small noise of resistance, but rolled onto his side, She watched him as he slept in complete oblivion. Did he run in his sleep? Did he see fantastic things that the Doctor had seen, but the human could not put words to? He snored softly at her side, the weight of him in bed next to her lulled her into her own dreams.

XXXXXXXXXX

It had been a nice visit. Christmas morning found a groggy but ravenous John, confused about his actions of the night before but bleary eyes under the side long glances and giggles often posed in his direction by the rest of the inhabitants of the house.

"Is there something on my shirt? A sign on my back?" he asked over his third cup of coffee as they sat in the empty dining room. Christmas brunch had ended, and the two sat next to each other while everyone was outside playing soccer. Martha didn't mind watching him nurse his hangover, in fact there was something about his

Martha made a cartoonish display of first looking at his face with her head cocked, then looking behind him. "Nope, nothing." She grinned and took a sip of her decaf. "Must be post drunken paranoia."

John ran his hands over his face and offered her a small lopsided grin. "Never drink with professionals."

"Too right," she agreed. Martha could not help but watch him with a different eye. He sat clutching his coffee cup and looking out the window as everyone worked off the large breakfast. Tish's story had opened a door, one she was not ready to deal with, but had left Martha with the desire to be close to him, at least physically.

John rested his head in his hands and sighed. "I'm sure I'll find out what I've done soon enough."

"Yup," Martha agreed.

They sat together in that sweet still silence, Martha's had wanted to go outside for the traditional football game, but John's dreadful demeanor actually kept her inside. He looked miserably over his third cup of coffee, and Martha could not help t smile at the stories that her family had told her of a funny John when he was in his cups. Her father swore that his impression of Francine was dead on, but Leo insisted that the impression was far too similar to that of the one he did of Winston Churchill.

The rest of Christmas Day passed in warmth and happiness. By the time they were loading up their Honda for the long drive home, Francine was trying to convince them to stay one more night.

"We would," Martha answered her mother with a hug, "But we only have one more day off from work, and I have a ton to get caught up on." Francine seemed to understand, nodded at her daughter's words, but relented in handing over the small infant. "Can't he stay for a bit longer?" she asked, only half joking. "I never get to see him, and you two are always in the middle of…" She eyed the pair and noted Martha's glare. "Busy."

"I promise," John offered, gently prying the small child from his grandmother. "That we will bring him around more."

Francine folded her arms. "We will see how long that promise lasts, John" Francine spat back as she hugged her daughter one last time. "Get home safe, it's Christmas night, so most folks are on their way home from eating too much."

"And drinking too much, right, got it." John smiled as he left to warm up the car. Francine took the opportunity to take her daughter by the arm and speak openly. "What happens in a year?" she asked in a whisper as if he could here from the circle driveway.

It hadn't needed to be said, it was the question that Martha had asked herself a thousand times an hour. She shook her head and shrugged.

"I mean, how are you two going to keep him safe in that crazy existence?"

Martha blinked twice, not sure if she had understood the question. In the ten seconds since her mother had asked the question, Martha had formulated a million different choruses of "Wait and see" and "I'll deal with it later, Mum." She did not expect the question to not be about her.

"Don;t stand there looking confused, Martha. I feel better right now with him not knowing who, or what, he is. When I think of all the danger you two get up to." Francine said with the expected shake of her head.

"Mum, it's fine. One crisis at a time, yeah?" Martha tried for a reassuring smile to go along with the pat she gave her mother's arm, but the smile missed placating and just rang as sad.

"That's right, Martha. Think about it later. Have you given any thought to if those things show up here?"

"Mum it's under control. Jack, Sarah Jane and I, we have a system, a series of failsafes..."

Francine shook her head again. "It's all fine and well until one thing goes wrong. I love that little boy, and so help me, if either one of you place him in any kind of danger I will not hesitate to do my level best to bring the wrath of God down upon you."

"Would not expect less, Mum," Martha answered with an honest smile.

"Just so long as you know." Francine gave her daughter a fierce embrace before opening the door to the cold. John tapped on the horn and with that, Martha stepped into the cold suburban London night.

The ride home was long and damp. The sky seemed to spit forth an endless torrent of rain that turned into big wet flakes as they reached Manchester. John seemed unaffected by the stronger weather as he maneuvered through the sluswhy streets, but Martha clutched her hands together in her lap after turning down the radio and another glance back into the backseat where Adric slept.

"You don't trust me driving?" he asked as they made their way through empty sodden streets.

She wanted to giggle at this, he often operated machinery without a proper license, but the fake him knew like to nothing of the real him, so all that sat in the driver's seat was someone who thought they existed. That sudden thought made her both sad and sobered. "I trust you," she offered, surprised herself at the honesty in her own words. She really did trust him, whether it was long simmering, or had just popped into her existence after Tish's admission, she was not sure. But, she did trust him, and that had to count for something.

They made their way into the darkened apartment with the silent intention of keeping the three month old asleep for as long as possible. Martha placed the kettle on the stove as John eased out of the nursery and shut the door quietly. "HE should sleep for about a month." John noted as he made his way to her side.

"That would be a Christmas miracle. " she smiled. "SO, holidays with my family, not as bad as you thought?"

He placed his arms around her and pulled her into an embrace that, for once, Martha sought no repose from. Before she knew it, she brought her lips to his and kissed him.

Hi response was instant and heated. John brought his hands to her waist and responded her kisses with ardor. Martha brought her hands to his head, but John placed his on hers and slowly moved away. "Martha," he spoke in a choked voice full of the passion that sat between us. "I can't stop."

"Then don't" she answered, advancing upon him again. John was faster, he took her into his arms and held her with his head resting on her shoulder. "It's been so long.' he hummed as they stood in the center of their living room.

"Feels like forever." She answered as he swayed with her.

He lifted his head and looked at her. "Are we going to be ok?" he asked. The passion earlier was still there between them, but tenderness had crept into the spaces between, ardent mutual longing that was palpable.

She nodded, her forehead resting on his. "For the first time in a long time, I want us to be ok."

He nodded. "What changed? Not that I am looking a gift horse in the mouth. I would never look a gift horse in the mouth. You look a gift horse in the mouth and they tend to bite. Hard." His eyes grew large and round. "Martha Jones, are you a biter?

She smiled shyly before speaking. "It's not any one thing that physically changed/." she answered. Opening her mouth to speak again, to try to explain the deluge of emotion she suddenly felt, she instead found words lacking.

John stepped closer to her, his eyes burned fire and ice and reminded Martha of a living sun, only the fever within was directed at her. He glared at her as if he wanted to consume every cell in her body, and the consumption was certain to kill her or, at the very least, leave her burning inside. "I want you." he whispered into her ear as if there were a room full of people.

She nodded dumbly at his words, Martha did not trust her own mouth right now. Either choice she spoke could betray some part of her. She could not deny how she felt about the Doctor anymore, and she could not deny the man in front of her wearing his face. It was a dichotomy of emotions that led her to nod her head and take his hand.

He leaned into her and kissed the back of her neck, an action that made Martha stumble as they made their way to the bedroom. He placed his hands on her waist and drew her close. His kisses traced a necklace of fire around her neck, and Martha responded with hands that traveled over his back. She pulled his shirt over his head and he moved his hands under hers.

It was an eternity of moments before they lay on the bed together, still half dressed; moments ignited b touches and kisses. Moments that lit both of them into a burning white light of desire. He hovered over her, his face a contorted mask of need, want, and fear. "Why does this feel like the first time for us?" he asked in a husky near whisper.

"It always has with you." she lied effortlessly, then hated herself for it. "I want you to know, John..."

He looked at her with an intensity that nearly made her speechless.

"I want you to know, that no matter what happens, no matter what. I am glad for this." she smiled.

"Why would anything happen?" John answered with another slow kiss. "This is what we do, right? I mean, Addy had to come from somewhere."

He studied her expression too long, and Martha had to look away. The truth often kills fantasy, and this time, John was quick to notice the switch. "Martha, what is it?"

Martha shook her head, "it's been along time..."

John moved off the bed and began gathering his clothes. "There is something off here." he answered in a tone that reminded her of his real self. "Something's not right." He stopped, holding his clothes in front of him in a defensive stance. "Martha, tell me, what is going on here?"

Martha moved herself to a sitting position against the tasteful headboard of their once shared bed.

"I love you." she tried.

John cocked his head to one side. "I actually believe you. And that is what makes this so much worse." He turned and left the room. Martha wanted to commend herself for not crying until she heard strains of Liszt drifting through the still open bedroom door.


	16. Steal From The Tallest Cabinet

"Hey," he offered with a small sad smile. He offered those a lot lately, as he stood in the dorrway of her flat in London. He drew his coat closer around him, and Martha could not help but notice he was thinner.

"Hey," she smiled with a small hand movement ushering him into her flat. "Waas it a good drive?"

John shrugged and moved to the playpen in the center of the living room. "I make it every weekend now." he through over his shoulder and knelt in front of the playpen to lift Addy. "Hey my big guy."

Addy gurgled indefinitely and clapped his chubby hands. It tore at her to see how happy he was every time e saw John. "He missed you."

"I missed him a hell of a lot more. " John answered offishly but did not move his eyes from the baby as he jiggled him in his arms. "I'd drive a hell of a lot further to get to him."

Martha nodded and set the kettle on the stove. "Stay for tea?" she asked from the tiny kitchen. He often refused, and it hurt to see how fast he wanted to leave her place. Since she left Manchester, it had been strained between them. After Christmas, the two of them walked the floors of their apartment as ghosts, tied together by the string in diapers.

HE surprised her with his answer. "Yeah, that'd be good." he nodded stiffly and turned back to Adric. Martha set about making the tea, setting out the cups and spoons. She remembered the way he liked his tea, even kept his favorite here in London.

The first month after their Christmas, was a display of sadness and quiet distance. Sometimes, he sat at the piano saying nothing for hours; before that night, it was John's way of focusing. But, after that night, the quiet moodish brooding became something entirely different. The silences grew between them again, often, Martha found herself starting an argument just to hear his voice.

In the end, they sat down and had a grown up conversation that involved a lot of hard decisions.

"How's work?" Martha asked setting down the mug on the table in front of John.

He smiled then. "Still teaching, finals are over for the semester. I am going to have a bit of a breal...sorta one of the reasons I hung about."

Martha sat a safe distance across from him. Being in the same room, brought back the hurt, but it also brought back to her the love. Her feelings, recently opened, were poured over her skin and written in indelible ink. She kept in her head, the exact date where she could give him the watch. It made her laugh at times thinking of how she missed the person he is, that for a long time how she hated, then felt indifferent to the Doctor. Now, it was strk, her love for the Doctor, and her missing him.

"Hung about? And here I thought it was for the tea." she raised her cup in a display of affable distance. Their relationship now, their 'marriage' was all about distances. She lived in London again, and he still ived in Manchester, they had given up the expensive flat and he now lived in a small house close to the university he taught at. In three months, it was as if they had erased all of the lies between them. But, that had been the problem in the first place, hadn't it? Martha realized that the night he left their bed for the last time, he had seen something in her eyes, something that belied the emotions she was trying so hard to show. She loved the Doctor, and John was only an ersatz copy.

John shifted uncomfortable. "I was wondering, since I am off for a ew weeks, can I take Addy for the time I am off?"

Martha nodded, she figured he would want more time with him. It was no surprise to her how much he cared for the baby. In John's mind, it was his son,, without question "Why would I not? He is as much yours as he is mine." Martha answered, realizing how much truth were in those words. "Du you have everything you need for him?" She had seen his little house, two bedrooms and a postage stamp yard. It all happened so fast that by the time they had decided to live separately, it was Martha scrambling to find her bearings. John, however, seemed completely in his element thinking on his feet. More bleeding through.

He stood and nodded. "Of course I do," he answered. "I...I'm glad we can be such adults about all of this. It must be hard on him, not seeing me all the time. Not seeing us together."

"He misses the piano too." she nodded. "I have been playing BBC 3 for him a lot, keeps him clam. But, its not the same."

John nodded solemnly. "Not the same. We'll make sure to have plenty of music time over the next three weeks, won;t we?" he jiggled the infant and stood. "He has gotten too big for the car seat on the top of the piano, hasn't he?"

John was right, Adric had grown in the three months since Christmas. He had even begun the rudiments of crawling. "He's scooting across the floor now, so be careful of anything he can get his hands on."

"Right, and if he is anything like me, that'll be plenty!" John's smile faded into something odd, a look akin to one the Doctor would flash when he spoke of Gallifrey. "Right, ok, nothing on the floors."

"Three weeks is a long time..." she hemmed. Adric's presence took the edge off the loneliness, and Francine reveled in having him around the last two months, but her mother took every opportunity to waggle the fickle finger of fate at her whenever possible. Mostly about her marriage, partially about her failings. Francine was convinced that Mrtha should move back home with Adric.l That she was taking her own life and that of Adric's into dangerous territories by living in London. "So many crazies." Her mother would offer in all seriousness. Martha would sigh and politely decline, she knew this wasn't the place for her and Adric,she also realized it was a temporary situation until she could get the Doctor back.

"I miss the hell out of him." John spoke, but the rest of the words hung in the air, unspoken. It was never a question of whether or not he loved her, she knew that. Their separation was never about love, nor being able to live together. John was rubbish as a human, but he was still brilliant, he could tell she was not in love with him, and as much as it hurt, there was no amount of pretending that would change that. The man she loved was buried in there somewhere, but it would be another year before she found him again.

"I know," she nodded. "I just...No, its fine this is the right thing. You should have as much time with him as you can."

John smiled then; he shouldered the diaper bag and leaned in to kiss her cheek. "Thanks Martha."

She smiled back at him, wondered how long before she would lose her mind. She missed him as much as he missed her, but the human man standing in her door had no inclination to be placated with a lie. "Three weeks, then?" she asked with a forced smile. "What are you planning to do?"

He grinned then, more honest than her smile, "oh, you know. This and that. He's five months old, there is only so much we can do together. Maybe the zoo, maybe a few trips to the mall." He shrugged again. "Maybe we will sit around and watch bad television."

* * *

"You are keeping an eye on him, aren't you?" She asked the cell phone in her hand.

"Well, I wouldn't have to if you had completed your mission." The voice at the other end accused. Jack. He was none too pleased at the turn of events at the Bowman House. When the hammer fell, she had called him first, giving him a heads up on the situation. Jack had done little more than poo poo the situation, offering the location of a good adult toy shop to aid things along. When she turned up in London at her mother's doorstep, Tish had phoned Jack herself to inform him that things had definitely taken a turn that even Lover's Lane could not fix.

"Little late for accusations, Jack. I am not having this conversation with you. Again. Look, you know how serious this is—how much he means to me..."

Jack cleared his throat on the other end. "If it had been that important, you would still be ther."

"Jack, just look after them, ok?" Martha begged.

"Like you even have to ask that." He answered. "Martha, I realize things went a little pear shaped, and without sharing the details, I am sure you had good reason."

"We both did."

"But," Jack went on. "What is the Doctor going to say when he is back?" Is he going to think you abandoned him?"

"I think about that all of the time, Jack. But you don't understand it. I don't suppose you could. " She hung up the phone rather than go any further. Jack's heart was in the right place, as were everyone else's. But, no one saw it coming, no one knew the truth, and as per usual, Martha felt no need to fill anyone in on the gory details of her failed love life.

The empty apartment resonated in its silence. Usually, Adric kept up a steady prattle, or BBC 3 soothed him enough to sleep. Now, the steady ticking of the clock in the kitchen was slowly driving her mad. John drove down to London every Friday night to pick up Adric for the weekend, and dropped him off late Sunday. He never stayed long, and Martha understood that being in her presence was far too painful for him to admit. He had told her that last day, as they sat together at the kitchen table; that he loved her more than he could ever express in English, but he knew she did not feel the same way about him.

"It's something in your eyes, Martha." He said shaking his head. "I never saw it before that night..." He fiddled with the sopping teabag on the saucer, looking anywhere but at her. "I have to wonder if it's someone else…"

"There is no one else." She lied. But, was it really a lie? The questions would have immense time to ponder now that they had parted ways.

"Then there is somewhere else you would rather be, then." He added. "In any case, I was never good at coming in second."

Martha had said nothing, nothing could sugar coat the honesty in his words. She shook her head and sighed. "It's all rubbish, John. This does not have to end. Whatever you are thinking you see, or feel it's not wrong, but it's not right either …" she unfolded her arms in front of her, a sign of surrender she had hoped he would see.

"Sometimes," he began clearing the chunk she could hear in his throat. "Sometimes, I imagine it's the me before the encephalitis. That, somehow that is who you are pining for."

You have no idea, she thought bitterly, but swallowed the response that came to her mind instantly. The fob watches were safe and hidden, and as long as those were hidden, no one would find him, or Addy."That's not true, you are the same person, maybe there are subtle differences, but you are the same person, John."

He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. "We both know that is not true, Martha/. There are holes in my memories. Things that I only recall in halves, barely even tangible full memories.

He's left then, and Martha could not find the words to make him stay. There were none. She did not love John. Not like that, her acclamation of her love for the Doctor was still too fresh to try to angle in another identity. The irony was not lost on her. Here, she had fought against all that had happened over the past three years, only to be hit in the face with staggering and glaring admission of her love for the Doctor, only to have it end her relationship...with the Doctor. Sort of.

And here, now, she was alone. Sort of.

Now, she did little more than the occasional freelance work for Jack. He kept her jumping most weekends, and tried to keep her in London during the week. The odd weekday trips were fine by Francine. She fawned over the five month old in a way that made Martha consider moving to America.

But, the truth was, she felt bad enough having left him in Manchester. Alone. Martha prayed he would not find another Nurse Redfern. It was less jealousy and more fear of hurting another person the way he had her while he was human last time. The simple truth was, he had no idea who he was, and it left a possibility, or probability of heartache, pain and sorrow.

As Tish had once pointed out, some still bled through.

* * *

She'd been autopsying another dead weevil when her phone trilled in her pocket. Adric has been in Manchester for a week, and Martha, so desperate to get out of her silent apartment, had taken Jack up on his offer to have a three week working holiday in Cardiff. She had bailed on the idea at first; it was that first Saturday night when he made the offer. Jack and Tish had shown up at her apartment with food and an arsenal of alcohol.

"We are gonna get you plastered and take advantage of you." Jack smiled with an eyebrow wiggle.

Tish had nudged him. "What he means, Martha, is that Jack has an offer for you, and we both figured alcohol would soften the request."

"That's what I said!" Jack insisted with mock irritation.

Martha had shrugged and let them in; even let them get her drunker than she had ever been. \When Jack asked to spend the next three weeks in Cardiff; it wasn't the alcohol that said yes. A week later, and she sat in the Hub medical unit where she had given birth over five months ago. The rest of the team had left to investigate strange creatures in Birmingham.

She checked the ID on the screen; a Manchester number she was not familiar with. "Hello?"

The voice at the other end held a tone she was familiar with it was the clipped and even tone of a medical professional attempting to maintain a level of calm. "Martha Bowman?" The woman with the steely voice asked.

Her heart began to pound a steady and urgent rhythm as she realized the nature of the call. "What is it, what's happened?"

"Mrs. Bowman, I am trying to reach you to let you know there has been an accident on the M17. Your husband John and your son…"

She shook her head. "No, no please no…"

"Mrs. Bowman, we suggest you get here as soon as possible…"

"What is the prognosis?" Martha asked as she stormed through the halls of Torchwood.

"We suggest you get here as soon as possible Mrs. Bowman—"

"It's _Doctor_ Bowman!" she screamed into the phone. "Now tell me what's happened."


	17. And Make Your Favorite Sound

"Why should i? Why should I do something like this?| " John asked, shoving the offending object into the face of the dark skinned woman. "You think I'm stupid? That I don't know this is some insane tactic of yours to get me to forget about the truth?"

"John, please, you have to trust me." Martha chanced a look over her shoulder; Adric was nicely drugged and still sleeping in his oversized seat. She turned her eyes back to the road, scanned all mirrors looking for the orange truck.

John uttered a bitter laugh from the passenger seat; he threw his head back and held onto his casted arm. "Trust you, you?" Why the hell would I do that? You really do think I am stupid. I may be some simpleton in comparison to that big medical brain of yours, but I know well enough never to trust you again."

She had to admit the words hurt. Martha sighed heavily and reminded herself that this was why they had gone into hiding in the first place…that he would be himself again soon. "You need to open that up, it's the only way all of this." She waved her hand around gesturing to the outside of the ambulance they drove in. "It's the only way you can be you again."

John sniffed loudly and for a time, Martha worried he would roll down his window and chuck the watch out. Surreptitiously, she flipped the child safety lock on her door, make asking for forgiveness silently as they drove through the night.

John looked out the window, and Martha knew it was because he did not want to look at her. She could not blame him, as a human this situation would have ended friendships, let alone marriages. But, it was different for him, for them. He had to know who he was; otherwise, the earth would be swallowed up.

His voice came from the other side of the ambulance. "I need some answers, Martha. You at least owe me that."

"I owe you everything." She nodded. "You owe me nothing; whatever you want to know, John, Doctor. " She looked over at him, and for a moment their eyes met, for a moment he was the mad alien again, not some human man in enough physical and emotional pain to have done anything.

"Then tell me the truth." John insisted. "It's a long drive to Cardiff, and I am pretty sure you locked the doors."

Martha nodded, turned to give the infant in the back one last look, and then began to speak.

_**20 Hours Earlier**_

It didn't take a year of walking across a destroyed planet for Martha to realize that she was being followed. Cursory glances out of her mirror as her speeds exceeded both legal and rational levels, told the small woman that there was a small blue car tailing her.

Martha warred with her sense of urgency to see about her family and the adrenaline of the chase. It was not hard for her to imagine who was behind her, not a far stretch to figure out the coincidence of the car accident and the chase were little coincidence at all. She cursed into her window as the small American car darted around traffic to its steady two car pace behind her.

She tried to shake it, some of her vast UNIT training came into play with dodging the tail, but the car behind her was relentless.

She really wanted to be at the hospital with Addy and John, but she knew it was really risky to lead whoever, or whatever was behind her into the safety of the Doctor's hidden persona. She figured whatever was behind her, knew her association with him.

Her phone to her ear and one hand on the steering wheel weaving through traffic, Martha through caution aside and called Jack.

"You're where?" he asked from what sounded like far off. Martha could hear a steady thudding and the sound of over active technology.

"On my way to Holy Sepulcher Hospital, outside |Manchester."

"Interesting choice, you know there are plenty of hospitals in the Cardiff area. Most of them even use disinfectant now. Why are you-"

"There's been an accident, Jack." Martha clipped. "Apparently your friends at Torchwood dropped the ball. John and Ady are in hospital. I don;t know how bad it is."

"Ill be there in ten."

The hospital outside of Manchester wasn't the same one she worked at for three months. In fact, it was one of the ore up market deals with private funding. After a four and a half hour drive, of which she could barely recall any of, Martha pulled into the posh parking lot and ran into the front doors.

The reception desk must have been on the lookout for a psychotic woman bursting through the doorway. One look and the young bookish looking woman at the desk leapt from her seat and met Martha. "Doctor Bowman." She asserted. "This way, I will take you up."

"Up where?" she asked meeting the steady cadence of the young woman. "What department?"

The woman hit the elevator button for the fifth floor and spoke in that same clipped, even tone that the woman on the phone had spoken to her in. Martha recognized the tone, had spoken in it enough times to know when shit was about to get real. "The NICU first, " she nodded. When Martha opened her mouth to ask a barrage of questions, the woman held up her hand and shook her head. "I am not authorized to give any information, Doctor. But, the staff is aware of the situation and are available for you consultation."

Martha made a mental note to be much more forthcoming next time she had to give any news on a patient. It was one thing to stand in deference to medical jargon and bureaucracy, wielding knowledge as a placard of professionalism. It was quite a different feeling being on the other end of the double speak.

The elevator doors opened into a sterile environment. Martha scrubbed her hands without being reminded to and donned the yellow coverings. "A tall woman in pink scrubs met her at the door and motioned for her to follow. "I'm nurse Jefferson." she announced. I am the nurse for your son. His name is Addy?"

"Adric, actually, Martha corrected. "What's the prognosis?"

Nurse Jefferson was all business as she led her to the far corner of the large room. The other beds were occupied by children in different stages of consciousness. "Adric was lucky, the lorry t-boned the side of the car he was not on. The car seat protected him from most of the damage."

"Why the NICU, then?" Martha asked, but when they reached the bed that Adric was in, there were no questions necessary. One side of his body was casted or bandaged. Martha caught her breath as she took in the site of her son attached to machines and a ventilator. "Is he conscious?"

The older woman nodded." He is sleeping right now. His vitals are good, he came through surgery fine, no reactions to the anesthesia."

Martha placed a hand on his tiny unbandaged one and let out a ragged breath. The nurse went on rattling off a series of medical terms that Martha had only known in books and diagnoses. "His father was driving."

Nurse Jefferson nodded and flipped through pages on the chart at the foot of the small bed. "John Bowman?"

Martha's ears raised and pricked at the sound of finality in the older woman's voice. "Where is he?" She asked as calmly as possible.

"Still in surgery." The woman assured her. "But, the Doctors need to see you as soon as he is out. There are..." she tilted her head a bit and looked at Martha with a sidelong glare. "Inconsistencies."

Martha raised her chin in defiance; she could only imagine the inconsistencies that Nurse Jefferson had referrenced. "They can find me here when they need me." Martha answered stoically; seating herself into the chair at the side of the infant's bed.

The nurse nodded and turned to her thick heel. Martha tried to focus on Adric, and not on the implications of John still being in surgery.

"You shoulda called m sooner.." Jack spoke crisply; he had turned up on the other side of the bed, leaving Martha to only guess how he got in when it was parents only. "I would have brought you here."

"Sort of an emergency situation—"

"Which is exactly why you should have called." Jack insisted, moving closer to Martha. He stood towering over her in the small space.

"Sorry, had to leave in a hurry." Martha defended, not turning to look at the immortal man next to her. "In case you cannot tell, my son is in grave danger." She finally did turn to Jack when she spoke again. "Did you bring them?"

He nodded and dug into his pockets. "Nice text message. A call would have been better." He passed the items to Martha. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Martha ignored him but took the watches into her hands. "No," she answered honestly. "But the choices have been taken out of my hands, haven't they?" Martha pocketed the watches and leaned over Adric's sleeping form again. "I am just going to do Addy. The doctors sy that John is fine, a few broken bones but nothing too life threatening."

Jack nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets. "I really don't know how this all happened." he shook his head. "Bit, if you are all right here, I am going to go try to find out why Torchwood Four dropped the ball on this."

"Jack," Martha called to the American's retreating form. "This was no accident."

"I figured as mush." he nodded, still not meting her eyes.

"I was followed, on the way here A car," Martha described to vehicle to him and Jack did finally turn back around.

"You think it's them?" he asked. "You have more experience with this lot, I only read the reports from the archives."

"I think," she said. "That I would feel a hell of a lot better with a few armed guard and a gun."

Jack nodded and tossed her his side arm. "Keep it, I got another one." he opened his coat to show her his shoulder holster. "You stay in here with him, I am gonna go check on our friend a make a few phone calls."

"Let me know how he is." Martha spoke quietly.

"You haven't seen him yet?"

Martha shook her head. "Adric is first priority. Its the one thing the Doctor and I agreed upon. No matter what, I have to be here with him."

"That's alien logic, " Jack warned. "It's not gonna work real well on a human who wakes from surgery alone."

"It's what we agreed on Jack."

"You're his wife, Nightingale."

"I am estranged from a human man." she took a deep breath and found her voice again. "It's not him who I am married to, Jack."

Jack nodded slowly but left the NICU without another word. Martha let out a sigh of relief at his departure. He meant well, but if anything was following her, it was a sure bet that whatever it was would want to get to Adric to get to the Doctor.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Twenty minutes after Jack left, the older nurse appeared beside Adric's bed. "When will he waken?" Martha asked, then kicked herself for already knowing the answer. It was strange to need comfort at a time when her training screamed at her to be as impersonal as possible. "I'm sorry, it's just..."

Nurse Jefferson placed a comforting hand on her arm. "It's all right. Adric will wake when his body is ready to. Your husband is out of surgery, he is in recovery now. You could go and check on him if you like."

She stood and stretched Jack's words rang in her ears. Maybe she could go and see him, make sure he was alright? "Is he in recovery?"

The nurse nodded and began checking the machines connected to the infant. "Adric will be all right, he is pretty stable. We won't know about any head trauma until he wakens."

Martha nodded, she knew it was better to do a CT scan on an infant when awake. It was true what she had told Jack, one of the few things that she and the Doctor had agreed upon. In all cases, Addy came first. Marta looked down on her son as he slept, she fingered his tiny hand and he moved in his sleep, but did not wake. She checked for the weapon tucked into the back of her jeans and smiled. "Guess I could go in and look in on him real quick."

Nurse Jefferson smiled but continued making annotations in Adric's chart. Martha turned to bid one last good bye to the infant, and all hell broke loose.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Martha, what is it?" Jack asked in a hushed tone that was either due to the location, or keeping John out o earshot.

"It's Addy, he has gone into distress."

Jack's voice cam through stronger, his tone all business. "What do you mean?"

She took a sharp intake of breath to keep her emotions on lock down. "I don't know, I don;t know anything." All around her, in the small ante room of the NICU, a flood of white coated professionals created a steady stream in and out of the double doors.

They'd dragged her away, made her leave. When the machines began to squeal, she was told to get out. "They haven't stopped working on him, Jack. I've heard words like brain bleed, convulsions..."

"Martha, get a hold of yourself. You know the routine here. Whatever has happened, it will be all right. They have the situation under control/"

"I'm a doctor, I should be in there."

"You know the answer to that, Nightingale." Jack's voice had taken a harder edge, yet clipped at the edges of serenity.

"I'm his mother!" she screamed.

"Exactly." Jack answered. "Martha, please stay calm. I'm on my way down."

"I'm going to open the watch, Jack." Martha spoke evenly as she turned the small timepiece in her shaking hands. "I think its the only way."

"Think about this real hard before you do this, Martha." Jack clipped. "You were followed here."

"I know, but my son is in there in an unknown condition." she sniffed, feeling her carefully constructed control failing. "He's not human, Jack. Maybe this is what I am supposed to do."

"Martha, if something is following you, how do you know this isn't part of drawing the Doctor out?"

"How do I know it's not?" she asked For the first time since all this happened, she really wished he was there, that he could march into the room and take control of the situation. "Jack, I don;t know what to do." It came harder than she realized to admit.

The doors to the main room opened, an older man with glasses and thinning, gray hair stepped out, his face wore the steely mask of judicious ambiguity. "Mrs. Bowman?"

"Gotta go, Jack." she spoke and hung up the phone. As she stood to meet the doctor, the watch slid from her hands and hit the floor with a clatter. In an instant, it opened, the warm golden light poured from it. Martha left it on the floor, barely concious of it's actions as Doctor Harris explained Adric's sudden downturn.

The sudden cessation of alarms and panic from Adric's side of the room was nearly instantaneous. Through the open door, Martha could see the herd of medical professionals step back from the tiny bed and look at each other.

Just as Doctor Harris turned to see what held her attention, the outer doors opened, Jack Harkness burst into the room. "Change of plans, Jack." Martha announced motioning to the fallen watch.

"Right, " he nodded, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I'll deal with this one, you need to get you friend upstairs calmed down."

"Deal with it?" she asked shrilly, motioning to the situation in the ward. "In about five minutes those doctors and nurses are going to be privy to the greatest medical mystery of their time."

Jack shook his head. "I have a team on the way, Torchwood really did drop the ball on this one. I got this overed, we can be out of here within five minutes. You need to go upstairs to John's room and convince him to come with you."

Martha shook her head. "I can't leave him here," She realized that she was waving her arms and screeching like an insane woman, but in truth, it was actions she had seen repeated a million times in her rotations at the A and E. Desperate mothers all spoke the same language.

"I got this," he assured her, "we know Adric is fine now, you need to go up to John's room. He's-"

"He's what, Jack? Dead? Disarmed? Disfigured? What?"

Jack shook his head. "I need you to get him down here, the ambulance bay, in five minutes. That is all the time we have. Those things, the watch got opened. If they are around, they are going to descend upon this place. Martha, think." he implored the shaking woman. "The Doctor would not want those things to march in here, think of all the lives that tey could ruin here."

She knew, in her very soul she knew what he would want. In that instance she realized she knew the Doctor better than she knew anyone else in the world, the universe. Martha nodded and turned toward the doors. "Ambulance bay, five minutes."

"You'll need ten." he warned her. "Make it five."

John's room was on the other side of the hospital, Martha sprinted the entire way, noting to herself how similar all hospitals were in thei mapping. His room was on the recovery wing, on her way ipast the nurses' station, she grabbed a white coat and a wheelchair.

She had expected much worse when she opened the door to his room, but John was sitting up drinking tea with his left hand, his right arm was housed in a tension cast.

He lifted turned his head when she entered. "How's Addy?" he asked in a raspy voice.

"I thought you just had surgery?"

He pointed at his casted arm. "Broken in ten places, don;t think I will be playing much piano in the near future." John shrugged. "I asked a question."

"Right, yes, Addy is fine. Better than fine. We gotta go." she said, gesturing to the wheelchair.

"Go?" he asked. n"To see Addy?" he turned and moved his legs off of the bed. "Hang on a sec, why are you taking me to see Addy?" A sudden look of steely anger flushed over the man's features. "I'm not going anywhere with you."

"John?" she both asked and pleaded. "Please, let's go see Addy, yeah? Let's go see our son."

"Our son?" he asked with a sneer. "Don't you mean, _your_ son?"

"John, please." she asked realizing he had somehow been made aware of those inconsistencies that the nurse had spoken about. " We have to go. Now."

"Not until you tell me where Addy comes from. Who was it, Martha? Did you think you could fool me all this time? Didn't you think at some point all of this would come out?" John swept the cup of tea onto the floor. It fell with an amazing clatter.

"I don't understand what you-"

"He's not mine!" John screamed at her. "The blood doesn't match, Martha! Fathers with O positive blood do not yield offspring with A negative blood. I may not be some hot shot doctor, but even I know that."

"John, I can explain everything, remember, you lost a lot of your memories when you had –"

"Encephalitis, yeah, yeah, I know. But, funny thing is, none of my records show that. In fact, when they did my cat scan funny, no sign of it. At. All."

"John-"

"Blood don't match, blood don't match." he sing-songed in an eerie tuneless way. "Shoulda known, aall that time, you wouldn't even touch me..."

She cringed at his words, cringed again when the other items within his reach began to hurdle across the room. His anger was legendary, and Martha wondered if that was something else that had bled through. "You need to come with me, now."

"Why should I?" John asked in a too calm voice. "Why should I come with a lying bitch?"

"Because," Martha answered with her cleverest smile as she pointed the gun at her husband. "I'm the lying bitch holding the gun."


	18. When There's Too Much To Get Rid Of

**Hope ths is good, sorry updates are taking so long, but real life is a bitch, as we all know. I am not abandoning this one, just need longer time between updates. **

The car veered around late morning traffic. Martha chanced a look at the man next to her, and he chose to ignore her. "It's a lot to take in." she nodded by way of small talk.

"It's all bullshit, isn't it?" he asked her with a pointed look that nearly tore her heart into pieces. "This is all some crazy cooked up fantasy to make me as crazy as you are." He studied her for a full minute before going on. "Martha, are you sure you are feeling all right?" he gentled.

She nearly drove off into an embankment; his tone was one of a psychiatrist talking a mental patient off the ledge. She had expected that, had expected some level of assumption of loss of sanity after explaining things to him. What she did not expect was the honmest tone of his voice; the concern that seemed to leech through every syllable. He was, in his mind, trying to deal with a crazy woman. "I'm not crazy, John./" she insisted. "You are the Doctor, and I know it sounds mad and mental, but it's the truth. Martha looked at her watch and checked the nearest mile marker. "We're about an hour inside of London proper, once we get there, you'll see."

"See what?" he asked in that same gentle tone, but now edged with a tone of a man who was rapidly reachi9ng the end of his rope. "Oh right, the TARDIS." He nodded saliently, but spoke with that same tired and even tone. "We are going to the magical blue box that contains all of time and space. "

"It doesn't contain all of time and space." Martha answered with a shake of her head, "Just…has access to all of time and space. God she really did sound like a lunatic.

John nodded slowly and glanced into the back of the small ambulance. "I can't believe he is sleeping through all of this. " He shook his head as if that was the most incredulous thing he had heard today. The idea of it made Martha laugh out loud.

John answered her giggle with another cautious look, and Martha could have sworn she saw him check the door again. "Tell me where Addy comes from." John asked after the door offered no exit into sanity.

Martha nodded. I wondered how long it would take you to ask me that one."

"I almost don't want to know." He answered sadly. "He has been mine for six months. Longer if you count the pregnancy. For as long as I can recall, I guess." John finished with a resigned shrug.

In that moment she felt bad for him, miserable. He was like the John Smith that stood in the small cottage insisting he was a real person. John Bowman was no different, faced with the idea that his life, albeit short and riddled with memory loss, was nothing more than a lie, the middle aged musician pulled a face of absolute disbelief. "I don't know what to say, john." She shrugged against the honest look of woeful confusion on his face."

"Tell me the truth, that's all I ask Martha." John said in a small childlike voice.

Martha could do nothing but nod again, "Ok, I will tell you everything." She looked at her watch again and did a quick calculation. "Should be all done by the time we get to London."

John nodded his agreement and spoke. "So….Adric? where is he from. Really?" His eyes seemed to want to flow at any moment, and Martha sighed with exasperation. "He isn't mine, is he"

"He is ours in every way that counts." Martha asserted.

For the second time during the ride to London, Martha spoke about the Doctor in the third person.

_**Fifteen hours**__** earlier.**_

"So you are holding a gun to me now?" John asked with a grin that spoke of the Oncoming Storm. A grin that, very nearly, made Martha put the gun away. Very nearly.

She looked at her husband coldly, head cocked slightly and eyeing the prone man for any sudden movements. "Yeah," she nodded slightly. "Yeah I guess I am."

John sneered at her but did not move. "You really expect me to believe you will use that on me?" he asked, but before the completion of his sentence, a whirring wind passed near his leg and left a tidy whole in the bed.

"Next question?" Martha asked in a steely voice. The room door flapped open, but Martha was fast to slide her foot behind her and bang it shut again. "Broken glass," she said without blinking. "I've got it/"

But the person on the other side of the door was insistent, and Martha was completely out of patience. She flung the nearby wheelchair. It was operational from folded with a mere flick of her free hand. "get in the chair." She ordered the still grinning man.

John didn't move, and Martha wondered if he would start screaming about being held hostage. Just when she was about to say something to him, he moved silently and carefully easing himself into the chair.

Martha moved her foot to allow for the entrance of the impatient staff. She grabbed the handles of the chair and wheeled John around toward the door. "Sorry, he had a little trouble getting up." She smiled at the two irate looking men. One was a nurse, but the other was clearly security of some sort, Martha noted the hard edged look on the man's features, as if a glower alone would keep injured psychopaths and would be baby thieves at may.

The security person noted the items on the floor, and then looked at the casted man. "Is everything all right?" he asked John with a small grin.

John nodded and raised his broken arm. "Got a little too friendly with the nightstand."

"And side table." Martha amended with a small smile.

"And side table." John added with little mirth.

"Anyway, we are going to go visit outr son in the NICU. Figured now would be a good time so you can clean the mess?" Martha asked as she wheeled John into the hallway.

"Yes, let's go visit _our_ son, love." John pushed with an emphasis and a too broad smile.

They moved down the hall wordlessly, John seemed more in a pout than afraid of her, and Martha was still surprised that he said nothing to anyone about being held at gunpoint. By the time they reached the ambulance bay, Jack and another man stood there amidst a row of white busses. "I see you managed to convince your husband to tag along." Jack noted taking the wheelchair from Martha./

"Jack," John groaned, his head hit the back of the chair. "You're in on this madness too?"

Jack smile grew and he patted the shoulder of the injured man. "We need to get you and the Missus out of here, with Addy. " he turned to Martha then. "I found out what happened."

"Is it them? Is it the Mayflies?" she asked.

Just then, the man she did not know moved forward. He held out his arm, but Martha refused it with a withering look. "Scott Millerston." He announced with a less than smooth glide of his hand back into his pocket.

Jack began leading them to the last two ambulances in the row. "He's Torchwood, the one that screwed up." Jack answered with a tip of his head toward the ginger stranger.

"We didn't know, Jack. It wasn't as if we had a lot of dealings with this sort of thing...not like Torchwood two has."

"You deal with aliens every day," Jack spat back acidly. "You should have had someone there who knew who she was."

Martha flashed him a hateful look as they stopped between two ambulances. "So what is the plan?" she asked.

"You don't want to know what happened?" Jack asked helped to load the large incubator into one of the ambulances.

Martha shrugged as if a fly had landed on her arm. "I just want to get my son out of the fray. If it's Mayflies, then we need to get out of here, as fast as possible."

Jack helped her load the incubator into the back of the ambulance. Adric slept through the entire process, he stired slightly before curling into a fetal position. "He's going to want to know...you after he is him again."

"Then he can find out, I am not concerned with anything more than what I need to do to get us to the TADRIS before they figure out where it is."

Jack nodded resignedly. "All right, we take the spent watch in that ambulance, Scott and I will driv to try and throw them off the scent. Adric is pretty well encased in that incubator, should deaden the scent. But..." He turned to the man with the casted arm who still sat in the wheelchair sporting an angry look of absolute betrayal. "He is gonna need to open that watch and deal with them."

"Are there many?" she asked as she tightened the straps of the incubator, she secured the straps with her foot and pulled to take the slack.

Jack was on the other side, mimicking her actions they worked in unison. "Yeah, its them, not too many, at least not that we are aware of. But, we need to put a rush on this and get you folks on the road." He stood up afterward and looked at Martha. "It wasn't Adric or the Doctor that put them on the scent."

Martha stood then and glanced outside of the ambulance. John still sat in the wheelchair, Sctt stood at his side, a gentle but firm guard against any attempt he could make at running. "So what does that mean, Jack?" she asked still looking out the window.

"I think you know what that means, Martha."

She nodded then, "we need to get out of here before they come." Martha turned on her heel, leaving Jack to follow in her wake, nearly double stepping to keep up with the small woman.

"We are going to try to lead them North. "Jack spoke from the ab of the ambulance. "We are going to drive to your old house, then try to get back to Four. We are going to try to double back and come to London. You know where."

She nodded, of course she knew where. Martha knew she had to get the Doctor back home; back to his TARDIS. Getting him to open the watch was only secondary, she knew John Bowman would fight for his life, fight like John Smith had. Martha had tried everything then, even a stilted and rejected attempt at professing her love for him, a love she now realized was the foolish misguided infatuation of a spoiled girl. What she felt for the strange creature now was something different, yet still paled in comparison to what she would do for the tiny creature in the ambulance. To understand love, real love, one had to go outside of themselves, to become something different than what they had ever been. She had shorn that skin the minute she held Adric in her arms.

Martha had to get the Doctor back to the TARDIS, because he was the only one that could keep Adric safe. Anything she would do, could do, was only staunching the flow of the inevitable. With the baby's essence back into his tiny body, he was more vulnerable than ever.

They helped get John buckled into the front seat of the ambulance, and Martha was both shocked and saddened at the difference in the character. She had always hated how the Doctor could be so cold and emotionless, even with all of his manic smiles and cheeky speeches. He could walk into a situation and take control in one sentence.

Where John would not create a fuss, nor cause any undue stress in a situation, the Doctor was the fire burning in the center of everything. \she hated to compare the two men, but how could she not? Plenty of him had bled through, but there, in that moment when she climbed into the driver's seat of the ambulance prepared to be chased through the fires of hell, she truly wished for the man who always had flame retardant skin.

An oranges truck made a lazy turn around the parking lot of the hospital as the two ambulances pulled Away from the circular drive of the ambulance bay. The truck parked in front of the emergency doors.

Martha watched the scene unfold from the side mirror of the ambulance. The driver of the orange truck emerged, a man in his fifties who Martha could only guess was some sort of laborer. He raised his nose in the air and took a long pull of it into his lungs. Within seconds the man had brought his glare toward the ambulance in the rear, the one that Jack and Scott had placed the decoy watch in. "Looks like they are on to us?" Martha spoke out loud, knowing that John had no idea what was going on, but the man had not asked either, he simply allowed them to load him into the ambulance with little more than a petulant glare.

"Is it Jack?" John finally asked from what seemed to be a great distance, and Martha wondered if the human was mentally shattering like the cup he sent to the floor in his hospital room.

"No, that's not Jack following us, Jack is in front. " She spoke to him, in a tone that mimicked a tired mother explaining sun shine to a child.

"Don't talk to me like I am fragile, Martha. " he spat, but looked in his own rear mirror trying to get a glimpse of the man in coveralls who had now crawled back into his orange truck. "What makes you think that man is following us?" he asked with a steady gaze fixed upon the rear window.

"He is looking for you, for you and Addy." Martha assured him, pulling into evening traffic. The streets were empty now of the work crowds, filled instead with football mavens searching for their favorite pub in search of a place to enjoy the evening match.

The orange truck slid into traffic behind Jack, the driver's nose elevated ever so slightly as he followed behind Jack into the opposite direction of London.

Martha blew a sigh of relief as she continued onto the highway heading south, and held herself from waving to Jack and Scott as they passed.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

The lights of London dazzled as Martha drove through the predawn streets exhausted and feeling as if she had not slept inyears. He slept with his head against the passenger window. Her story had left him nothing but tired, and John still held the watch in his long fingered hands as he slept fitfully in the car seat. Martha had not seen the orange truck, and for that she was more than grateful. But, Jack had not called at all, and she was left worried about what they had encountered

Jack's alluding to the truth about the Mayflies finding them had worried her, it was worse than a mole in Torchwood. If in fact there was another time lord around, then that left only one possibility.

"You are in love with him." John spoke from across a distance. She hadn't expected to hear from him until Sarah Jane's, but he seemed to have alight on another fact he needed clarification on. "All that time, you wouldn't touch me, it wss him you wanted."

"John," she warned with a shake of her head.

"No, no." he spoke calmly, and for the first time since she had dragged him out of the hospital, Martha could see he was starting to come around, to be himself again. "No. It's been him the whole time. I knew, I guess, I knew it was something. I just didn;t think it was so..."

"Convoluted." she nodded. "Its much more than that, John."

"So, do you love him?" he asked again, begged really.

Martha looked at him and nodded. "Yes," she was reminded of a speech she gave the same man a confession of love that was not returned. This time, it was returned, but she was the one doing the hurting. John Bowman loved his wife, even after the separation, the living apart and the lack of a sex life. He loved her, that had bled through from the Doctor. "I love him."

"And I am not him," he said with a ragged breath. "And he is me, and all I have to do is open this bloody watch and you will love me."

"I do love you, John." she said his name like a remembrance of a sweet long melted in the mouth. He was him, but he was not, and no about of sugar coating could change that gleam in his eye that was not there when she looked at him.

"But its not the same." he sighed, "The heart wants what the heart wants." He looked out of the window as she eased onto the quiet road that lead to Sarah Jane's house. "It's not the same."

Martha parked two blocks away from the house and slid out of the driver's seat. She made her way to the incubator where Adric still slept. "Is he all right?" John asked/

"He is awake, moving around a bit." she tapped the plastic side of the box, the baby moved to all fours and brought his hands to the sides. "Can't take him out." she offered, loosening the straps that held the box in place.

"Why ever not? John asked, irritation in his tone. "Its cruel to leave him in there."

Martha shook her head. "Crueler to let those things know exactly where we are. They will take him, and you and devour you whole."

John ambled out of the seat and moved to offer her one good arm. "Can you walk?" she asked pushing the inubator in front of her. It was too early in the morning to cause to much attention, but Martha still covered the plastic box with a couple of hospital blankets.

He pointed to his casted arm and nodded. "Arm broken, legs still good." He looked around. "We going to Sarah's?" John's face fell in an instant at the look in Martha's face. "She's not really my sister, is she?" He still wore the robe he had been wearing when she found him in his hospital room. The edges of the long blue garment flapped against the late spring chill.

She shook her head as they moved through the cool pre dawn street. "She is very close to you though."

"I see," he said, and Martha caught the ote of disbelief in his voice. "SO, basically, what you are telling me is that my whole life is a lie."

"Only the last six months or so." she answered.

"Well, that makes it all better then." He ran his good hand through his hair. "I hope Sarah Jane has NHS on speed dial. I have gone along with all of this in the hopes...I thought maybe you were a little crazy after seeing Addy in that state, then my finding out that..."

Martha nodded, trying to keep his mind from the anger that he had exploded into earlier. "I know its all hard to believe. Sometimes I barely believe it myself. But its true." She looked at John to see him fingering the watch in his hand again. He had brought it out of the pocket of his robe and walked at an odd cadence as he twirled it in his long fingers.

A small face peeked from the curtain of Sarah Jane's house, a moment later, her small frame emerged from the door on the side, she too in a robe and looking more than a little put out.

She wordlessly ushered them in to the house through the same door he had exited, Sarah helped move the incubator into the living room. Adric was becoming more and more fretful housed in his cage. "We need to get him upstairs, he's gt to be tired of being in that thing." Sarah announced. Luke had come into the room in his pajamas, rubbing his eyes sleepily. The three of them got the infant upstairs with John at their heels. Martha knew he was as anxious to get the baby out as much as she was, but he seemed more than a little bothered at the casual attitude regarding the strange that the entire house seemed to live in.

"Why are we taking him upstairs?" h asked halfway to the attic.

It was Sarah who answered. She spoke only after an abiding nod from Martha, an understanding transpired breifly between the two women. "John," she nodded. "I know you feel as if you have been lied to, but this is all necessary for your and Addy 's safety."

"It's safe to keep my son locked up in a cage?" he asked bitterly.

"For now," Sarah nodded, speaking in that even tone that Martha had always appreciated. "We are taking him upstairs, to the TARDIS. Its safer in there and whatever is chasing you won't be able to detect his...uniquness."

They made it to the landing of the attic, the large computer bid them good morning. John looked around as if he had just fallen down a rabbit hole. "I'm glad you guys made it here, " Sarah Jane began, "when Jack called, he told me what had happened, but he didn't warn me I would have a guest."

"He didn't tell you we were coming?" Martha asked, moving toward the familiar blue box in the far corner of the large room.

"Oh, he told us you were coming." Luke finally spoke. As he movd to the side of the TARDIS, the door flung open nd a familiar blonde head popped out with a smile. "He didn't tell us she was coming." he finished.


	19. And You Get Rid Of Me

**Thanks for the love on this one, its starting to pick up momentum, sort of. So many of you knew, and yet so many of you thought it was someone else. Good call those that knew.**

Her long slender hand reached across the span of distance between the door of the ancient ship and the small gathering of people outside of it.

The man with the sad affectation held his bandaged arm and took a large step backward. "No," he insisted with a wild shake of his head. "Oh, god, this is cruel, too cruel. " He looked toward the woman he thought was his wife as if this had all been her fault, as if she had concocted this entire scene. "Why, why would you do this?"

Martha only heard his words from across some great chasm of reality. She stared unabashedly at the young woman still dangling out of the doors of the TARDIS. "I don;t understand." Martha insisted, hands clutched the sides of the incubator as if in defense of the child within it.

Jenny let out a large, long huff, reminiscient of sounds that the Doctor himself had made at in the face of human stupidity. "Right, we can stand here gob smacked and slack jawed wile those bugs come crawling over us, or we can all get into the nice time machine and take care of the situation." She had said it as if there was a choice, but even as she spoke, she had taken control of the situation. Jenny grabbed the incubator and dragged it into the confines of the ship.

Sarah Jane watched the scene with a detached air. "I think Jenny is right." she added, placig a hand on her old friend.

John flinched from the contact and fired an accusatory glare at the woman. "You in on this?" he nearly bellowed. "Tell me what the hell is going on here, and why is my dead daughter wheeling my not son into a giant blue box?"

Martha shool her head and wanted to scream. The old ship had made paper mache of experiences that the Doctor had had; she could not be mad, it was the old girl's oly way to patch the holes a life of a human would have. Martha watched her son being taken into the ship and had instinctively followed, then halted when she saw John's countenance. "Doctor...she tried with a glimmer of hope.

The man with the broken arm flinched again at Martha's voice, he turned from her and looked inside of the ship, angling his head to get a better look at the inside where Jenny stood next to the incubator with an instrument, working to get it open. "I can't believe you locked him up in this." Jenny shook her head.

Martha sighed, family reunions seemed to always have a note of tension to them, but this was ridiculous. "John, please. We need to get into the-"

"My dead daughter is standing in a box that is not a box, " he charted in a small voice. " saw her die three years ago. She was shot on the street..." he shook his head. "No, this is all balls up impossible." He turned and moved to the door of the attic on the far end of the room, stopping for a moment at the large computer and shaking his head as if stunned by the impossibility of the entire situation was summed up in the housing of the large living computer. "You're all insane."

Martha and Sarah Jane exchanged a silent game of 'rock, paper, scissors,' ending with Sarah Jane chasing after the Doctor, and Martha entering the TARDIS.

Jenny flashed a look of at Martha that the older woman could only classify as annoyance mixed with irritation. "How the hell could you let him do that to himself?" she asked after Martha had closed the door to the ship. Martha watched the young woman pull her son out of the incubator and hold him close. "he is beautiful." she sighed to the boy.

"Martha was not sure what comment to address first, instead she chose a different line of questioning. "I realize that there is a horde of creatures bearing down upon your kind, your father is not himself, and you have recently returned from the dead. However, I must ask a few questions."

That look again, and a low strangled noise from the younger woman, that Martha could only guess was more irritation. "I survived, came here, and now I am going to get you all out of this you have managed to dig us into."

Martha had hopes of Jenny's use of _you_ was the plural, even the King's, anything but the dismal accusatory sneer that she heard in her voice. Great, Martha thought with a sigh, another blond that hates me. "Ok, questions later. I need your help to get him to open that damn watch."

Jenny shrugged as she snuggled Adric closer. "He'll open it, he's got no choice, its what we are." Jenny juggled the baby between arms, "The bugs are gonna get here soon, we need to leave."

She could see the soldier in the girl's eyes. The door opened behind the and Sarah Jane entered into the TARDIS. "How is he?" Martha asked.

"He is not well. The strain of all of this, and having just come out of surgery when you...convinced him to come." Sarah nodded to Martha knowingly. "He's in the spare room downstairs, resting."

"No time for rest, " Jenny clipped, "We need to get on the road."

Martha raised a hand and spoke. "I'll go, if anything he could not be out there with the watch in case he opens it.." Martha looked as if she considered taking Adric with her, Jenny made no move to hand him over, and Martha strolled out of the door s of the ship.

Martha found him standing outside of the TARDIS. His good hand stroked the side of the machine in a way that must have been reminiscent of his true self. His eyes met hers as she stepped into the attic and Martha was struck by the absolute sadness in his eyes. "This…" he started from a choked voice. That's Jenny in there." John shook his head. "But, I saw her die, watched her fall, she passed away in my arms. How is this possible? How is she here? How is she alive? I remember her death."

"Do you recall her funeral?" Martha asked, pained at what she must do.

\He stared at nothing for a time, head bowed, eyes as lost as she had ever seen them. "No, I don't I –maybe its from the illness."

Martha folded her arms and leaned against the side of the ship, as close to the man as she dared to get. "An illness that you informed me," she looked at her watch dramatically. "Twenty five hours ago was nonexistent." She shrugged at the end of her statement, eyes never leaving the sad brown ones next to her.

He shook his head, another sad look slid across his fine features. "I don't know…" But, his unbandaged hand reached into the side of the robe he still wore and pulled out the watch.

She watched his hands turn the watch over and over in his hands. He seemed stuck, as if given the choice; he would stand there with that watch in his hands for all of eternity. Cautiously, but with the gentlest voice she could muster, she asked him another question. "Do you remember her birth? Her mother? Where did she grow up?"

The fist hit the blue door with such a force that Martha wanted to check his hand for damage. "My life is a lie," he sobbed quickly getting hold of his emotions again before going on. "My life is a lie, and you have lied to me for months."

"You asked me to." She shrugged again and shook her head. "And I had to, I had to hide you and Adric. It was my job" Martha shook her head and rubbed her eyes. "No, it is my job to keep you safe. You and Adric," she left the rest of the sentence to hang in the air, a knowledge of something she did not need to speak. "Given the chance, I would lie again and again if that is what's needed."

He nodded as if it was the explanation of all. "I open this, and I become him." He spoke a truth as a statement, yet searched for an answer in her eyes.

Martha nodded, firing the answer to him wordlessly with a hooded look, she watched as he sighed and spoke again. "I don't want to be him. I want to go home, to my books and my piano." He took Martha's hand into his good one and tugged. "C'mon, let's go get Addy, let's go home." He plead. "Please we can start over, all new lives, me and you. And Addy."

"You know I want to,"She admitted with a nod and holding in the sb that wanted to erupt. "You know I would."

He nodded with another firm tug on her arm. "Then let's we can buy a house somewhere near your family, who needs Manchester anyway?" Another tug on her hand, and his head came to rest on her forehead. "I love you."

She could say it, there was not a whisper of hesitation when she looked into his y=eyes and repeated the words to him. It was easy as breathing. He was who she loved, a slight of hand away from the man she truly loved.

He leaned into her then, his lips came to hers and she tasted that old scent, felt the odd sensation of safety and fire in his touch. She accepted his touch, and return it as sincerely. "Will you kiss me like that, after?" he asked with his lips only moments away from hers. "Will you always kiss me like that?"

Martha gave an imperceptible nod, and John kissed her again for the last ime as a human man. "I don't want to be him." he answered softly.

"I love him," Martha admitted to both of them. "And he is you and you are him. The man I love does not want to be the rage that he has to be, but he is. He wants to go home to small life, but he can't and I accept that. I accept you, both of you."

"We can't go home to that small little life, can we?"

Martha fought against her first instincts and pulled him into a hug. He resisted for a moment, a time that seemed to stretch into an eternity. He relented, ceasing the tugging of her hand, and allowed Martha to hold him, his head resting on her shoulder. "You know that we can't" she spoke softly into his ear. "Deep down, John…Doctor. You know, you know you have to open that watch. The universe needs you, and right now, the Earth needs you."

"And you?" he asked quietly, not looking into her eyes. "Do you need me?"

"Always, Doctor. I always have, and I imagine I always will." It was an end as much as a beginning for John, she felt his body shudder silently against her frame as he let go of hat he thought had been real, and worked for the strength to embrace a life he knew nothing

They stayed that way long enough for Sarah Jane to pop her head out of the TARDIS, only to duck back in at the scene in front of her. Martha silently thanked the tact of the older woman and allowed John the human to grieve.

He followed behind her into the ship, her hand tugging his now. He seemed unfazed by any of his surroundings, and for an instant, Martha understood the Doctor's love newcomers amazement at the ship. It was pride. His gaze was fixed upon the tiny woman holding Adric. Martha thought the young girl would have tired of the baby by now, but Jenny was as steadfast as a centurion of Rome. She smiled at John and moved to stand next to him. John took a hesitant step backwards and Martha worried he would dart back out of the TARDIS, she realized he was a hare's breadth away from losing his sanity as it is, he just was not ready to confront a not dead daughter holding his not son.

Martha let go of his hand and John finally did take a tourists spin around the console room. He moved toward the time rotor as if a man in a dream. His free hand touched, tentatively at first the various switches and dials. Jenny made to speak, but both Sarah Jane and Martha silenced her with a quick wave of their hands. Martha did not want to disturb his reverie. She knew he was feeling something that would lead to the ultimate goal. Holding him outside of the TARDIS, she knew it was a sort of goodbye for him; he was closing a life of sanity and normalcy and speeding toward the unknown.

He lifted his head and watched the rotor move steadily and evenly. The women in the room held their breath as he stared mesmerized by the motion of the heart of the ancient ship. It was a sudden call from Addy that snapped him back into reality. The infant, upon finally seeing his father, held out his arms and made a grunt of desire. John moved swiftly to the small child, he took him from Jenny and held him in his arms.

The silence in the room soon filled with the small conversation of father and son. He needed to say good bye to the old Addy, but that child was long gone. The quiet nature of the boy made the man who held him ask to no one. "Is he an alien as well?" he asked.

It was Jenny who answered; she had been itching to say something to him since she was silenced earlier. "He is, and so am i." she nodded as if this would hold as explanation enough.

But, John the human turned to his wife with the questions. "So, I am an alien, Jenny is an alien, and " he held the baby in his arms closer to his chest, Addy did not seem to mind, he lay his head on his father's chest and let his thumb drift toward his mouth. John patted the baby's back gently as he spoke. "And, he is not my son." He asked Martha.

"I told you he is, John." Martha spoke slowly. "And I told you how that happened." Jenny flashed a look at Martha as she spoke; a look that told made Martha realize that Jenny did not have all the details on that one. Perhaps a free exchange of information later over coffee and judgments?

John nodded and brought Adric to rest in Martha's arms. He reached into the pocket of his robe and again brought out the watch. He stared at it and sighed. Without any great fanfare, or hesitation, John Bowman opened the watch and was no more.

Jenny leapt over the jump seat to help as her father crumpled onto the metal grating. Martha gently shoved the young woman out of the way after placing Adric in Sarah Jane's arms. "Budge up, let me see him." She offered as kindly as possible to the younger woman.

"He's not even your species." Jenny accused, but moved aside reluctantly. She paid Martha for her diligence to the Doctor with a sour glare and a petulant folding of arms.

Martha ignored the young woman's antics, recalling her own visage in the face of her father's affair with Anaalise. Even though there was no mother to remain loyal to, there was still the idea of fathers and daughters that was near sacred in its devotion. Instead, she helped the Doctor to a sitting position and tried to maintain his dignity around the flimsy hospital robe. He smiled at Martha sadly, embarrassed at him momentary lapse of strength. In seconds, he was on his feet; the golden light that had poured forth from the watch had dissipated into fragile memory.

"Blimey, that's got quite the kick to it." He smiled at Martha with a quick squeeze of her hand. "I think next time I am going to have to put that in a—"

Martha shook her head and smiled at him. "Next time, you find another nanny to run behind you." She asserted.

"Awwww, c'mon Martha. No one takes care of me like you." He drawled, the smile that was tugging at her own lips was reflected in his face.

"I've done it enough." She fired back, the smile spreading across her lips. He had an effect on her that she could no longer deny. "What is this, the fourth time? Fifth time?"

"No one else chases behind me like you." He answered.

"I can." Jenny spoke up. As if suddenly aware of her presence, The Doctor grabbed her by the shoulders and hugged her without warning.. The young girl gave herself over to the contact, she seemed to melt into the arms of the older Time Lord, and he held her as if she would fly away as soon as they lost contact.

Jenny," he finally uttered in a voice strangled by emotion. "Oh, I don't know…"The Doctor looked into the eyes of his daughter for a long moment.

"Doctor," Sarah Jane spoke from the other side of the console. "There is n orange truck outside of the house."

"Orange truck, orange truck." he seemed confused for a minute, but Martha knew he was back in the game, "Ah, that's right, orange truck. " He looked at Martha and grinned. "I thought we had already taken care of this problem." he grinned.

"Oh, you know, same old life." she shrugged nonchalantly.

"Same old life, same old me." he rifled through his pockets as if in search of something, Martha stood next to him holding the sonic screwdriver she had been hiding in her pocket since the hospital.

"Looking for this?" Martha asked.

He took the item from her hand, his fingers dancing across her hand momentarily. "Always can count on you, Martha Jones." He offered her his free arm and grinned. "Want to go handle some pest control Dr. Bowman?" his eyebrow quirked in querry.

Martha slid her arm through his and smiled. "Absolutely Mr. Bowman."


	20. There's Nothing You Must Be

He tucked her hand under his arm and lead her out of the attic, stopping long enough to fire a jaunty wave at the large computer in the room. Martha was struck by how happy and bubbly he seemed, more so than usual. He was in in far too good a mood for a man facing having to make an entire species extinct. Again.

"You're in an awfully good mood this morning." She huffed as they made it down the stairs

"Course I am, why I shouldn't be?" he asked with a twirl off of the bannister, landing on his feet at the bottom of the stairs. He was still dressed in the hospital robe, and it flew out behind him as he made his way to the large picture window on the far end of the room. "Only one?" he asked with an incredibility that made Martha smile. Only the Doctor would be disheartened at a lighter load to fight. "I must be losing my popularity."

"Let's count that to the blessings, shall we?" she asked, meeting him at the window and peering out from around the curtain. "I thought there were more, I never would have woke you up[ for only one—"

His hand fell upon her arm and he shook his head. "It was time for me to get up, anyway." He asserted with a sigh he went on. "And, Addy was bad off, had he died…" The Doctor let the question hang in the air, and Martha too was unwilling to go along the line of thought any further. In the six months of his existence, the small humanoid creature had become the most important being in the universe, for both of them.

They stood close at the window, "Before we go out, and the crazy starts." he began slowly turning to face her.

"Yes?" she asked, but he was on her so fast she could hardly breathe. The Doctor took her face in his hands and drew her as close to him as he could. He kissed her then, the fire turned on her. She felt monuments rise and fall in the seconds of contact, the feeling of safety and satiety began to build until she thought she really would collapse from lack of oxygen.

He moved his hands to her waist and pulled away from her, rested his head on hes. "I have missed you." he blew softly.

"You once told me never waste time on a hug." she answered purposefully.

"I never said anything about wasting time on a good snog, did I?" he grinned and kissed her forehead. "I just want you to know, you did everything right. Don't think for a moment anything that happened over that time, its all as it should be."

She pulled away then, feeling the guilt become a palpable thing. This was not the time for the discussion they needed to have. Martha squared her shoulder and hardened her glare, "So, plan." She nodded toward the truck still idling in front of Sarah Jane's home.

The Doctor shrugged and took another long look out of the window. "Any word from Jack?" he asked.

Martha dug her phone from her pocket and flicked through the items. Nothing. She shook her head and made to place it back in her pocket, when the Doctor held his hand out in silent request.

He waved his sonic over the phone and dialed the number. "Jack? Jack, what are you speaking in low tones? Oh, I see, well yes that would make one speak in low tones. Oh, right yes, its me, oh fine,. Fine fine. " He was quiet for a time, and a grim look settled onto his angular features. "Now you listen to me, under no circumstances. I repeat, under no circumstances are you to come within breathing distance of my daughter, do you get that?

Martha turned her head to hide the knowing grin she felt creeping across her face. Universal invarients being what they are, any father would want to keep a young girl away from Jack Harkness.

"Right, well," he sighed then and rubbed his hand over his eyes "I suppose it's the only thing we can do. You keep them there, well for as long as you can. I know that, Jack. I'll be there as soon as I can." A pause. "That means as soon as I can. Listen, it was your people who screwed this up in the first place, now I have to ride in on a blue box and tidy up"

Martha wisely kept her mouth shut, what she could glean from the stilted conversation outside of the hospital, there was more the fault of Jenny in this one, but then again, how could she have known the mayflies were out there?

The Doctor had hung up the phone and for a moment, Martha feared for the devices continued safety. He was angry, angrier than she had seen him in a long time. The cool silence and fire in his eyes spoke more than the screaming that most people did. The Doctor did not raise his voice, unless it was to tell a companion to run. She wanted to know what Jack said over the phone to make the Doctor seethe,. But herself did not want to ask.

"Well," he started again in that bright wait, the storm clouds having passed over for another day. "Best to get this on with. Seems as if we have more waiting for us in Manchester."

"Oh, no." she answered with earnest sadness. Martha did not need to ask if there were casualties. If the flies were there, then there were humans turned out of their own flesh.

The Doctor must have read something in her voice, he spoke without turning ar5ound. "This has nothing to do with the watches, Martha. In fact, it's a good thing you opened them when you did."

"I dropped the first one," Martha admitted. "It opened on its own. How, how did they get the scent then? We were so careful." But, she knew the answer after the words left her lips./

"Right, sure you can figure that one out." He blew. Without warning, the Doctor stepped outside wielding the sonic as if it were a weapon. She ran out behind him as fast as her legs would carry, which never seemed to be fast enough when it came to the Doctor.

"Well, look at this." He spoke loudly, rapping his hand on the side of the window. "Parks and recs, eh? Blimey you little green bugs get around. Although, I have to say I love the irony of one of them driving around in the body of a Recs guy who hates bugs.

Martha tried to find the humor in too, but all she could think about was some family somewhere in Britain was going to set a place at the table for dinner for a husband or father who was never coming to dinner again. The thought made her sadder than any emergency death she had ever encountered in the A and E. Sadder still that she somehow had a hand in it, even if the Doctor insisted she did nothing wrong. There were deaths in England, deaths that occurred because they were looking for her son. Empty, meaningless, deaths that hurt Martha's soul every time she looked at the thing sitting inside the truck.

The man who had followed them all the way from Manchester exited the truck more calmly than Martha would have expected. The Doctor's face wore a stone mask of irritation and disgust as the thing that was once someone's beloved something stood to its full 6 foot 5 inch height. It held its hands up in the air in a mock surrender that surprised both the human and the Time Lord at her side. "I'm not here to suck out your essence, Doctor." The thing spoke with the all too human voice, reminding Martha again of the life now lost. "I'm here to help."

"Help?" he asked with a bewildered glance thrown to the woman next to him. "How ?"

"I don't see how you can help?" Martha interjected on the heels of the Doctor's question, before the thing wearing a human suit could offer any answers. "I don't see how its helping you came and killed a man already; you are walking around in a body that does not belong to you…"

"Martha," he warned, trying to pull her back from the brink of anger.

She shook her head and went on. "…breathing air on my planet through the nose of someone you have already killed. I ask you, how is that helping?"

"Good question" the Doctor asked finally with a steady nod.

The man blinked a few times before answering. "I can help in this. There are weaknesses that my people have weaknesses that have nothing to do with the bodies they may inhabit."

The Doctor gave her a tired smile and nodded. He looked back at the thing in front of them and spoke. "Let's see how he offers to help, Martha. " he soothed not taking his eyes off of the creature in front of them. She nodded and he finally did turn back to the thing. "All right, without a long winded reason or an info dump of astronomical proportions, I need to know how you can help us get rid of the problem."

The creature slid his hand into his pocket and produced what must have once been a spray bottle. The top of it was black and lights ran along the sides in an impressive display of technology.

"Insecticide?" The Doctor asked, one eyebrow quirked. "Really?"

The big man in coveralls shook his shaggy head. "Not insecticide, it forces them to leave their bodies they have stolen." He handed the bottle to the Doctor, who examined the housing on top and stuck his eye into the nozzle.

"They die?" Martha asked still not sure of the benevolence of the creature in front of her. Each time she had encountered these things; there were deaths, useless deaths. She could see how the Doctor grew weary of it all the time and she was tired of coming into the cross hairs of the pests. The weariness she felt, she could now see in the Doctor's eyes. He bore the same manic cadence as he always had, the same tireless sparkle behind his bro0wn eyes, but, like Dorothy trying to get home, she could see the wizard behind the green curtain truly was just a weary old man with no way home.

The creature nodded his head. "There was no cause for this to happen. We...have no right to take what is not ours. ." He spoke haltingly, and Martha wondered if it was sadness she caught behind his eyes. "To eradicate an entire species…it's wrong."

The Doctor nodded solemnly, as if the wind had been taken out of his sails, and Martha knew he had planned on saying the exact things before the creature beat him to it. "Right," he began. "Looks like the next stop on the TARDIS Express is Manchester."

"How do we know that's what it does?" Martha asked when the Doctor had turned on his heels as if to lead them on a long journey. "I mean, how do we know that stuff is what he says it is?"

"Because we have no choice, Martha." he said in that fiery way that always made her blood run cold. "Because, right now, there are a hundred of those things overrunning that hospital in Manchester. They have launched an invasion, Martha, and right now, we have no choice. The Doctor considered her face for a moment, then turned and looked at the man in the CarHart coveralls. He sighed tiredly. "We'll check it out when we get back to the TARDIS. I suppose you need to come too, then. I will have to check the concoction against your DNA."

She grabbed his arm and spun him closer to her. "My son is in there, our son. And your daughter." she looked over to the man still standing close enough to hear their conversation.

"If he wanted to kill us, we would be dead b now." the Doctor wisely added.

The tall man nodded. "You are a fable, " he nodded toward the couple. "The two of you, generations have rose and fell hearing about the beings that brought us to B'sil'ka'tya."

The two frowned at each other, the Doctor's face then washed with realization. "Generations?" he asked in a still voice. "Oh, that's dangerous."

The tall man nodded, but Martha gaped with the horror of the realization. "They think we're gods?"

"Welcome to my world." the Doctor said with an offhanded air.

"Some think you are the Devil." the man added.

Martha nodded and the Doctor felt the need to explain out loud what she already understood. "Balance in all things. Angles, Devils. " He scratched the back of his neck. "Met the Devil once, welllllll he thought he was the Devil, I think he was just a very angry and old creature."

"But why come after us, then? I mean if we are some sort of celestial beings to your people, why chase after us?"

The Doctor placed his hands upon her shoulders, a move to try and calm hthe tremor audible in her voice. "Martha, think about it. You must understand the basic need of those to understand the divine. Your own people have tried to tap into the god part of the brain. It's not just human nature...its nature."

"But, we're just human" She stopped at the Doctor's smirk, "well, you know what I mean. We're not anything. I mean, I am sure its been a long time for your people, but we had hoped that evolution and time would put a distance between their perception of life spans."

"It did, it has. But," the man spoke. "Like any good myth or legend, the tale got taller on down the line."

"But, that is ridiculous, my son, he is just a baby."

"Who has already lived a longer existence than the oldest of my people."

Martha nodded and the Doctor went on, "My own people thought themselves gods, and even we had our own notion of our own gods."

The man nodded and fell in line behind the Doctor, but Martha stood her ground and folded her arms. "SO, we are just gonna let him into the TARDIS then?" she asked in a tone that was akin to a wife speaking to a husband newly returned from the pub at 4 in the morning. "The one thing I kept them from the whole miserable time I have been stuck here, hiding, and you want to just give it to them?"

The Doctor turned, hands shoved into his pockets. He seemed to consider her words carefully, and his own before he spoke

They did not speak much on the way back to the attic. The curious thing in carharts slumped ahead of them, and Martha brought up the rear, still seething at the Doctor's apparent idiocy. He did not seem to understand that this thing was still one of them. He spent most of the time dealing with them; he was always asleep through it. They had nearly killed her, made her nearly kill herself, put her son's life in jeopardy, and killed countless rolls of people on various planets. If they were not a more cogent argument for species extinction that Martha could list.

Sarah Jane grasped Luke's arm when the tall man stepped into the TARDIS, Luke, bless, had stepped in front of both his mother and Jenny who was still holding Adric. "All right, " Jenny answered, unfazed by the man once the Doctor came in behind him.

"Doctor," Sarah Jane spoke with a sour look through gritted teeth. "Please tell me that is not one of those things."

"That's not one of those things. " Martha flashed him a look of disapproval that made him throw his hands in the air. "Well, she told me to say it, she didn't tell me not to lie." He said to her as he threw his coat over the coral strut and adjusted his tie.

"There are children here. " Sarah added, pulling Luke toward the still open TARDIS doors. She gave the mad man she once called friend another cold look. "We're going to wait out here, Doctor."

He nodded and sighed. "Maybe you should take Adric with you? Just for a bit?"

Martha gave him another treacherous glance, but nodded as Jenny handed over the baby to her. She kissed his forehead, and the Doctor mimicked the tender adorations upon the baby's brow. They probably stood with the baby between them, longer than was comfortable for the other occupant of the room. The blond made a loud throat clearing sound They ignored the first three, but Martha was the first to raise her head from the moment and smile at Jenny.

The Doctor soon followed, he took the baby from Martha and placed the child into the waiting arms of his friend. "We seem to leave him with friends quite a bit." Martha choked after the doors closed and the Doctor had joine3d Jenny at the console.

"Martha," he warned with a shake of his head. "Don't."

She shook her head with fierce determination. "Not," she answered with a defiance that surprised even her. She noted Jenny's glare and raised chin and felt her own chin rise.

"Right," the Doctor nodded at Martha, then turned to his daughter. "So, why is the stiff with the bug brain in our ship?" she asked in that rapid firer speech pattern that Martha was beginning to associate with Time Lords."

"Yes," the Doctor grinned, he turned to the man who had stood stock still for the last ten minutes. "This big fella here has offered to help us with our bug problem." He turned to Jenny and showed her the bottle.

"Bug spray?" Jenny asked with a scrunch of her nose that reminded Martha of every teenager she has had to tell to do something. "You are telling me we are going to walk into a nest of these things with bug spray?"

"How do you know there's a nest?" Martha asked.

Jenny shrugged and folded her arms. "I've been here a while, I pick up quick."

"Which is how they got the scent." The Doctor said, looking at Martha. She nodded and wanted to feel better, but had a hard time not feeling worse.

"That's not fair!" Jenny cried.

Martha and the Doctor shared a look then, and the old alien sighed. "Jenny, there was no way to know that anyone was looking for us." He soothed. "It wasn't an accusation."

"Sounded like one to me." She huffed. "Sounds like you trying to say this is all my fault."

"I never said that!" The Doctor fired too quickly. He ran his hand over his face with a quick glance at Martha, who, in turn shook her head and held her hands out in front of her. She had dealt with enough teenagers to know a volatile situation, and Martha decided she was not going to be able to defuse any bombs until she got to know the young woman better.

"You said to Martha that I was the reason the flies came here." She went on with all the petulance of a teen denied a trip to the mall and the use of the credit card. "I didn't know anyone was looking for you, how was I supposed to know that? I was looking for you after you left me for dead on that planet."

The console room was silent, the Doctor seemed unsure of both what to say, and where to put his hands. Martha thought the whole thing would have been funny if the young woman's timing had not been so shitty. She considered breaking the silence of the room, reminding them of the short time they had to try to save the people that had been overtaken by the flies. She had thought about it for so long, that it was finally the man in the corner who spoke. "We need to get to—"

"Time machine!" Both Jenny and the Doctor answer in unison. The man took a defensive step back, and Martha almost felt bad for him. The two Time Lords faced off, Jenny was every bit the teenager she resembled, and the Doctor looked as if he had been thrust into the very pits of Hell without his flame retardant briefs.

"Look," Martha began with a tentative step toward the two angry aliens, both with folded arms and matching looks of disdain. "I know we can travel back and forth in time and the idea of a sense of urgency really isn't your thing. At least, not at the current moment." She chanced a look between the two; they both looked as if it was a matter of moments before something blew up. Funny, Martha sighed to herself, I had imagined hugging. "We really need to get this show on the road." She spoke slowly and as emotionless as she could muster. Martha had no worries about the Doctor, but an already irate teen could ensure a situation escalating to DEFCON 1 with little to no warning.

The Doctor nodded and flipped a switch under his fingers without losing direct eye contact with his daughter. The ship set into a delicate bump and Martha could feel the spin that told her they were in the vortex. "Agreed," he blew.

Martha watched as the two of them turned simultaneously to the buttons on the console. They moved in perfect synch setting the dials and switches, and soon they landed with the usual jarring motion that spoke of the ship's displeasure at the behavior of her occupants and she wondered if the Doctor had noticed.

Jenny grabbed for a weapon, one she must have come on board with from Sarah Jane's. "No guns!" the Doctor bellowed as he rushed to take the offending article from the young woman.

"Why? Its mine."

"I hate guns, guns aren't necessary." The Doctor said, his hands on the item that Jenny still held in her grasp.

"You hate guns, " she answered, raising the weapon to her eye and checking the ammo. "I, on the other hand, have no problem with them."

"Those are people out there, Jenny. Humans who have had no choice in becoming what they are, if you shoot one, then there isn't a chance of them recovering." He answered, the steel in his voice was as hard as cobalt. "You'll have killed them, and there is no amount of time travel that will fix that, they don't regenerate like you and I."

IT was another ten seconds of that odd standoff they had had earlier, and Martha wondered which one would flinch. The blond girl fired a look at Martha that she would have sworn was contempt, in that lok she knew what the young girl was thinking about the fragility of the human species. Jenny placed the weapon on grated floor and huffed loudly. "Fine, but if anything happens-"

"Yes, yes, I know, my fault." he smiled the and headed for the doors.

They filed out in silent single file, with the large man in front of them. They had landed in the back alley of some location that Martha barely recognized as Manchester. "How did you know we were in Manchester?" The Doctor asked.

"Because, she was there, well near there, working for Torchwood Four." Jack answered as he stepped from the shadows,


	21. Speak Plainly To Me

The immortal man stepped from out of the shadows of the building. They had landed behind a large building that only then Martha recognized as the back of a hospital.

"She's been here a while, you know." Jack continued with a raise of his chin at the young woman.

The Doctor didn't shift his gaze; he fixed the new comer with the same intense glare as when he first appeared. "We already know all of this, Jack, tell us some things we don;t know.:

Jack, noticing the discomfort of the clutch of people shifted his own perspective to the important. "They're in there." he nodded toward the large building.

The Doctor nodded and moved toward the door that Jack had emerged from. Jack placed his hand on the Doctor's shoulder and received an angry glare in response. "It's not good in there, Doc. " Jack spoke quietly.

The Doctor said nothing he turned more determinedly toward the small metal door and swung it open angrily. "It's always bad in there for me, Jack."

The group followed into the building, into what Martha could only surmise as the kitchens. Every hospital had a food system, feeding hundreds a day in various stages of care. The smell of institution food assaulted her nostrils as she made her way inside. Bt, it wasn't the smell that got to her. They had arrived there at the early morning, at a time when the entire area should have been ablaze with activity preparing trays for the noon crowd.

What assaulted =them was a silence, a dead silence that made them all uncomfortable. The Doctor thrust his hands deep into his pockets and gave a cursory glance around the large utilitarian room. "Well, guess this is the place," he said with no mirth.

Martha could hear it in his voice, she knew him well enough to know the discord in his demeanor. He was going to fry whatever he could find to hold responsible, they had their chance, he had even given them a second chance, something she knew he never did. Chances were over, and she feared the rage bubbling to the surface in the ancient man.

"This way," Jack broke the eerie silence and took lead toward the stairs. The small hospital was only for the immediate area, it had been more of a way station between intermediate care and urgent care. The hospital only had three floors, and Martha noted that Jack was making his way to the third floor. She nearly faltered her easy cadence as the signs pointed toward Maternity.

He motioned the four into a closet off the nursery. "It's worse than I told you." he whispered in the tight quarters.

The man in the orange coveralls finally spoke. "It was the plan all along." he assured them.

"They wanted as long a life as they could get, a way to stay alive."

"Just like on Zybthara." Martha said. "They are relentless."

"A hurricaine could take notes." The Doctor hissed. "I have a plan."

Jack shook his head, "All bets are off on this one, Doc."

The Doctor glared at him again, "what does that mean?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

It was from a perch typically reserved for happier occasions, a smiling family poinin=ting and taking pictures. The four of them peered around the large sheet window at the throng of people inside of the nursery. Women in gowns, men in lab coats, it was the entire maternity ward, all gathered inside of the large theatre. And the newborns.

It was a punch in the gut for Martha, she couldn't watch, but the soldier who had walked the earth could not turn away. The Doctor took a deep breath and angled back along the wall. "Ok," he nodded. "We need a plan."

"I had a plan." Jenny said with a fold of her slender arms. "You made me leave it on the TARDIS."

"Still hate guns, Doc?" Jack asked with an intolerant shake of his head.

The group huddled in the corner of the walkway on the other side of the nursery. "Of course he hates guns." Jenny said, shaking her head and looking up as if for strength.

Jack shook his head and made to give her his spare piece." You need a gun," he asserted, with a nearly apologetic look at the Doctor. "She's really good with them."

He slapped away the proffered weapon before the teen could reach out for it. "Be that as it may," he hissed. "No child of mine needs a gun to survive. Don't you dare give her one." It was venomous enough to be the final word on the subject, but Martha Jones was not privy to his ire, not on this. She reached into her coat and produced the weapon Jack had tossed her the day before. She was thankful she did not have to use it, and even more grateful to fob it off on someone else.

He fixed a glare upon her that would have frozen hell in June, Martha shook her head and hissed back at him. "She needs it, someone needs to guard against them coming back into the nursery once we get them out of there."

"We are gonna need a diversion. " Jack nodded.

"And I am going to need a gun to make that diversion." Jenny amended with a nod. She was the face of the Old West. Marshall Dillon and Miss Kitty rolled into one.

"You can create quite the diversion without using a weapon." The Doctor insisted. With a murderous look aimed at Martha, he swiped for the gun held in the blonde's hand. She angled it away from her grasping father. With a smile of treachery at Martha, she placed the gun in her holster.

"Diversions can be made without a gun," Martha spoke to the Doctor, "But I would feel a hell of a lot better with someone armed guarding my ass while I am in there doing what needs to be done."

He looked at her then, in fact all eyes turned to the dark skinned woman. "Martha," The Doctor insisted icily. "No one is insisting you go on in there and treat all of those infants with that spray."

"No one did," she nodded, "But I am going to be the one to do it, I am the only one with any kind of medical training that can handle the situation."

The Doctor made to raise his hand, but Martha quelched his argument. "Yes, Doctor. You will assist me in there." she hooked a thumb toward the nursery. "But I don;t want Sisko and Poncho in there with their itchy trigger fingers."

"Assist?" The Doctor nodded. "I can do that." he smiled at her then, a smile that brightened the dingy corner the group huddled into. He smiled at her and she felt it hit her like a punch in the heart. It was the look he had given her months before as they stood outside of the TARDIS after he had survived the hell of a unknown assailant on the planet Midnight. Absolute trust is what she saw in his eyes. Absolute trust and amazement and something else.

Love.

"Right," Martha went on, catching herself from falling into his gaze. "You two." she pointed at Jack and Jenny. "Stay outside the doors, be ready for the onslaught."

"No shooting." The Doctor insisted still fixing her with his gaze.

"Doctor, we have to-do what we must. There are infants in there, and while I would love to be able to save every person that has been infested with these things, my first priority is to the innocent. The ones that cannot fight for themselves."

The Doctor flashed a look of understanding. Words were exchanged among the five of them, a plan hatched.

"I can't believe you gave her a gun!" the Doctor railed, hands in the air and lips set on full manic sputter. "And, if I am not mistaken, it's the same gun you held on me!"

"You held a gun on him?" Jenny asked the older woman with what could only be described as wide eyed wonder.

Martha shrugged nonchalantly and fought against the smile tugging at her features. "It was the only way to get him to cooperate."

"Don't I know it." Jack added with a shake of his head.

"She holds a gun on you and I get lectured for just holding a gun?" Jenny flared suddenly.

"Probably not a good time for this." Martha nodded toward the nursery on the other side of the hall. "Unless we plan on this being the diversion."

"Why not," the Doctor fired, "Then my daughter doesn't need a gun." He tried again at the weapon now encased in leather at the hip of the young girl. She ducked behind the immortal man with the American accent and scoffed. "

"We really need to focus here, Doctor." Martha answer with a hand on his arm. The3 Doctor turned his brown eyes on her and nodded.

Jenny taunted the crew inside of the nursery, she ran like a daughter of the Doctor would. Most of them chased her, and while the others that stayed inside to mind the store were then accosted by a smiling gun toting Captain who led the rest out into the hallway.

Silently, but without missing a beat, the Doctor and Martha worked on each individual infant. She wondered if he was planning a way to remove her from the situation, to try and place her into that glass jar.

It was the first infant that nearly felled her. They figured out to spray the antidote into the face of the infant. Martha wanted to do the first one, insisted that if anything happened she wanted it on her conscience and not the already

She did not want to look the first time. They had figured, that is she and the Doctor, had seemed to understand, with the help of who they now called Chuck, the thing in the man suit. They had to spray into the face of the hapless newborns, though, as the Doctor pointed out as she held one of them in her arms the same way she once held Adric, before he had become a wriggly mound of mobility, that the beings inside were not as innocent as the bodies they were now inhabiting.

"But what happens to them? I mean after those things are evicted?"

"You ask this now?" the Doctor said, his head cocked to one side, his arms holding an infant.

"Yeah, I'm asking this now." Martha nodded and spoke again. "Are they going to, you know, be all right?"

The Doctor sighed. "This is sort of metaphysical, Martha. It's not as simple as just spray and their souls return. Before, in Farringham, they took those people and ate the souls. The bodies were there to do with as they pleased. " The Doctor jostled the infant he held nervously.

"But, what happens? I mean how do we know this won't kill them?"

"We don't know." he insisted. The Doctor turned and looked the woman in the eyes. "I don;t know, Martha I Have no idea. Do you understand that?"

Martha shook her head. "We should have tried this on one of them first."

He turned to her. "And if it didn't work, what were the other options, hmm?" he asked dutifully, still holding the tiny infant in his hands. "What were the other options again?"

She looked at him with the disbelief of an atheist at a baptism. "Are you serious?" she railed angrily. "You are telling me we have gone into this blindly, no resources except for a man we met driving an orange truck?"

"What would you rather do?" he hissed in the quiet of the nursery. "What are the alternatives to this?"

"But, that's just it, you always have a plan B. I have never seen you not have a backup plan."

"They killed them, Martha. That is the truth of it, the bodies they take, the original soul, being essences…whatever you want to call it, it dies." He sighed wearily. "The four, the Family. I sent their bodies into horrible existences. They were giving an eternity of life in those bodies because I knew what had been there before was gone."

Silence fell between them and hung in the air thick and heavy like a too hot day at the beach. She sighed then and hefted the bottle of hope that stood between them. "So, this is all we have?" She asked sadly.

"Hope." He nodded. "Best thing in the universe. The whole thing could collapse without it." He tried. But, Martha could see through his forced smile like the man behind the curtain. He didn't have all the answers. Maybe, most times, he was the smartest man in the room, or even the smartest man in the whole building. But, there were things he could not fix, things he could not right.

As if reading her mind, he spoke then, breaking the palpable silence and marring the shroud of distance that they had carefully constructed over their time together. . "I'm not a god Martha, my people are not gods. We don't build and level civilizations. The keys to time? We stumbled upon by accident because of the Untempered Schism. These infants, these precious little creatures who I cannot help but put Addy's face unto; I don't know what will happen to them, but I do know that it's the only options we have left. "

She nodded in his pause; what else could she do, except keep her eyes upon his as he spoke again with that same tone of frustration. "There is no easy fix for this one, Martha. I am as in the dark as you are."

She said nothing to the man beside her, she looked down onto the infant in her own arms; admitting silently that she too could find an unmistakable resemblance to Addy. The Doctor had been both vulnerable and correct; there was nothing else, and these were the smallest victims they had ever to save.

"Let me do the first one." He insisted suddenly placing his long slender hand onto the spray bottle.

"No glass jars," she returned, pulling it out of his grasp so easily that Martha knew then it was not an offer, or a command. He had said the words out of polite guileless abeyance, and, in truth, she could see that he wanted her to do the first one; needed her to do it. For the first time ever, |Martha began to see that the Doctor was truly no god, just a man from a different planet. He was fallible and flawed, had weaknesses and strengths. "I got this."

His nod and sigh of relief told her all she needed to know and gave her the strength to do the first infant. The spray nozzle was adjustable and metered out the correct dosage for the infant. The greenish cloud that rose off of the baby and dissipated was expected, but the two people in the nursery held their collective breath as the infant stirred after the dosage and let out a fitful wail.

XXXXXXXXXX

It was almost comical watching Jack and Jenny run past the large nursery window in sporadic bursts. They had been given the order to only shoot feet and knees, and after the last infant was dosed, the Doctor stepped out of the room and gave the bottle to Jenny. He made a point to rub his hands together vigorously before speaking. "Now they can put the guns down."

Martha shook her head but decided not to comment on his distaste for weapons. "Good, why don't you come and help me get them all settled, then. " She smirked.,

He leapt into it; Martha was surprised at how natural he was with the infants, feeding then burping them with all the care of a practiced midwife. "Don't look so surprised, Martha." The Doctor grinned from the rocking chair where he held a set of twins, holding two bottles in one hand and feeding them easily. "Aside from Addy, I have had children before."

She nodded, she had assumed as much and it was obvious. "Yeah, it's just. Man, do you have to be so good at it? You are sorta giving me a complex over here." Martha smiled from the changing table where she had lined up three infants.

"It's like riding a bicycle. Well a bicycle that hits you across the head loudly and wakes you at odd hours of the night. You know, that sort of bicycle."

"Addy was that bad for a time." She nodded.

"I know, " he said leaning closer to her. "I remember you know. I remember it all. "

"Well, Addy was as human was as rubbish as you are. Colic, awful sleep patterns…" she shook her head. And I have this constant nagging feeling that I am doing everything wrong, and he will wind up in need of some intergalactic form of

"Gets easier as it goes, I suppose." He said with a sigh, placing one twin on his shoulder and patting the back of the other sprawled on his lap. Maybe next time will be much easier; you know practice being what it is on the road to perfection."

The silence returned into the nursery again, and Martha felt her back stiffen and her heart race. "You seem bothered by that idea." The Doctor said evenly.

"I never thought that was something on the table." She answered as casually as possible.

"Anything's on the table, Martha. Everything." He looked out the nursery window for a moment as if searching for strength. "We don't have to be these strangers that we have imposed ourselves to be. The roles are ours to choose." The Doctor gave an odd sniff and settled back into the chair.

Martha relieved him of one of the twins, ignoring the pointed look he gave her. He watched her as she cared for one then the other. After a few minutes all of the children were calm, a dozen infants cared for by them slept in their bassinets.

"The table," she began "You think there are many possibilities with it?"

"Endless, Martha. Endless." He emphasized it with a reach for her hand she let him take it int his and bowed her head suddenly shy. "Chairs plates spoons..."

"All kinds of settings for it." She agreed.

"And let's not forget how the table is mad, hundreds of different types, shapes, orate, plain." He raised her head with his hand and met her eyes. "The point is to not be afraid of sitting at it, of choosing which one to make."

"Maybe we should talk about that soon."

He nodded. "As soon as all of this is under control."

As f on cue, Jack popped his head through the nursery door and grinned wolfishly. "Ok, we got a handle on them all, great work getting the stuff Doc, did the trick. We got the baddies back to goodies, found the rest of the hospital staff in the basement. Its a real mess, gonna take a lot of Retcon to fix this one."


	22. I Don't Mind Riding Around I

**I am so sorry this has taken so long. My real life coupled with writer's block really got in the way with this one. I will finish this, i promise. Thanks for all the love and reviews you guys, seriously it really brightens up my day to hear how you love, or hate or whatever, this little fic. **

The rotor began to move in its ancient motion and Martha could not help but watch its steady undulation. It was one of her favorite places on the TARDIS, the clm and serenity juxtaposed against the heightened mania that often erupts in the console room.

The day had been saved, once again, and all had been put back to it's rightful and judicious place. The flies were decimated, sent again to their planet. Jack had done his magic; the team of miscreants known as Torchwood had come in and cleaned the hospital.

"Gas main break." Jack had assured the staff as Mickey through her knowing glances. She was certain he had more to say, but his silence was more verbosity than she could stand.

After leaving the hospital, Martha, Jenny and the Doctor made their way back to Sarah Jane's. She again declined a trip in the ancient ship, and promised that when Luke was old enough, he would see the wonders of the universe.

All of it was null and void noise in her ears as she held Addy in her arms, his sweet scent filled her nostrils and pushed aside all of the pain and anxiety of the last forty eight hours.

The Doctor stood behind her, making faces at the sall child in her arms. Addy's responses were different now that his essence was returned. The faces that John Bowman once made at his son elicited fits of giggles, smiles and wild wriggling.

The baby now fixed an odd glare at the man behind her, he seemed quieter, less active, more focused.

Less human.

The ship was mostly empty now. Jack had returned to TORCHWOOD and Sarah Jane's goodbye left a hole in the ancient ship. The two parents stood close, enjoying the moment of bliss in the happy and serene small sounds that the infant made.

"So, where to now?" jenny's voice came form across the room; having laid claim to her own room, she burst into the console room all blond he=air and accusatory looks at the scene in front of the rotor.

The Doctor moved away from Martha as if caught by a watchful parent. Martha sighed at his reaction and painted on a smile. "Well," the Doctor began, leaning against the console and folding his arms. "We could put it up for a vote."

The two women eyed each other, though Martha noted Jenny's glare was far more dissapproving against Martha's own look of curiosity. "I vote somewhere exotic." the young blond gushed as she moved to stand beside her father.

The Doctor, as if repentant for his earlier actions looked to Martha for her opinion. "It doesn't matter to me," she smiled, snuggling Addy closer to her chest. "I think I am going to beg off any grand adventures for a bit in lieu of a good rest."

"Oh, come on, I think a good adventure is what we need, get the juices pumping and the blood going..." he stopped suddenly as if only just realizing the baby in her arms. "Right, rest. Good idea."

Martha shook her head but smiled. "I think a little Daddy-daughter tie would be good for the both of you." she said, glancing between the two Time Lords. "You've nly just found each other, you should get to know one another."

Jenny nodded as if it had been her idea all along. "I thought we three could go to the Hurous system. There was a slave revolt there that seemed like it needed an extra boost to get going."

"AHHH" the Doctor smiled. "A good ole fashioned slave revolt. Can;t pass that up." He moved over to the console, but his hands stilled at the switches. "Martha." he said quietly, not raising his eyes from the machines in front of him.

She moved closer to his side, Jenny on his right, she moved to the left of him and placed a single hand on his back. She nodded for him to go on.

He sighed then, a long and plaintive sound foreign from him. "Jenny," he began/ "Martha needs a rest, and I would imagine I do too."

Jenny did not respond right away she cast a momentary angry glare at the dark skinned woman. "Okay," she nodded. "Can we go to a resort, or something?"

He sighed again. "I think, we should take a few hours..." he looked at Martha then amended, "...days rest. The lot of us have been through quite a bit in the last few days...months."

She folded her arms then, a move that reminded Martha both of the Doctor and Rose. "So we are on hiatus?" she asked with a pout.

The Doctor spoke slowly as if talking to a petulant child, and Martha supposed in a lot of ways, he was. "Jenny, it's been a long time since the TARDIS has been operational. We took a bit of a vacation on Earth for a while. "

It was Martha's turn to sigh, she knew the Doctor was giving a plausible out, a way to say no without actually saying it to his only daughter and worse et, he was doing it for her. She didn't want to be the reason he stayed in, but another, more irrational part of the young doctor was grateful for it.

For her part, Jenny stomped her foot before heading back into the halls of the ancient ship without another word. "Well," the Doctor acknowledged.

"This will be fun." Martha smirked.

He nodded but said nothing. They were floating in the Vortex, Martha could feel the gentle undulation under her feet. "You don't have to stick around, you know. I mean, you should go out and have some fun with Jenny."

"Who said anything about an excuse?" the Doctor asked flippantly. "She really does need an overhaul before we get back on the road, well unless you don;t like oxygen or gravity."

Martha shrugged and sat on the jump seat. Addy fell into a silent but urgent pattern of nursing and his small had lulled against her. "So how long before she is ready for a trip?"

"It depends," he shrugged.

"On what?"

"On how long of a rest you need." he answered, his eyes falling upon her.

"Doctor," Martha said with a shake of her head. "It's not necessary. Look, you need to go and do what it is you do, and you have help now. I think you should take some time with her."

"And I agree." he answered. "As soon as you are rested enough to join us." He came to sit next to her, his hand rested upon Addy's head as he nursed. John Bowman would do that often enough, and the gesture was oddly discomforting for her. "We've had a rough time of it, haven't we?" he asked quietly.

She had to nod, he was right and the things they had made it through were difficult but she had to admit that in some way it had made them stronger, more solid.

"We need to work on things." he began. "And I don;t mean the ship, although..." he looked around at the glowing console room. "I suppose she could use a thorough re haul."

"You mean us, don;t you?" Martha asked with a sudden burst or strength.

""Yeah, yeah I mean us." he sighed. "We had all that time, and in that time it w=really wasn't us, was it? Because it really wasn't me."

"There are parts of him I miss.:" she admitted.

"Couldn't say that about John Smith, could you?" he asked. "See I told you it would not be like the last time."

Martha didn't answer, the wounds were still too fresh to answer his words. The Doctor accepted her silence as assurance and went on. "We were close then, nearly got it right." he sighed. "I didn't want to go...don;t want to go anywhere without you, Martha. I meant what I said about this being anything you want it to be."

She opened her mouth to answer him, to affirm his intentions, but the yawn got hold of her and she tried to cover it with her free hand.

"You should sleep." he smiled, rising from the seat and taking her hand.

"Yeah, guess all that adventure really did wear me out." she said. Addy had long fallen asleep, tucked into the crook of her arm. "He's different, you know?"

"We'll figure it out." The Doctor answered as he lead her down the hall to her room.

"Or die trying," she smiled as he leaned into her to place a kiss on her lips and another feather brush on the sleeping baby's head.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The gradual lightening of her room alerted Martha to the dawn of a new day She had long appreciated the ancient ship's method of awakening her, soft and natural like a new day's sunrise. The crib at her side was empty, a sign that she had slept far longer than she had planned. Sure of her son's safety aboard the TARDIS, she stretched long and slow and allowed herself to awaken slowly.

The kitchen was her first stop once she emerged from her shower. Martha had spent six months as an earth bound mother, half of that time spent as a single mum. She welcomed the change of knowing that there was at least one other person to share the responsibility of his care.

The Cocoa Puffs were in the same place he always hid them, even in the flat in Manchester. The Doctor had a secret sugar addiction that was not so secret, and Martha had developed a love for the brown cereal.

When she turned from the cabinet above the refrigerator, she found Jenny and Addy at the table. Addy sat in a high chair that was an antique one hundred years before the American Civil War. "Is that safe?" she asked as she sat at the table across form the pair.

Jenny grabbed hold of the box and placed a few kernels of cereal in front of Addy who grabbed for them in his chubby pincered grasp. "It's perfectly safe." she announced without looking at the older woman.

Martha nodded and dug into her own cereal, watching the two across from her. Jenny really did seem to be completely enthralled in the baby next to her. She played small games with him, soon their game turned to mimicking sounds.

"He said it!" Jenny gushed suddenly, clapping her hands wildly and lifting the baby out of his seat.

Martha heard nothing, "Said what?" She asked the now retreating woman who had gathered the child in her arms and was off toward the door. She left her bowl of cereal on the table and followed the blond woman. "I didn't hear anything."

"You wouldn't," the young woman tossed back over her shoulder, her ponytail bobbed as Martha followed her through the hallway and into the massive library "Dad," Jenny called over to the Doctor who was stretched out over the large mahogany desk.

He raised his head from over the stack of books, and smiled at the entrants into his realm. "Well, that is still new. Never will get used to that one...again. " he rose from his seat and folded his arms, his eyes met Martha's and she returned a shrug of confusion.

"He said his first word." jenny asserted with a nod of her blond head. She hoisted the baby in her arms again and cooed at him followed by a word in a language Martha could not recognize.

Adric laid his head on Jenny's shoulder and repeated the word to the young woman.

The Doctor's reaction was instantaneous, a smile of sheer joy spread across his face and he leapt over the desk. "Well, that is just brilliant, innit it?" he purred, taking the baby from Jenny.

There were few times in her life that Martha had ever felt the Dodo. A smart woman from the moment she learned how to talk, Martha never felt left out of the punchline of a joke, nor was she the last student in the class to figure out the Algebraic equation. This time, however, this one time, she felt as if the entire universe was in on the joke, and she was left gob smacked in the slow lane.

The Doctor and Jenny fussed over Adric first attempting to get him to repeat the word, then prompting him to say even more words in repetition.

The Doctor must have noticed her confuson. His smile turned on her and he angled the baby nearer. "Say it again, Addy." he cooed.

Addy turned his brown eyes onto his mother and held out his arms to her. A sound that must have been a word escaped his small mouth and he smiled at his own brilliance.

"What is he saying?" Martha asked finally, taking him into her arms.

The Doctor placed a hand on her arm and smiled. "He's saying, Mother. In Gallifreyian."

"How does he know Gallifreyian?" Martha asked, then felt stupid at her own question. "Oh, I guess you would have been speaking it to him."

The Doctor shook his head. "No time, Martha. I haven't been," he looked at Jenny who shook her head as well.

"The TARDIS?" Martha asked.

The Doctor shook his head. "As far as I can tell, Martha, and you have to understand that the TARDIS, her language is Gallifreyian, she does not translate from it."

"Ok," Martha nodded her head for him to continue.

"When he came back onto the ship." The Doctor went on. "He, that is to say Addy, had only heard English for the last six months of his life."

"So, then his first words should have been in English, or Welsh, hell even Aabic. I don;t know, something Earthen...ish. Not a language that he has never herd before."

"But he has heard it." Jenny piped in with a broad smile. "Its what we hear, well mostly." Jenny finished her words with a knowing nod to Martha.

In the light of nothing else to do, Martha sighed and bowed to the absurd, after all, wasn't she the anomaly here? " Well, that is something." She said finally.

"He'll speak other languages as well, Martha." The Doctor added. Martha could see an attempt at mending fences, but she could not quite muster the energy to do more than nod and slink off.

It was hard for her to place a logical finger upon what made her feel at odds with the situation. Adric was a special child, loved and cared for. But, since their return to the ship a day ago, she had begun to feel the alieness of both her situation, and her son.

In Manchester, he had been a fussy and fitful baby, but now his cadence of quiet observation ignored her. She had never tried to fool herself as to where he came from, that Adric was a child of differing parentage was a fact that lay next to her in bed each night.

The Doctor came behind her, and Martha noted he was alone this time. "What is it?" he asked

She shook her head as they moved through the seemingly endless halls of the TARDIS. "Nothing is always something, Martha. At least, when it comes to you humans."

"You humans? God, there really was some of you in that John Smith, wasn't there?" The words came out far more acidic than she had intended.

"Wait, what?" No…wait….What?" He sputtered.

"Doctor," Martha posed, "Do you recall what you said to me? About Galifreyian, when we were standing in his room the first day I came back?"

HE nodded, "I said, that I hoped he would learn it, that he would be another person to speak it to. "

"Martha nodded. "Why? Why did you hope he would speak your original language? I mean, there are hundreds, thousand…"

"...trillions of them, yeah I know, I speak most of them." he answered with a nod.

"But, why?" she asked, hoping to drive her point home.

He shrugged, "Why does anyone expect their child to speak their language? I suppose if we were all born speaking a different language than our parents...Hang on, we do, don;t we?"

"I'm ot going to get into a discussion about developmental psychology with you, Doctor." Martha said as a headache began to form behhind her eyes. "What I mean is, we want our children to be just like us; expect it, actually. At least until they grow up and develop little personalities of their own and leave home. Then, then we shake our heads and wonder where we went wrong. At least, that is my Mum's assertion."

The Doctor said nothing at first, he cocked his head a bit and offered her a sidelong glance before speaking. "That's what this is about, isn't it?" he asked finally. "It's not a language, or his first word in another language. It's about that look you gave him earlier; that look."

Martha squirmed a bit under his glare, "He's so different." she whispered.

The Doctor nodded again, "Yeah, yeah he is different. He isn;t as he was as a human, but." he placed his arms around her middle and drew Martha to him. "He still loves you. Whatever he may be, you were his first word, even if it was in a different language."

Martha nodded wetly, only just realizing the teas in her eyes.

"It all bled through, didn't it?" The Doctor whispered into her ear, the sleeping infant between them ow. "It bled through, Martha. Whatever he was, and whatever he is, he still loves you." He finished with a kiss on her forehead.

She was sure of the message wrapped within his words, Martha didn't need a cryptographer to explain them to her. "Jenny hates me." she giggled slightly.

He laughed back then, "Yeah, more than likely. But, she does';t really know you yet. Then, I am sure she will _really_ hate you."

The two of them shared a laugh then, an honest one that reverberated through the long corridors of the ancient ship. His hand raised to hold her free one, and he gave it a sincere and firm squeeze. "I have an idea." he began.

"Oh, that is never a good start to any conversation with you." she giggled quietly.

"Oi!" he smiled, then spoke to her quietly. "Can you meet me, in an hour?"

"We're here now." She answered, but fet her heart race.

"Cheeky," he said, "but I was thinking you could put him down, and maybe we could spend a bit of time, just you and I."

"Are we ready for that?" she whispered.

The Doctor brought his hands up in surrender but kept the same conspiritoy smile dangling on his lips. "Just an afternoon, or evening, or whatever it is. Oh, you know what I mean. Please?"

"One hour?" she mentally began to figure out how much time she would need to prepare for an afternoon or evening with him. "Sure, but I can't guarantee he'll cooperate." she nodded to the baby.

He smiled and moved away. "You let me worry about that." he grinned.

"Ok," she nodded unable to keep the smile from her lips. "Where? I mean, it is a big ship." They stopped in front of the door that lead to Addy's nursery.

The Doctor leaned into her again and whispered into her ear. "Just follow the breadcrumbs, just like the last time." His eyes flashed up toward the ceiling. "She'll help."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

An hour later, as if on cue, the lights in her room flashed as Martha had finished checking her makeup for the tenth time. She was as nervous as she had been on her first grown up date when she was seventeen.

The lights flickered along the corridors, leading her to a part of the ship she had never been before. The gentle nudge in her mind did remind her of that first night she had met Addy, held in suspension, between existence and nothingness. This time, however, she was going to a different destiny.

The lights dimmed when she made the wrong turn, and brightened as she twisted and turned. Along the right path. Five minutes past anything recognizable and she heard it, the soft strains of a familiar sound. Mozart poured through thhe halls and as she advanced through the turns, she recognized the piano playing was no recorded playback; she would have recognized it in her sleep.

He was seated at one of the largest pianos she had ever seen, in a room large enough to hold a football match. He played as he had as John Bowman, with the passion and intensity that always left her breathless. Dressed much the same way as John did, the Doctor had even worn glasses, and as she slid into the bench next to him and slid one arm around him, Martha noted he was even barefoot.

"You're overdressed." he spoke as the strains of the concerto died into an intermezzo.

"I hope that is not some sort of cheap come on." she smiled with false indignation.

The Doctor stood and took her hand in his. "No, no." he shook his head and lead her to the other end of the hall. "Its just, I wanted to have a picnic." he answered pushing open the double doors. "In the garden."


End file.
